1 00:01:02,605 --> 00:01:04,898 THE BAT MITZVAH 2 00:01:23,800 --> 00:01:27,630 It may not look like much now but wait till you see Poseidonis in 3D. 3 00:01:27,697 --> 00:01:30,394 - With Aquaman riding Storm. - What's Storm? 4 00:01:30,461 --> 00:01:32,694 That's his animatronic seahorse. 5 00:01:32,760 --> 00:01:35,592 Amazing. Eventually you won't even need actors, right? 6 00:01:35,658 --> 00:01:37,790 In five years we won't. 7 00:01:39,121 --> 00:01:40,588 Kidding. 8 00:01:40,654 --> 00:01:42,553 You still mad at me for bailing on dinner? 9 00:01:42,620 --> 00:01:44,452 I'm not mad at you. 10 00:01:44,516 --> 00:01:46,811 - So what's wrong? - Who says there's anything wrong? 11 00:01:46,882 --> 00:01:48,788 I know you. I can tell. 12 00:01:48,848 --> 00:01:51,714 Vince, you haven't known me in like five years. 13 00:01:51,788 --> 00:01:54,848 True. You've probably changed a lot. I've changed a lot. I learned French. 14 00:01:54,918 --> 00:01:57,601 I didn't know these two had a history. 15 00:01:57,675 --> 00:01:59,370 It's nothing. 16 00:01:59,446 --> 00:02:01,942 Even if something was wrong, I think it's egotistical 17 00:02:02,007 --> 00:02:04,230 that you just assume it's about you. 18 00:02:04,308 --> 00:02:06,263 That's right. I mean, you're right. 19 00:02:06,336 --> 00:02:09,033 But I'm right too. There is something wrong. So what is it? 20 00:02:09,085 --> 00:02:09,853 Nothing. 21 00:02:11,268 --> 00:02:13,033 I don't want to talk about it with you. 22 00:02:13,095 --> 00:02:16,492 We're gonna be up here for a while, we might as well talk about something. 23 00:02:16,566 --> 00:02:19,321 I had a fight with Chris. 24 00:02:19,398 --> 00:02:21,550 I don't want to talk about that. 25 00:02:21,626 --> 00:02:25,083 Vince, how are we ever going to make this movie together? 26 00:02:25,155 --> 00:02:26,982 They're gonna make this movie together 27 00:02:27,058 --> 00:02:29,882 because between them they're making $million. 28 00:02:29,957 --> 00:02:32,682 Fucking actors, they never know when they're miked, 29 00:02:32,766 --> 00:02:35,583 it was weird, on "True lies" 30 00:02:35,657 --> 00:02:39,382 it was Tom Arnold that said he was gonna be governor. 31 00:02:39,445 --> 00:02:41,410 Uh, excuse me, Mr. Cameron. 32 00:02:41,475 --> 00:02:42,941 - Yeah? - Ron's on the phone. 33 00:02:43,015 --> 00:02:46,101 There seems to be a small problem with the hovercraft. 34 00:02:46,178 --> 00:02:48,001 What is it? 35 00:02:48,077 --> 00:02:50,570 - It won't hover. - God damn it. 36 00:02:51,488 --> 00:02:52,232 Gary? 37 00:02:52,408 --> 00:02:55,142 I hope these two are not going to be a fucking problem, Eric. 38 00:02:55,265 --> 00:02:56,932 Go ahead, Jim. 39 00:02:57,005 --> 00:02:59,361 Gary, I need you at the hovercraft right now, over. 40 00:02:59,436 --> 00:03:01,163 Flying in. 41 00:03:02,668 --> 00:03:05,622 What happened with you and Chris? I want to know. 42 00:03:05,685 --> 00:03:07,683 Right now we're having communication issues. 43 00:03:07,728 --> 00:03:09,073 We had those. 44 00:03:09,128 --> 00:03:11,193 - You got to be more upfront. - Oh really? 45 00:03:12,998 --> 00:03:15,523 If we're talking about someone who's never been upfront, 46 00:03:15,586 --> 00:03:17,782 we should be talking about you. 47 00:03:17,857 --> 00:03:20,983 - What? - Well I'm going to be upfront now. 48 00:03:22,516 --> 00:03:24,410 I'm not over you. 49 00:03:25,887 --> 00:03:28,543 And I haven't gotten over you. 50 00:03:30,877 --> 00:03:33,340 How's that for upfront? 51 00:03:33,407 --> 00:03:36,471 We are so fucked. 52 00:03:36,545 --> 00:03:39,901 So first you tell me your rationship with this girl was meaningless. 53 00:03:39,975 --> 00:03:41,901 Then I find out that you proposed to her. 54 00:03:41,975 --> 00:03:44,701 Then you tell me you haven't thought about her in five years 55 00:03:44,766 --> 00:03:46,700 when, as sick as it is, you're still in love with her. 56 00:03:46,765 --> 00:03:48,490 How can I trust anything you say anymore? 57 00:03:48,568 --> 00:03:51,091 How can I trust you? You're the one eavesdropping. 58 00:03:51,165 --> 00:03:53,622 Should have Gavin de Becker come sweep the house for bugs. 59 00:03:53,697 --> 00:03:55,421 You know what? This is a bad situation. 60 00:03:55,495 --> 00:03:57,553 You know what, E? There's is no situation. 61 00:03:57,625 --> 00:04:00,692 Mandy is engaged. You're acting like an obsessed schoolgirl. 62 00:04:00,755 --> 00:04:03,622 E, do me a favor. Manage my career, not my relationships. 63 00:04:03,686 --> 00:04:05,550 This is your career. And mine too, all right? 64 00:04:05,617 --> 00:04:07,612 In front of James Cameron, stop lying to me. 65 00:04:07,687 --> 00:04:10,743 I don't want to talk about this in front of the guys. I'm serious. 66 00:04:10,818 --> 00:04:13,482 Vince, Armani doesn't have a suit for under two grand. 67 00:04:13,546 --> 00:04:15,040 Don't worry, it's all on me. 68 00:04:15,106 --> 00:04:16,902 Seriously, do we need to wear suits? 69 00:04:16,928 --> 00:04:19,453 What else are you going to wear to a Bat Mitzvah? A Knick jersey? 70 00:04:19,477 --> 00:04:21,103 It's formal. I was thinking home whites. 71 00:04:21,175 --> 00:04:23,102 How come you're not trying anything on? 72 00:04:23,175 --> 00:04:25,171 I don't let other men buy my clothes, Drama. 73 00:04:25,236 --> 00:04:27,402 And I'm not paying two grand for a suit myself. 74 00:04:27,456 --> 00:04:29,683 Wear the suit you wore for your high school graduation. 75 00:04:29,708 --> 00:04:31,273 It's hanging in your closet. 76 00:04:31,306 --> 00:04:33,163 I thought that was his communion suit. 77 00:04:33,235 --> 00:04:35,893 E didn't grow much from communion to high school graduation. 78 00:04:35,936 --> 00:04:37,400 It's probably the same suit. 79 00:04:37,427 --> 00:04:39,041 Fuck you guys. I'm going to Men's Warehouse. 80 00:04:39,067 --> 00:04:41,922 Oh come on, E. I think you can afford a nice suit. 81 00:04:41,996 --> 00:04:44,592 Yeah, E. Don't be such a chaza. 82 00:04:44,656 --> 00:04:46,652 I'm brushing up on my Hebrew for the affair. 83 00:04:46,727 --> 00:04:48,680 Chaza means greedy, Drama, not cheap. 84 00:04:48,758 --> 00:04:51,451 - How do you know? - E used to valet park at Ohav Shalom. 85 00:04:51,525 --> 00:04:54,550 That's great, Drama. Now you're illiterate in two languages. 86 00:04:54,616 --> 00:04:56,611 Let's hit shoes. 87 00:04:56,687 --> 00:04:59,381 Men's Warehouse? 88 00:04:59,446 --> 00:05:01,913 Don't start. 89 00:05:01,978 --> 00:05:03,870 What do you think, red or blue? 90 00:05:03,947 --> 00:05:07,173 The red's a little flashy for a Bat Mitzvah, Vince. I like the blue. 91 00:05:07,246 --> 00:05:10,602 Okay. How did you know we were going to a Bat Mitzvah? 92 00:05:10,678 --> 00:05:12,530 - You don't remember me? - Sloan. 93 00:05:12,608 --> 00:05:14,533 - Sloan McQuewick, right? - That's right. 94 00:05:14,608 --> 00:05:16,503 Good memory. Eric, right? 95 00:05:16,578 --> 00:05:18,131 Yeah, good memory too. 96 00:05:18,206 --> 00:05:20,660 This is Terrance's daughter. Terrance is Ari's boss. 97 00:05:20,735 --> 00:05:24,091 - Ari's partner. - That's right. Now I remember. 98 00:05:24,168 --> 00:05:26,863 - Do you? - No, not really. 99 00:05:26,925 --> 00:05:28,693 I'm sorry, how did we meet? 100 00:05:28,765 --> 00:05:31,452 The Christmas party, last year. You were going to Italy, right? 101 00:05:31,527 --> 00:05:34,051 That's right. You were thinking about getting engaged. 102 00:05:34,128 --> 00:05:36,052 - What? - We had a couple drinks. 103 00:05:36,128 --> 00:05:38,121 More than a couple, I think. 104 00:05:38,188 --> 00:05:39,651 I take it you didn't then. 105 00:05:39,727 --> 00:05:41,482 Oh no. We broke up. 106 00:05:42,887 --> 00:05:45,913 So, will I be seeing you both at Ari's party? 107 00:05:45,988 --> 00:05:49,513 - Yeah. - Great. We'll have fun. 108 00:05:49,578 --> 00:05:51,710 - See ya. - Nice to meet you again. 109 00:05:51,776 --> 00:05:54,573 Well, Vince, what else can we do for you today? 110 00:05:54,646 --> 00:05:56,913 I'm just going to look at some more ties and that's it. 111 00:05:56,945 --> 00:05:57,483 Great. 112 00:05:57,508 --> 00:06:00,371 Know what, Philip? I think I'm going to buy myself a new suit. 113 00:06:00,437 --> 00:06:03,030 What? She's not engaged. 114 00:06:05,035 --> 00:06:06,960 Don't even think about not picking that up, Ray, 115 00:06:07,035 --> 00:06:09,862 - 'cause I'll fucking kill you. - Fuck you, Ari. 116 00:06:24,428 --> 00:06:26,783 Fabulous, baby. Fabulous. 117 00:06:30,857 --> 00:06:33,411 Hey, is it me or is her voice getting worse? 118 00:06:33,485 --> 00:06:36,413 Doesn't mean that I don't love her, but she's just awful, baby. 119 00:06:36,486 --> 00:06:38,513 Hey kids. Whose car's out front? 120 00:06:38,575 --> 00:06:40,543 Terrance. He's waiting for you out back. 121 00:06:40,615 --> 00:06:42,903 Terrance is here? Why's he here? 122 00:06:42,976 --> 00:06:45,442 I don't know. Why don't you find out? 123 00:06:45,507 --> 00:06:47,502 Ari, what are you freaking out about? 124 00:06:47,578 --> 00:06:50,501 Guy lives three blocks from us and hasn't been by in five years. 125 00:06:50,578 --> 00:06:54,000 Now he shows up four hours before we're supposed to see him. Something's up. 126 00:06:54,066 --> 00:06:55,832 - Ari. - What? 127 00:06:55,898 --> 00:06:58,631 You're a partner now. You don't need to be afraid of him anymore. 128 00:06:58,698 --> 00:07:01,392 I'm afraid of him? I'll beat that old fuck and throw him in the pool. 129 00:07:01,466 --> 00:07:03,890 Only daddy speaks that way. 130 00:07:05,975 --> 00:07:06,693 Out. 131 00:07:11,126 --> 00:07:13,253 - There he is. - Ari! 132 00:07:13,328 --> 00:07:15,021 Terrance, what a pleasant surprise. 133 00:07:15,086 --> 00:07:17,080 - Nice to see you, mate. - Nice to see you. 134 00:07:17,156 --> 00:07:18,850 - Sweaty. - Ha ha. 135 00:07:18,918 --> 00:07:20,980 Well, I'm looking forward to this evening. 136 00:07:21,047 --> 00:07:22,910 Yeah, well it should be fun, huh? 137 00:07:22,988 --> 00:07:25,470 Cost me enough, it better be. 138 00:07:25,547 --> 00:07:27,570 I hope you're not going to try and expense 139 00:07:27,648 --> 00:07:29,540 any of this Bat Mitzvah to the agency. 140 00:07:29,768 --> 00:07:30,391 Me? 141 00:07:32,195 --> 00:07:35,800 Ah, so little Sarah becomes a woman tonight. 142 00:07:36,295 --> 00:07:37,071 Yeah. 143 00:07:37,775 --> 00:07:39,533 Time flies. Incredible, isn't it? 144 00:07:39,602 --> 00:07:41,208 It seems like only yesterday 145 00:07:41,268 --> 00:07:43,864 that my Sloan was running around in pigtails and braces. 146 00:07:43,938 --> 00:07:45,238 - Amazing. - Yeah yeah. 147 00:07:45,295 --> 00:07:46,993 You know, speaking of Sloan, 148 00:07:47,066 --> 00:07:50,922 she mentioned that she ran into Vincent Chase in Beverly Hills. 149 00:07:50,995 --> 00:07:53,651 You know, she can't stop raving about this guy. 150 00:07:53,727 --> 00:07:57,350 She thinks he's gonna be a giant movie star. 151 00:07:57,426 --> 00:07:59,250 I've been saying that for five years. 152 00:07:59,326 --> 00:08:01,280 Yes, but Sloan is never wrong. 153 00:08:01,358 --> 00:08:03,213 You know, she saw Johnny Depp 154 00:08:03,285 --> 00:08:05,381 in "Platoon" when she was eight years old 155 00:08:05,455 --> 00:08:08,240 and she said, "dad, that's the guy to watch." 156 00:08:08,316 --> 00:08:10,542 You showed her "Platoon" when she was eight years old? 157 00:08:10,615 --> 00:08:13,570 - Oliver did. He wanted feedback. - Ha ha ha. 158 00:08:13,645 --> 00:08:15,942 Listen, the reason for my visit is 159 00:08:16,015 --> 00:08:18,902 I'd like a little chat with Mr. Chase tonight. 160 00:08:18,976 --> 00:08:20,573 I'd like to see into his head, 161 00:08:20,647 --> 00:08:23,771 Find out what his hopes and his dreams are. 162 00:08:23,837 --> 00:08:26,703 We've had that talk dozens of times, 163 00:08:26,778 --> 00:08:28,663 And I could tell you firsthand-- 164 00:08:28,737 --> 00:08:31,931 No, firsthand would be him telling me. 165 00:08:33,735 --> 00:08:37,193 So listen, why don't you give me 166 00:08:37,266 --> 00:08:39,320 a proper introduction tonight, huh? 167 00:08:39,396 --> 00:08:43,451 - I mean, make an old man happy. - Yeah. 168 00:08:43,528 --> 00:08:46,180 Oh, listen... 169 00:08:47,557 --> 00:08:50,880 - This is for the little lady. - Oh. 170 00:08:50,958 --> 00:08:54,080 I didn't want my gift to get mixed up with all the others. 171 00:08:55,696 --> 00:08:56,463 Huh? 172 00:09:02,577 --> 00:09:04,243 Would you stop? 173 00:09:04,318 --> 00:09:06,903 - You're gonna spoil your appetite. - You're not my mother. 174 00:09:06,977 --> 00:09:08,640 If I'm not eating, you're not eating. 175 00:09:08,706 --> 00:09:10,132 I'm fucking starving! 176 00:09:10,205 --> 00:09:12,100 Do you know how much food is gonna be at this thing? 177 00:09:12,175 --> 00:09:13,962 You eating right now would be like jerking off 178 00:09:14,038 --> 00:09:15,501 an hour before fucking a supermodel. 179 00:09:15,566 --> 00:09:17,833 If I was fucking a supermodel, I would jerk off. 180 00:09:17,898 --> 00:09:19,632 That way I can go all night. 181 00:09:19,695 --> 00:09:22,131 - You guys ready for a big night? - You sure Ari wants us there? 182 00:09:22,195 --> 00:09:24,661 Of course he does, Turtle. Ari looks at us as family. 183 00:09:24,728 --> 00:09:27,393 Then why doesn't he represent me? 184 00:09:27,467 --> 00:09:30,850 Oh hey! Look at this guy! 185 00:09:30,936 --> 00:09:34,153 $3,000 suit just to line up some pussy, huh, E? 186 00:09:34,225 --> 00:09:37,950 It's a good investment. McQuewick's gotta be worth 100 million easy. 187 00:09:38,018 --> 00:09:41,680 You buying that suit is like buying Microsoft in the '80s. 188 00:09:41,756 --> 00:09:43,613 That's if you can get the girl. 189 00:09:43,685 --> 00:09:46,341 - I just needed a new suit, that's all. - Oh yeah? 190 00:09:46,415 --> 00:09:48,212 - What about the hair? - What about it? 191 00:09:48,275 --> 00:09:51,242 - A little shiny. - Mangoes. 192 00:09:51,315 --> 00:09:53,070 - Don't smell me. - Uh-oh. 193 00:09:53,128 --> 00:09:55,743 Looks like we're headed for another E romance novel. 194 00:09:55,788 --> 00:09:56,870 Get your tissues ready, guys. 195 00:09:56,907 --> 00:09:58,802 Seriously, if this one breaks your heart, 196 00:09:58,876 --> 00:10:01,030 just kill yourself so we don't have to hear about it. 197 00:10:01,106 --> 00:10:03,351 I'll have the Barry Manilow CD ready for you. 198 00:10:03,397 --> 00:10:05,602 - Fuck you guys. - What are you so sensitive about? 199 00:10:05,627 --> 00:10:07,652 We know you well enough to know you're in for trouble. 200 00:10:07,666 --> 00:10:10,162 Yeah? How well do we know you, Vince? 201 00:10:10,237 --> 00:10:11,802 What does that mean? 202 00:10:11,846 --> 00:10:13,610 Yeah, why are you going off on Vince for? 203 00:10:13,668 --> 00:10:15,591 No reason. 204 00:10:15,666 --> 00:10:18,292 - All right, what's up? - Nothing. 205 00:10:18,358 --> 00:10:21,823 Look, I didn't want to waste a Saturday night on a Bat Mitzvah anyway. 206 00:10:21,888 --> 00:10:24,581 You guys don't wanna tell me what's up, I ain't going. 207 00:10:24,655 --> 00:10:26,410 - Me neither. - Ask Vince. 208 00:10:26,485 --> 00:10:29,511 I told you I didn't want to talk about it in front of them. 209 00:10:29,585 --> 00:10:32,840 Them? Since when are we them? 210 00:10:32,917 --> 00:10:35,212 Next thing you know, E's gonna be his brother. 211 00:10:35,746 --> 00:10:37,203 You're a fuckin' dick. 212 00:10:39,447 --> 00:10:42,043 Fine. Tell 'em. 213 00:10:42,106 --> 00:10:44,632 Vince isn't over Mandy. He never has been. 214 00:10:44,708 --> 00:10:47,102 - He's been lying all along. - What are you talking about? 215 00:10:47,176 --> 00:10:49,860 He told her he loved her today in front of James fucking Cameron. 216 00:10:49,935 --> 00:10:52,330 - I didn't use those words. - I thought she was getting married. 217 00:10:52,407 --> 00:10:54,263 - Great mother of God. - This is why 218 00:10:54,337 --> 00:10:56,430 we told you to get her off the movie, E! 219 00:10:56,497 --> 00:10:59,292 Yeah, E, if this movie gets fucked up, it's on you. 220 00:10:59,368 --> 00:11:01,591 No, look, nothing's getting fucked up, okay? 221 00:11:01,665 --> 00:11:04,351 I am fine. I am just living my life. 222 00:11:04,427 --> 00:11:08,252 You know, in fact, I was planning on living my life again tonight 223 00:11:08,327 --> 00:11:10,221 till you decided to stake your claim with Sloan 224 00:11:10,256 --> 00:11:12,673 with your new suit and your fruity new hair. 225 00:11:12,696 --> 00:11:13,092 What? 226 00:11:13,135 --> 00:11:15,400 We all know how you like to fall in love at the drop of a hat. 227 00:11:15,455 --> 00:11:17,611 Did you ever think that maybe I was interested too? 228 00:11:17,685 --> 00:11:20,581 What are you talking-- You didn't even remember who she was. 229 00:11:20,648 --> 00:11:24,210 Don't worry, E. You spoke up first. 230 00:11:24,277 --> 00:11:26,613 It's okay. I'll step down. 231 00:11:30,648 --> 00:11:32,601 I don't need you to back off. 232 00:11:32,675 --> 00:11:34,701 Oh, E, don't wake a sleeping giant. 233 00:11:34,775 --> 00:11:37,501 Seriously, E. Take the offer while it's hot on the table. 234 00:11:37,565 --> 00:11:39,033 I had a connection with this girl. 235 00:11:39,107 --> 00:11:40,830 So what, she's just gonna flip to Vince? 236 00:11:40,905 --> 00:11:42,663 You have a 25-mile lead in the marathon. 237 00:11:42,737 --> 00:11:44,730 Once Vince laces up his shoes, it's over. 238 00:11:44,795 --> 00:11:47,693 At least if he bangs Sloan, he'll get over his obsession with Mandy. 239 00:11:47,766 --> 00:11:50,293 It might be worth the sacrifice to save the movie. 240 00:11:50,368 --> 00:11:52,890 Look, Vince, if you wanna go for her, go for her. 241 00:11:52,957 --> 00:11:54,852 Okay, fine, I will. 242 00:11:54,928 --> 00:11:57,453 You don't scare me, you famous fuck. 243 00:11:59,425 --> 00:12:02,510 Good move, E. You're gonna need all your facilities. 244 00:12:02,586 --> 00:12:04,513 My what, idiot? 245 00:12:05,886 --> 00:12:07,613 Did I say that wrong? 246 00:12:18,248 --> 00:12:19,672 Mazel tov. 247 00:12:22,608 --> 00:12:24,933 Congratulations. You look beautiful. 248 00:12:28,868 --> 00:12:31,462 Look at Terrance. I guarantee you his relatives worked with nazis. 249 00:12:32,167 --> 00:12:35,522 - Ari, compose yourself. - Compose myself? You hate Melinda too. 250 00:12:35,596 --> 00:12:38,922 - Quiet. I don't hate anybody. - Mazel tov, Ari. 251 00:12:38,995 --> 00:12:41,423 Hello, darling. You look great! Beautiful. 252 00:12:41,495 --> 00:12:44,350 - Thank you. - Hey, princess! 253 00:12:44,427 --> 00:12:46,720 - Melinda, it's so great to see you. - You too! 254 00:12:46,787 --> 00:12:48,781 - You look fabulous. - Thank you. 255 00:12:48,855 --> 00:12:51,211 Being a housewife certainly agrees with you. 256 00:12:51,285 --> 00:12:54,581 Playing a raging bitch on TV certainly agrees with you. You're so natural. 257 00:12:54,647 --> 00:12:58,141 If you hadn't quit acting at 25 it might have been you on a hit TV show. 258 00:13:00,817 --> 00:13:03,641 - Honey, I need a drink. - I think I need a drink too. 259 00:13:03,725 --> 00:13:06,652 Hey, I'm looking forward to my sit down with our boy. 260 00:13:08,175 --> 00:13:09,700 "Sit down." 261 00:13:09,775 --> 00:13:12,733 That schnitzel-loving fuck is trying to steal Vince-- Hi. 262 00:13:12,807 --> 00:13:15,031 - Nice to see you. Welcome. - Hello. 263 00:13:15,108 --> 00:13:17,332 Speaking of Vince, why did he bring three dates? 264 00:13:17,375 --> 00:13:19,432 That's the way it comes, a package deal. 265 00:13:19,475 --> 00:13:20,441 Where am I gonna sit them? 266 00:13:20,468 --> 00:13:22,063 I already talked to the caterer-- Hi. 267 00:13:22,128 --> 00:13:24,421 Everything's taken care of. Don't worry about it. 268 00:13:24,497 --> 00:13:27,893 Why are me and Drama sitting at table 19 and you guys are sitting at table six? 269 00:13:27,958 --> 00:13:30,982 Relax, Turtle. Ari probably just wants to spread out the celebs. 270 00:13:31,058 --> 00:13:34,182 Not to mention I haven't seen a single edible item since we got here. 271 00:13:34,255 --> 00:13:36,412 We just passed a sushi bar right there, Turtle. 272 00:13:36,488 --> 00:13:39,222 - Cooked items, E. - The yellowtail is amazing. 273 00:13:39,716 --> 00:13:42,612 - Patience, Turtle. - Hey, you boys missed temple. 274 00:13:42,688 --> 00:13:44,512 We thought that was for Jews only. 275 00:13:44,578 --> 00:13:47,973 Hi, Vince. Thanks so much for coming to my Bat Mitzvah. 276 00:13:48,045 --> 00:13:49,741 I wouldn't miss it for the world. 277 00:13:49,808 --> 00:13:52,572 - Look at you. You look beautiful. - Thanks, so do you. 278 00:13:52,645 --> 00:13:55,730 You look great too, E. What'd you do, raid the boys department at Macy's? 279 00:13:55,807 --> 00:13:58,700 You look pretty good too. You auditioning for "Guys and dolls"? 280 00:13:58,767 --> 00:14:01,302 Hey, boys, enjoy yourselves. Tonight we eat like kings. 281 00:14:01,368 --> 00:14:03,561 - 500 a head. - I'm starving. 282 00:14:03,606 --> 00:14:05,441 - I told you, - Smoke more weed, Turtle. 283 00:14:05,488 --> 00:14:07,030 Seriously, smoke more weed. 284 00:14:11,728 --> 00:14:13,793 She is pretty, huh? 285 00:14:13,876 --> 00:14:15,522 Ivy Leaguer too? 286 00:14:15,566 --> 00:14:17,353 I thought you didn't remember anything about her. 287 00:14:17,397 --> 00:14:19,282 Things are starting to come back. 288 00:14:19,356 --> 00:14:21,321 I think I'm gonna ask her to dance. 289 00:14:21,397 --> 00:14:24,050 - Oh, unless, of course, you wanna-- - Fuck you. 290 00:14:24,117 --> 00:14:25,580 Oh, I forgot, you don't dance. 291 00:14:25,657 --> 00:14:28,312 Great, you get a leg up on me because you've been training 292 00:14:28,388 --> 00:14:31,111 for the "Saturday night fever" remake for the last 20 years. 293 00:14:31,187 --> 00:14:33,813 I don't understand what you do at these things if you don't dance. 294 00:14:33,877 --> 00:14:36,341 - Why're you doing this? - Why'd you tell the guys about Mandy 295 00:14:36,415 --> 00:14:39,542 - when I asked you not to? - So what is this, payback? 296 00:14:39,607 --> 00:14:41,771 - I'm heading over. - I'm heading over with you. 297 00:14:50,167 --> 00:14:53,293 So what show did you say you were on again? 298 00:14:54,597 --> 00:14:56,893 "Viking Quest." 299 00:14:58,368 --> 00:14:59,890 What did he say? 300 00:15:03,455 --> 00:15:06,353 Excuse me, honey. What time's dinner? We're starving. 301 00:15:06,426 --> 00:15:08,723 Didn't you eat all the appetizers after temple? 302 00:15:08,788 --> 00:15:10,150 No, we missed temple. 303 00:15:10,226 --> 00:15:12,582 Sinners. It's going to be a while. 304 00:15:14,186 --> 00:15:16,582 I wanna kill you, Drama. 305 00:15:16,645 --> 00:15:18,510 So what exactly were you doing in Italy? 306 00:15:18,587 --> 00:15:21,571 A friend was opening a restaurant and I kinda helped her manage it. 307 00:15:21,646 --> 00:15:23,372 God, what a coincidence. 308 00:15:23,437 --> 00:15:25,412 E used to manage an Italian restaurant also. 309 00:15:25,458 --> 00:15:26,030 Really? 310 00:15:26,076 --> 00:15:28,270 - Well, yeah-- - Don't be embarrassed. 311 00:15:28,346 --> 00:15:30,671 It was the biggest Sbarro's in all of Kew Gardens. 312 00:15:30,735 --> 00:15:34,352 I love Sbarro's. I go to the one at the Beverly Center all the time. 313 00:15:34,437 --> 00:15:37,060 - Great sauce, right? - Yeah. 314 00:15:37,136 --> 00:15:40,062 Hey, Vince, my dad is dying to get a word in with you. 315 00:15:40,137 --> 00:15:42,461 - Would you mind if I went to get him? - By all means. 316 00:15:42,526 --> 00:15:44,220 Okay, I'll be right back. 317 00:15:46,226 --> 00:15:48,122 Already wants me to meet the family. 318 00:15:48,195 --> 00:15:50,050 You're seriously starting to annoy me. 319 00:15:50,128 --> 00:15:52,552 Ladies and gentlemen, can I have your attention? 320 00:15:52,625 --> 00:15:54,423 Excuse me, could I get your attention? 321 00:15:54,488 --> 00:15:57,423 Before I bring up the special family members 322 00:15:57,487 --> 00:15:59,851 for the lighting of the candle ceremony, 323 00:15:59,917 --> 00:16:03,513 I would love to say a couple things about this little girl right here. 324 00:16:03,587 --> 00:16:05,640 You know, when she was born 325 00:16:06,778 --> 00:16:08,840 I have to be honest, I wanted a boy. 326 00:16:09,908 --> 00:16:10,652 Easy! 327 00:16:10,918 --> 00:16:12,842 Wait a minute. Give me a break here. 328 00:16:12,907 --> 00:16:15,902 Now I didn't have any sisters and I didn't know what to expect. 329 00:16:18,607 --> 00:16:20,473 But this little girl changed my life. 330 00:16:20,537 --> 00:16:22,071 And, um... 331 00:16:22,135 --> 00:16:24,563 Watching her blossom into a woman 332 00:16:24,635 --> 00:16:28,233 has been one of the most remarkable things 333 00:16:28,296 --> 00:16:31,163 that I have ever seen. 334 00:16:33,166 --> 00:16:35,093 And from the time she could walk 335 00:16:35,168 --> 00:16:37,820 she would come into our room and she would jump on our bed 336 00:16:37,898 --> 00:16:40,123 and she would wake us up and we couldn't sleep. 337 00:16:40,198 --> 00:16:42,920 - I'd get about two hours of sleep... - Vince, this is my father. 338 00:16:42,987 --> 00:16:44,220 - Hello. - Nice to see you. 339 00:16:44,285 --> 00:16:46,180 And this is his wife Melinda Clarke. 340 00:16:46,257 --> 00:16:47,812 - Hi. - Hello. 341 00:16:47,887 --> 00:16:49,810 - And, daddy, this is Eric Murphy. - Ah. 342 00:16:49,888 --> 00:16:52,640 When was the last time we saw each other? 343 00:16:52,718 --> 00:16:55,670 Oh, it's been a while. I think since the Christmas party last year. 344 00:16:55,745 --> 00:16:57,713 Oh, that's right. That's right. 345 00:16:57,778 --> 00:16:59,543 We should let them get acquainted. 346 00:16:59,606 --> 00:17:01,540 - You wanna get a drink? - Yeah. 347 00:17:01,608 --> 00:17:04,570 - We'll be at the bar. - So, Vince, I have to say, 348 00:17:04,638 --> 00:17:07,231 I finally saw "Head on." I just have to say it was... 349 00:17:07,307 --> 00:17:10,732 - Fabulous. Simply fabulous. - Yeah. 350 00:17:10,807 --> 00:17:14,061 We finally found her asleep under our bed. 351 00:17:14,135 --> 00:17:17,093 And she didn't wake us. 352 00:17:19,967 --> 00:17:21,661 But she wanted to be near us. 353 00:17:21,725 --> 00:17:24,222 And I hope that she always will. 354 00:17:31,886 --> 00:17:34,410 Now, I would love to invite 355 00:17:34,485 --> 00:17:36,783 some of the family members-- Who's coming up now? 356 00:17:36,856 --> 00:17:39,082 - Grandpa Manny. We've got cousin... - Grandpa Manny, 357 00:17:39,145 --> 00:17:40,910 or as Sarah likes to call him "Munchie--" 358 00:17:40,985 --> 00:17:43,142 I would love to come up here. 359 00:17:43,218 --> 00:17:45,843 He's that-- He's that special-- 360 00:17:45,918 --> 00:17:48,300 Special breed of grandfather... 361 00:17:48,377 --> 00:17:50,300 You know what? A better idea I think 362 00:17:50,376 --> 00:17:53,332 would be to bring up sarah's star crush, 363 00:17:53,405 --> 00:17:56,762 Vinnie Chase, to cut the challah. 364 00:17:56,837 --> 00:18:00,203 Everybody put it together for Vinny Chase. 365 00:18:02,136 --> 00:18:04,663 - Ari, what the hell are you doing? - Vinnie Chase! 366 00:18:04,737 --> 00:18:06,693 Come on up and cut the challah. 367 00:18:13,955 --> 00:18:16,523 Look at that gorgeous piece of bread. 368 00:18:16,585 --> 00:18:20,551 It's like a big baked cloud. 369 00:18:20,618 --> 00:18:23,953 Imagine making a six-foot hero out of that thing. 370 00:18:24,017 --> 00:18:28,513 A little mortadella, some gabagol, provolone. 371 00:18:33,275 --> 00:18:36,602 Let's get this party started, huh? DJ Quick. Everybody dance. 372 00:18:36,678 --> 00:18:39,072 What about the blessing and the lighting of the candles? 373 00:18:39,136 --> 00:18:41,802 What more boring way to kill a party than to get 30 people up here 374 00:18:41,875 --> 00:18:45,462 and light a fucking candle? 375 00:18:51,996 --> 00:18:53,182 Thank God. 376 00:18:56,066 --> 00:18:57,991 What did you guys order? 377 00:18:58,067 --> 00:19:00,992 Uh, we didn't order anything. We were late. 378 00:19:01,055 --> 00:19:04,320 - But we'll take whatever you've got. - Well... 379 00:19:04,385 --> 00:19:06,352 What I got is 380 00:19:06,418 --> 00:19:08,583 two kosher vegetarians. 381 00:19:08,688 --> 00:19:11,582 Do you need some salt? 382 00:19:12,688 --> 00:19:15,012 Excuse me, sir. 383 00:19:15,086 --> 00:19:17,771 I will give you $100 for that prime rib. 384 00:19:19,275 --> 00:19:20,773 What'd he say? 385 00:19:23,357 --> 00:19:25,413 Oh, I love this song. 386 00:19:26,105 --> 00:19:27,903 Do you want to dance? 387 00:19:27,975 --> 00:19:30,271 Oh, you know what? I really-- I don't dance. 388 00:19:30,337 --> 00:19:32,402 Oh, come on. It'll be fun. 389 00:19:32,467 --> 00:19:34,563 No, not for you. People will be looking at you. 390 00:19:34,638 --> 00:19:36,930 - It'll be horrifying, trust me. - What's up, kids? 391 00:19:36,998 --> 00:19:39,492 - You guys having a good time? - Well, we were, 392 00:19:39,568 --> 00:19:41,700 but Eric here refuses to dance with me. 393 00:19:41,767 --> 00:19:43,122 Really? Why? 394 00:19:43,198 --> 00:19:46,323 Well, he says he doesn't like to dance. 395 00:19:46,398 --> 00:19:49,151 Since when? E, come, you used to love to dance as a child. 396 00:19:49,228 --> 00:19:52,751 You know what? He's a little insecure. I'll talk to him. 397 00:19:57,588 --> 00:20:00,783 Okay, fine. I did lie about the past. 398 00:20:00,848 --> 00:20:02,910 But I really believed I was over her. 399 00:20:02,985 --> 00:20:05,443 And then I saw her and I realized I wasn't. What do you want me to do? 400 00:20:05,517 --> 00:20:07,442 Get over her. Go make the movie. 401 00:20:07,505 --> 00:20:09,641 This coming from my manager or my best friend? 402 00:20:09,677 --> 00:20:10,113 Both. 403 00:20:10,145 --> 00:20:12,973 Look, she's in love with someone else. She's getting married. 404 00:20:13,048 --> 00:20:15,331 Thanks, buddy. 405 00:20:16,408 --> 00:20:17,771 Hey, Sloan. 406 00:20:17,838 --> 00:20:20,133 E wants you to dance with me 407 00:20:20,207 --> 00:20:22,460 so we can teach him a couple moves. 408 00:20:22,537 --> 00:20:25,630 We'll be back later. 409 00:20:37,425 --> 00:20:39,483 Shalom Aleichem. 410 00:20:39,558 --> 00:20:42,083 That's Hebrew for "what time do you get off tonight?" 411 00:20:42,126 --> 00:20:43,022 Cute. 412 00:20:43,076 --> 00:20:45,273 Ignore his inappropriate sexual advances. 413 00:20:45,318 --> 00:20:47,483 We're looking for one thing-- Meat. 414 00:20:47,546 --> 00:20:48,982 How stoned are you guys? 415 00:20:49,046 --> 00:20:50,881 - What? - No. 416 00:20:50,947 --> 00:20:52,882 I know exactly what you need. 417 00:20:52,945 --> 00:20:54,510 Come on, boys. 418 00:21:21,698 --> 00:21:24,892 Unbelievable. He's pimping his own daughter out. 419 00:21:24,955 --> 00:21:27,723 Sarah, come here, baby. Angel, come here. 420 00:21:27,786 --> 00:21:30,352 - Stop it, Ari. - Honey, go get your star crush. 421 00:21:30,417 --> 00:21:32,312 - Go ask him to dance right now. - Shut up, daddy! 422 00:21:32,388 --> 00:21:34,283 - You're so embarrassing me. - "Shut up, daddy." 423 00:21:34,346 --> 00:21:36,242 She's really a woman now. I have to get used to it. 424 00:21:36,315 --> 00:21:37,981 - You are being ridiculous. - I'm being-- 425 00:21:38,047 --> 00:21:40,540 That's exactly what you said at the "Bill and Ted" premier 426 00:21:40,617 --> 00:21:43,973 when Terrance said, "I'll take Keanu, you take the other guy." 427 00:21:44,047 --> 00:21:47,243 Ari, you've idolized Terrance since you were 20 years old 428 00:21:47,306 --> 00:21:49,630 and you've let him take advantage of you ever since. 429 00:21:49,707 --> 00:21:52,130 So stop it now. 430 00:21:52,206 --> 00:21:54,800 You're right, baby. 431 00:21:54,868 --> 00:21:57,402 - Just be a man. - "Just be a man." Really? 432 00:21:57,468 --> 00:21:59,462 You give me the whole heartfelt pump-up speech 433 00:21:59,536 --> 00:22:02,032 and then you say just go be a man? Come on. 434 00:22:14,286 --> 00:22:16,621 - I need to speak to you. - Hmm? 435 00:22:18,055 --> 00:22:20,253 I need to speak to you. 436 00:22:20,318 --> 00:22:23,212 - Ahem, I'm dancing with my wife-- - Now. 437 00:22:24,687 --> 00:22:26,182 Excuse me, darling. 438 00:22:26,247 --> 00:22:28,973 This better be good. 439 00:22:40,506 --> 00:22:42,903 - Where's my joint? - Where's the goods? 440 00:22:42,967 --> 00:22:44,602 Turn to your right. 441 00:22:44,668 --> 00:22:48,760 A kids' buffet? Sweet! 442 00:22:48,838 --> 00:22:51,263 - Thank you. - We got hot dogs, 443 00:22:51,328 --> 00:22:53,961 and chicken and pizza. 444 00:22:55,928 --> 00:22:57,851 Mac and cheese, baby! 445 00:22:59,655 --> 00:23:01,821 Vince is my client. 446 00:23:01,887 --> 00:23:05,082 I took him from nothing, all right? 447 00:23:05,156 --> 00:23:08,551 And now he is on the cusp. I ain't sharin' him. 448 00:23:08,616 --> 00:23:11,683 You know, when I started this company in 1971, 449 00:23:11,745 --> 00:23:14,213 my mantra was: "every client 450 00:23:14,307 --> 00:23:17,252 should be represented by every agent in the building." 451 00:23:17,347 --> 00:23:20,540 And, yes, all right, technically, he is your client. 452 00:23:20,608 --> 00:23:25,373 - But this is my agency. - And I'm a fucking partner. 453 00:23:25,438 --> 00:23:28,773 Well, I've had more than a few partners. 454 00:23:28,836 --> 00:23:30,800 Not all of them have lasted. 455 00:23:30,866 --> 00:23:33,633 - Enjoy your evening. - Ha. 456 00:23:40,928 --> 00:23:43,453 Good living, huh, kids? 457 00:23:43,677 --> 00:23:44,541 No doubt. 458 00:23:45,828 --> 00:23:47,393 You got a light? 459 00:23:47,557 --> 00:23:50,520 You've gotta be kidding me. Turtle, look at this kid. 460 00:23:50,587 --> 00:23:53,380 Jesus Christ! What, are you 13 and you're getting high? 461 00:23:53,455 --> 00:23:55,280 You're not gonna give us a lecture, are you? 462 00:23:55,356 --> 00:23:58,181 No, not a lecture, a life lesson. 463 00:23:58,246 --> 00:24:00,912 We know. You're talking to former addicts. 464 00:24:00,987 --> 00:24:03,013 Weed is a gateway drug, son. 465 00:24:03,076 --> 00:24:06,670 One day you're lighting up in full view of a dozen adults at a Bat Mitzvah, 466 00:24:06,748 --> 00:24:09,403 the next you're cruising Santa Monica Boulevard 467 00:24:09,475 --> 00:24:11,502 offering hand jobs for a crack rock. 468 00:24:11,578 --> 00:24:13,373 Which one of you did that? 469 00:24:15,536 --> 00:24:17,663 Just put the joint down, kid. 470 00:24:17,736 --> 00:24:19,301 Just give me a light, old man, 471 00:24:19,366 --> 00:24:21,592 or I'll tell my dad you put your hand on my knee. 472 00:24:26,227 --> 00:24:29,463 Enough about Mandy. What's the deal with your friend Eric? 473 00:24:29,527 --> 00:24:31,052 Eric? I mean, Eric's the best. 474 00:24:31,125 --> 00:24:34,352 He's got good values, smart, loyal. 475 00:24:34,425 --> 00:24:37,752 I highly recommend him, although right now he's probably mad at me 476 00:24:37,806 --> 00:24:40,051 because he thinks I'm out here working you. 477 00:24:40,096 --> 00:24:41,161 What, you didn't tell him 478 00:24:41,218 --> 00:24:43,911 - I don't date actors? - How would I know that? 479 00:24:43,986 --> 00:24:47,082 I told you that at the Christmas party when you were working me. 480 00:24:47,145 --> 00:24:49,040 Really? Was I? 481 00:24:49,116 --> 00:24:49,791 Come on. 482 00:24:52,195 --> 00:24:52,891 Hello? 483 00:24:53,477 --> 00:24:55,673 Cheer up, E. It's a celebration. 484 00:24:55,748 --> 00:24:57,871 - Where's Vince? - He disappeared with Sloan. 485 00:24:57,945 --> 00:24:59,571 Probably at the tennis courts. 486 00:24:59,638 --> 00:25:01,971 I hear that's where you fuck at the Beverly Hilton. 487 00:25:02,035 --> 00:25:04,630 The fact that he went after this girl purely out of spite, 488 00:25:04,708 --> 00:25:07,331 - I may never speak to him again. - Don't be so overly sensitive. 489 00:25:07,407 --> 00:25:09,590 It's like getting mad at the bull for giving you the horns 490 00:25:09,667 --> 00:25:11,931 when you shouldn't have been in the ring in the first place. 491 00:25:11,998 --> 00:25:14,491 - Fuck you guys for encouraging him. - Come on, Turtle, 492 00:25:14,565 --> 00:25:16,761 - let's go work the waitress staff. - No, fuck that. 493 00:25:16,828 --> 00:25:18,850 They just wheeled out the dessert cart. 494 00:25:18,927 --> 00:25:20,890 Do-it-yourself sundaes? Oh, man. 495 00:25:20,938 --> 00:25:21,903 Sprinkles. 496 00:25:28,116 --> 00:25:30,613 - Hey. - Hey! 497 00:25:30,686 --> 00:25:32,283 Where's Vince? 498 00:25:32,345 --> 00:25:34,742 Oh, he got a phone call from Mandy and he left. 499 00:25:34,815 --> 00:25:37,610 - You're kidding me. - He said you'd react that way. 500 00:25:37,685 --> 00:25:39,412 But you gotta stop worrying about him. 501 00:25:39,477 --> 00:25:41,171 What else did he say? 502 00:25:41,248 --> 00:25:42,772 He said that you're a great guy 503 00:25:44,007 --> 00:25:46,900 and that you've been his best friend his whole life, 504 00:25:46,976 --> 00:25:49,802 and that I should just drag you onto the dance floor. 505 00:25:52,107 --> 00:25:54,502 Come on, it's a slow song. 506 00:26:19,487 --> 00:26:22,642 I was a little surprised that you called. What's going on? 507 00:26:22,717 --> 00:26:26,370 I... I wanted to tell you 508 00:26:26,447 --> 00:26:28,810 that Chris and I are gonna be taking a little break. 509 00:26:28,878 --> 00:26:31,242 Aw, that's too bad. 510 00:26:31,305 --> 00:26:34,543 Look, you know, if you need a friend, of course I'll be there-- 511 00:26:34,607 --> 00:26:38,162 Vince, I have enough friends. 512 00:26:38,238 --> 00:26:41,031 The truth is-- If we're being upfront with one another... 513 00:26:42,807 --> 00:26:44,093 I'm not over you either. 514 00:26:45,485 --> 00:26:47,390 - Really? - Really. 515 00:26:50,355 --> 00:26:53,932 You wanna go get a cup of coffee and talk about it? 516 00:27:03,517 --> 00:27:06,952 Subtitles: Scorpion ==$$== 517 00:27:08,806 --> 00:27:10,352 Was that Vince? 518 00:27:10,508 --> 00:27:11,943 Was that Mandy?