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Previously on
Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce...
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I'm starting a line--
Infant Fabuleux...
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- I love it.
- ...Fine jewelry for infants.
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00:00:09,468 --> 00:00:11,185
- Brilliant.
- Why don't you figure out
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00:00:11,303 --> 00:00:13,687
- what's making you so angry?
- That makes me angry.
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Stop telling me I'm angry.
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00:00:15,941 --> 00:00:17,858
Associates
don't reschedule meetings.
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00:00:17,943 --> 00:00:19,894
It is a shame
that your kids come first.
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Am I in trouble?
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The rules in the school
handbook are very clear.
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Parent volunteers
may not send a proxy.
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The caseworker's
coming tonight.
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Treat this dinner
like any other, okay?
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- Oh!
- Mom!
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- It's okay.
- No, it's not.
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I looked like an idiot.
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We had a deal--no others
until they're significant.
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Maybe she is.
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Did it ever occur to you
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that maybe Becca
is significant to me?
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- Back-burner Baby.
- What?
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It's the thing
in the mommy market right now.
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Cleo Stevens is
a real inspiration.
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Uh, one rule,
more time for yourself.
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I mean, otherwise
you're just going to have
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a nervous breakdown
like Abby McCarthy.
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I think that bitch
just stepped to me.
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_
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♪ Why is everything
black and white? ♪
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Jesus, woman.
I told you I wanted to work out,
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- but you're killing me!
- What?
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If you want to get your steps
over 14,000, come on.
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- Are you a Fitbit person?
- Hell, yeah, I am.
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I have to be stepping
everything up right now.
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You know, this whole
Cleo Stevens thing.
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Back-burner bitch?
Screw her.
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She made me the laughingstock
of the mommy lit world, so...
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- No.
- That is totally true.
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Right?
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Yes, and now I have to present
a whole new me to my editors.
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Delia's got me
on this cleanse,
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and I just got
to be focused and clear
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and undeniable.
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I've got something that will
get your undeniable
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juices flowing--
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Vegas.
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- Yes.
- That is not now I thought
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that sentence
was going to end.
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Delia and I are going
this weekend.
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It's my big photo shoot
for Infant Fabuleux,
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and it's the baby styles
convention, which...
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- Oh. No.
- No?
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No. I am persona non grata
at that thing now.
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Oh, come on, you won't
even know it's happening.
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It's gonna be all style,
no baby,
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and you can work there
by the pool.
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- Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
- And I will be working too.
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And when we're not working,
we're gonna be wiggling.
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We can wiggle, wiggle, wiggle.
We can wiggle.
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You know what?
Oh, my God.
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- We can wiggle, wiggle--
- You know you want to.
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I'm so sorry.
You guys wiggle.
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But I actually have
a career to save, so...
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- Okay.
- Invite Lyla.
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She loves Vegas.
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Wow. That is not how I thought
that sentence was gonna end.
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Come on, pick it up, pick it up.
Let's go. Let's go.
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Let's do it.
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
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- Push it.
- Oh, my God.
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Push it.
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Sync & corrections by Alice
www.addic7ed.com
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♪ Why is everything
black and white? ♪
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Oh!
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That was a workout.
Amazing.
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Yeah.
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It was great.
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Yeah, that was great?
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It was a little more than great.
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I know, just-- it's always
so physical, you know?
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Yes.
It's sex.
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By definition, physical.
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No, I mean...
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We've never really
made love, you know?
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No, I don't know.
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Really?
Come on.
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Hold on.
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Like, when your hearts
are open,
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and it's not just
two bodies connecting.
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It--it's emotional.
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- It's deep.
- Yeah.
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You've never felt
like that before?
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Sure I have.
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I mean, we're still new.
We'll get there.
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Well, I feel it for you.
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I guess I'm just
not getting it back.
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No, no, hey, come here,
come here, come here, come here.
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Come here.
Hey.
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Hey.
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We're--we're great together.
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Let's not overthink it.
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It's not
about thinking, Jake.
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It's about--
It's about feeling.
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Look, I know you have
so much going on right now,
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but you're really
emotionally blocked.
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- I know.
- I have this guy.
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It sounds lame, but he's really
helped me just let go
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of a lot of stuff.
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Your shrink?
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Like a shaman.
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I know.
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Look, I...
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I need this from you.
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Please.
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Okay.
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Fine.
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So I'm thinking
that my next book will be...
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Private School Confidential--
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Rules of navigating
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the shark-infested waters
of the poshest private schools
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in the country.
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You would not believe
what goes on at these places.
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I'm telling you, it's--
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I don't even know why somebody
hasn't done this already.
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What are you looking for?
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Sorry.
Salt junkie.
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Yeah, it really adds taste.
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I'm sure it's just me being
lame and hungover,
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but how is that not just
another Girlfriends' Guide?
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Uh, for one thing,
it's not about me or my family.
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Uh, but it's still in my zone.
It's the parenting market.
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Abby, no offense, but
readers don't want your advice
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about anything
parenting related,
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not anymore.
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Lightbulb, what about divorce?
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That's an area you could write
the crap out of.
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Yeah, I could do that.
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Or I could just
slit my wrists
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and write about what it
feels like to bleed out.
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Exactly.
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00:05:47,439 --> 00:05:48,839
It's what makes
your books so great.
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00:05:48,890 --> 00:05:50,390
I mean, you take on changes
in life,
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and you're so witty
and self-deprecating.
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Yes, but this is divorce.
This is painful and sad.
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And no one wants to read
about it.
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I don't know.
People like dark.
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00:06:02,287 --> 00:06:05,572
Cleo Stevens is pretty dark,
and it's working for her.
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00:06:05,707 --> 00:06:09,293
So we are rocking the park
when Neo says she's hungry.
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I just reach
into my designer diaper bag
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and pull out
some homemade organic baby food.
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Yeah, right.
Who am I--Abby McCarthy?
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Hell, no.
I forgot the frickin' baby food.
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But I didn't forget
my delicious turkey sub.
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"Momhood" does not have to be
that hard.
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Watch me make baby food.
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Mmm.
Mmm, mmm, mmm.
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Mmm.
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Mm-hmm.
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ABC turkey.
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- Choo, Choo, Choo, Choo, Choo.
- Ew.
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Okay, first of all,
Missy trashed my book idea
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and told me
I should write about divorce.
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- Too soon.
- This is what I'm saying.
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Then I watch another
Cleo Stevens clip.
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- Please stop doing that.
- I know, I know, I know.
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I'm torturing myself.
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Maybe I should get out of town.
Are you going to Vegas?
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- Vegas? Are you?
- You know Phoebe--
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She's doing
the whole baby-style event,
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00:07:01,513 --> 00:07:04,298
which we can avoid, right?
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00:07:04,432 --> 00:07:05,716
Yeah.
So--so you guys are--
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I really need to not
be alone,
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00:07:08,720 --> 00:07:10,938
and you could really use
the distraction.
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And just don't let the fact
that Delia's coming bother you.
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Yeah, I, um--
I wouldn't let that stop me.
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Perfect.
I'm in if you're in.
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Wow.
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00:07:23,368 --> 00:07:24,701
- Dear lord.
- Yeah.
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00:07:24,819 --> 00:07:26,153
How high are you guys
planning on getting?
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00:07:26,321 --> 00:07:28,822
I know. Pot dispensaries
are like target for stoners.
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You cannot leave without
spending less than $200.
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Oh, I am going lollipop.
Slow and steady.
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Pot goldfish are not
on my cleanse.
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And anyway, I'm not going
to party this weekend.
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I'm just gonna do
some spa time, chill by the pool
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with my Kindle, mellow Vegas...
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00:07:45,557 --> 00:07:47,407
Wait for a book idea
to bubble up.
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00:07:47,508 --> 00:07:50,010
"Mellow" and "Vegas"--
That sounds like an oxymoron.
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- Fun.
- Yeah, that's my plan.
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00:07:53,147 --> 00:07:55,265
In case it's, like,
right on the end...
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00:07:55,400 --> 00:07:56,934
You know what
I'm talking about?
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00:07:57,068 --> 00:07:58,188
It's so bad, it's so good.
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- Wait.
- Hello, ladies.
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00:07:59,904 --> 00:08:01,989
- Hi.
- Lyla, what are you doing here?
194
00:08:02,106 --> 00:08:04,691
Well, Abby mentioned it.
195
00:08:04,859 --> 00:08:07,662
Last one in the car
is a rotten friend.
196
00:08:15,265 --> 00:08:16,432
Oh, my God.
197
00:08:16,516 --> 00:08:18,016
You should have told me
you weren't inviting her.
198
00:08:18,134 --> 00:08:19,518
I know I should have.
199
00:08:19,636 --> 00:08:20,969
It's just everything has been
so difficult with her recently.
200
00:08:21,137 --> 00:08:22,137
And with the photo shoot,
201
00:08:22,222 --> 00:08:24,106
a fight is the last thing
I needed.
202
00:08:24,224 --> 00:08:26,141
- And she hates me.
- Yeah.
203
00:08:26,309 --> 00:08:27,643
She does, I'm sorry.
204
00:08:27,777 --> 00:08:29,645
But look, she's going through
a hideous custody battle.
205
00:08:29,813 --> 00:08:30,979
- I know.
- She's on pins and needles
206
00:08:31,147 --> 00:08:32,231
about the caseworker's report.
207
00:08:32,315 --> 00:08:34,950
I mean, maybe this trip
is exactly what she needs.
208
00:08:35,568 --> 00:08:37,986
Or maybe this trip
is exactly what she needs.
209
00:08:38,154 --> 00:08:40,238
- No.
- Oh, yes.
210
00:08:40,356 --> 00:08:42,157
Oh, yes.
211
00:08:42,325 --> 00:08:45,160
♪ Oh, yes, it is,
goldfish ♪
212
00:08:45,294 --> 00:08:49,381
Lion's breath.
Everyone, breathe in.
213
00:08:49,498 --> 00:08:51,132
And...
214
00:09:02,094 --> 00:09:04,980
Now, the breath can be
a bit odd,
215
00:09:05,097 --> 00:09:06,681
you know, showing off
all your bad dental work.
216
00:09:06,849 --> 00:09:08,933
Maybe that's just
if you're English.
217
00:09:09,068 --> 00:09:10,518
And that's why
we're here, yeah?
218
00:09:10,686 --> 00:09:13,855
Break through the inhibitions.
Let the truth come forward.
219
00:09:13,990 --> 00:09:16,858
But are we prepared
for our journey
220
00:09:17,026 --> 00:09:20,078
to self-revelation
through ayahuasca.
221
00:09:20,196 --> 00:09:23,498
I totally googled it,
and there's conflicting reports
222
00:09:23,582 --> 00:09:27,369
about the possibilities
of, um, you know, death.
223
00:09:27,503 --> 00:09:28,787
Of course.
224
00:09:28,871 --> 00:09:30,872
It's a completely natural herb,
ancient, opens your heart.
225
00:09:31,040 --> 00:09:32,507
I-I'm just prone
to allergies,
226
00:09:32,591 --> 00:09:34,191
so I'm just making sure.
Do you know CPR?
227
00:09:34,293 --> 00:09:36,211
- Absolutely.
- Don't be worried.
228
00:09:36,345 --> 00:09:37,825
Taken correctly,
it's completely safe.
229
00:09:37,847 --> 00:09:39,964
- Great.
- Now, to be fully prepared,
230
00:09:40,099 --> 00:09:42,384
we must fast, yeah?
231
00:09:42,551 --> 00:09:45,937
I'm sorry.
What--prepared to trip?
232
00:09:46,055 --> 00:09:48,523
- Prepared to trip balls?
- It's gonna be totally fine.
233
00:09:48,641 --> 00:09:50,041
I promise.
I'm just-the distinction.
234
00:09:50,109 --> 00:09:52,277
I'm just asking.
I'm just asking.
235
00:09:52,395 --> 00:09:53,611
- Are we good?
- Yeah.
236
00:09:53,729 --> 00:09:54,863
Yeah, you checked in
or checked out?
237
00:09:54,980 --> 00:09:56,731
In.
I mean, look at this face.
238
00:09:56,816 --> 00:09:58,733
I'm checked in.
239
00:09:58,901 --> 00:10:01,486
Great. Now, okay,
before we are imbibing,
240
00:10:01,620 --> 00:10:04,322
we need to cleanse the body,
cleanse the mind,
241
00:10:04,457 --> 00:10:06,875
12 hours of fasting
242
00:10:06,992 --> 00:10:10,161
to purify the body,
243
00:10:10,296 --> 00:10:13,214
purify the spirit.
244
00:10:13,332 --> 00:10:15,500
You'll be so thankful
for an empty belly
245
00:10:15,634 --> 00:10:17,886
once the vomiting starts.
246
00:10:20,172 --> 00:10:22,090
I'm so high.
247
00:10:22,174 --> 00:10:23,975
My cheeks are--
Ohm.
248
00:10:24,093 --> 00:10:25,427
It's like
pins and needle dome.
249
00:10:25,561 --> 00:10:27,512
- Ohm to the dome.
- Ohm.
250
00:10:27,646 --> 00:10:29,097
Guys, can you just
keep it down a little bit?
251
00:10:29,265 --> 00:10:30,515
I have a horrible headache.
252
00:10:30,599 --> 00:10:31,959
'Cause you're reading
in the car.
253
00:10:31,984 --> 00:10:33,685
You're reading in the car.
254
00:10:33,819 --> 00:10:37,605
But here--you know, I think
if you annunciated "ohm,"
255
00:10:37,773 --> 00:10:40,408
it could alleviate...
256
00:10:40,526 --> 00:10:43,027
Ohm.
257
00:10:43,162 --> 00:10:44,279
No.
258
00:10:44,413 --> 00:10:48,083
Lyla, Lyla, loo-loo, Lyla.
Lyla, I love you.
259
00:10:48,167 --> 00:10:50,285
I love your little face.
260
00:10:50,453 --> 00:10:52,333
I love you too,
but the whole custody thing is--
261
00:10:52,338 --> 00:10:54,289
It is driving me nuts.
262
00:10:54,423 --> 00:10:56,624
Lyla, we are totally
going to distract you.
263
00:10:56,759 --> 00:10:58,259
Vegas is the best.
264
00:10:58,377 --> 00:11:01,880
You want a little fishy
in your mouth, Abby?
265
00:11:01,964 --> 00:11:03,798
Look at the little fishy
come into your mouth?
266
00:11:03,883 --> 00:11:05,300
- Abby.
- It wants to have a little home
267
00:11:05,434 --> 00:11:06,518
in your mouth.
Fishy.
268
00:11:06,635 --> 00:11:08,636
- Come on.
- You guys, I'm working.
269
00:11:08,804 --> 00:11:10,305
But you're not working.
You're not.
270
00:11:10,389 --> 00:11:12,190
You're reading
Cleo's YouTube channel.
271
00:11:12,308 --> 00:11:13,942
No!
Is that what you're doing now?
272
00:11:14,059 --> 00:11:15,059
- That's not working.
- See?
273
00:11:15,194 --> 00:11:16,978
Oh, my God.
Why would you do that?
274
00:11:17,146 --> 00:11:19,814
"Abby McCarthy is
a lying, slutty, old hag
275
00:11:19,949 --> 00:11:20,982
who needs Botox."
276
00:11:21,150 --> 00:11:22,650
Doesn't even make sense.
277
00:11:22,818 --> 00:11:27,288
How can you be
"a slutty, old hag"?
278
00:11:27,406 --> 00:11:29,157
No one would want to sleep
with you.
279
00:11:29,325 --> 00:11:30,525
That's your takeaway
from that.
280
00:11:30,576 --> 00:11:32,827
- Well, actually--
- Hang on one second.
281
00:11:32,962 --> 00:11:34,245
That's not at all--
282
00:11:34,380 --> 00:11:35,663
Guys, you know what?
Stoned--stoned--
283
00:11:35,798 --> 00:11:37,398
Secondly, there's someone
for everyone.
284
00:11:37,416 --> 00:11:40,135
Stoned conversations
are only funny to stoned people.
285
00:11:40,252 --> 00:11:42,504
Sexuality is fluid.
She's being an ageist.
286
00:11:42,588 --> 00:11:45,006
She's also being unkind
to her own gender
287
00:11:45,174 --> 00:11:46,591
for not taking issue--
288
00:11:56,569 --> 00:11:59,354
Oh. Oh, my!
Oh, my!
289
00:11:59,522 --> 00:12:02,357
Hello, hello, hello.
290
00:12:02,491 --> 00:12:03,942
Show us the way
to the VIP sundeck,
291
00:12:04,076 --> 00:12:07,862
will you, doll face?
292
00:12:08,030 --> 00:12:10,198
We need a drink.
293
00:12:10,332 --> 00:12:11,972
- Abby, do you want a drink?
- Oh, my God.
294
00:12:12,034 --> 00:12:13,201
Oh, sorry.
295
00:12:13,335 --> 00:12:16,871
No.
I just want a lemon water
296
00:12:17,006 --> 00:12:19,207
with cayenne.
297
00:12:19,341 --> 00:12:22,544
- Oh, my God.
- Four hibiscus margaritas
298
00:12:22,678 --> 00:12:23,878
coming up.
No, no, no, no.
299
00:12:23,963 --> 00:12:26,047
I really do want
a lemon water with the cayenne.
300
00:12:26,215 --> 00:12:27,632
Abby, darling, I am not
gonna get you that.
301
00:12:27,766 --> 00:12:29,267
You created this monster.
302
00:12:29,385 --> 00:12:30,665
I didn't mean
for this weekend.
303
00:12:30,686 --> 00:12:33,555
Hey, Delia, look, drinks
are coming to us.
304
00:12:33,689 --> 00:12:35,056
Are those girls wearing wigs?
Yes, they are.
305
00:12:35,191 --> 00:12:37,475
- Chardonnay or Pinot?
- Oh, yeah.
306
00:12:37,610 --> 00:12:40,728
Thank you.
307
00:12:40,813 --> 00:12:43,481
It's mommy's special medicine,
courtesy of Cleo Stevens.
308
00:12:43,566 --> 00:12:46,150
She's celebrating her new book,
Back-burner Baby.
309
00:12:46,235 --> 00:12:48,403
And she's doing a book signing
tomorrow morning.
310
00:12:48,571 --> 00:12:49,787
- Here, take an invite.
- No, thank you.
311
00:12:49,905 --> 00:12:51,990
- No, thank you.
- Absolutely not.
312
00:12:52,124 --> 00:12:53,791
I'm so sorry, Abby.
It's not your fault.
313
00:12:53,909 --> 00:12:55,210
I should have thought--
Of course she's here.
314
00:12:55,294 --> 00:12:57,545
She's got a book
to promote.
315
00:12:57,630 --> 00:13:00,999
And she's doing
the opening speech?
316
00:13:01,083 --> 00:13:03,801
- After one book--
- Oh, honey, take a break.
317
00:13:03,919 --> 00:13:06,387
Have a Baba.
I am not having a Baba.
318
00:13:06,472 --> 00:13:07,972
I'm just gonna go up to
the room,
319
00:13:08,090 --> 00:13:10,592
and I'm going to cleanse
quietly by myself.
320
00:13:10,726 --> 00:13:12,227
You guys enjoy, really.
Have fun.
321
00:13:12,344 --> 00:13:14,429
Have fun.
322
00:13:19,485 --> 00:13:21,569
- This is weirdly satisfying.
- It's good.
323
00:13:21,687 --> 00:13:24,022
- That Cleo bitch is a genius.
- Mmm.
324
00:13:26,492 --> 00:13:28,276
Mmm.
325
00:13:28,410 --> 00:13:31,946
Oh, my God.
This place is insane.
326
00:13:32,114 --> 00:13:34,916
After our treatments, we have
to try this arctic ice room.
327
00:13:35,034 --> 00:13:36,618
- It snows.
- No way.
328
00:13:36,752 --> 00:13:38,703
It's really good
for tightening your pores...
329
00:13:38,837 --> 00:13:41,623
And for people
who can't chill out.
330
00:13:41,757 --> 00:13:43,458
No report yet?
331
00:13:43,626 --> 00:13:44,626
You know how it is.
332
00:13:44,677 --> 00:13:45,957
This stuff
goes on and on and on.
333
00:13:45,961 --> 00:13:47,095
- Lyla, it's gonna be fine.
- I know.
334
00:13:47,179 --> 00:13:49,097
And if it isn't,
the firm will make sure it is.
335
00:13:49,214 --> 00:13:50,765
- Blow me.
- Abby.
336
00:13:50,883 --> 00:13:52,767
- God, this is so ridiculous.
- Oh, my God.
337
00:13:52,885 --> 00:13:54,405
I'm telling you,
you have to hear this.
338
00:13:54,436 --> 00:13:56,971
This is such bullshit.
Listen to this.
339
00:13:57,106 --> 00:13:59,357
"Bath time--it's exhausting,
340
00:13:59,475 --> 00:14:01,809
"and it conflicts with mama's
chance to get her wine on,
341
00:14:01,977 --> 00:14:03,394
"so skip it.
342
00:14:03,529 --> 00:14:05,563
"If you're washing your kid's
hair more than once a week,
343
00:14:05,698 --> 00:14:07,699
no wonder you're too cranky
to lather up your husband."
344
00:14:07,816 --> 00:14:10,618
Yes, she's filthy, but you
cannot let it get to you.
345
00:14:10,736 --> 00:14:12,896
Just give me the iPad.
Just hand me the iPad right now.
346
00:14:12,955 --> 00:14:15,823
Just give me the iPad.
Can you please keep it down?
347
00:14:15,958 --> 00:14:17,825
- This is the quiet room.
- Sorry...
348
00:14:17,960 --> 00:14:19,827
- Sorry.
- ...We're not quiet.
349
00:14:19,995 --> 00:14:22,330
- And that book saved my life.
- Really?
350
00:14:22,464 --> 00:14:23,831
- Oh, my God.
- Jesus Christ.
351
00:14:23,966 --> 00:14:27,502
I'm so curious.
Which chapter spoke to you?
352
00:14:27,670 --> 00:14:30,254
Was it perhaps
"Brush Off Brushing Teeth"?
353
00:14:30,389 --> 00:14:32,640
Excuse me, ma'am.
This is the third time.
354
00:14:32,758 --> 00:14:34,118
I'm gonna have to ask you
to leave.
355
00:14:34,143 --> 00:14:35,743
I'm not leaving
because I'm not gonna let
356
00:14:35,811 --> 00:14:38,229
some Cleo Stevens groupie
steal my massage.
357
00:14:38,347 --> 00:14:41,933
Oh, my God.
Are you Abby McCarthy?
358
00:14:42,067 --> 00:14:43,935
- Okay, we're going.
- Time to go.
359
00:14:44,019 --> 00:14:45,219
- Sorry.
- I will have you know
360
00:14:45,237 --> 00:14:48,189
that your hero is an advocate
for child abuse.
361
00:14:48,357 --> 00:14:50,658
Relax!
Or we'll waterboard you.
362
00:14:50,776 --> 00:14:52,660
You must stop taking
everything so seriously.
363
00:14:52,778 --> 00:14:55,113
- I hate this cleanse.
- Abby.
364
00:14:55,247 --> 00:14:57,949
- Mellow Vegas, not happening.
- It is not happening.
365
00:14:58,083 --> 00:15:00,368
- No.
- I can't do it anymore.
366
00:15:00,502 --> 00:15:02,286
My head feels like it has
bees in it.
367
00:15:02,421 --> 00:15:04,172
No more cleanse,
no more reflection.
368
00:15:04,289 --> 00:15:06,090
You need real Vegas.
The one with the good times.
369
00:15:06,208 --> 00:15:07,768
Yeah. The one where
you're not ruining
370
00:15:07,793 --> 00:15:10,545
everybody else's good time.
Can you do that?
371
00:15:10,679 --> 00:15:12,013
I'm so sorry.
372
00:15:12,097 --> 00:15:14,382
I'm done with my Cleo obsession,
I promise.
373
00:15:14,516 --> 00:15:15,633
- Let's do it.
- Yes.
374
00:15:15,768 --> 00:15:18,603
Ladies, let's tear it up.
375
00:15:32,151 --> 00:15:34,369
Cheers!
376
00:15:34,486 --> 00:15:37,205
Cheers, yes!
377
00:15:39,575 --> 00:15:41,242
Abby, Abby, Abby, Abby.
378
00:15:41,377 --> 00:15:43,327
That is tequila
and champagne.
379
00:15:43,462 --> 00:15:44,862
You've been detoxing
for three days,
380
00:15:44,880 --> 00:15:46,330
so your liver's like
a little virgin.
381
00:15:46,465 --> 00:15:49,083
Now I am retoxing.
382
00:15:49,251 --> 00:15:51,135
And I am reengaging.
383
00:15:51,253 --> 00:15:53,087
I am so sorry
that I have been so gone.
384
00:15:53,255 --> 00:15:55,890
Lyla, what's happening
with the custody?
385
00:15:55,974 --> 00:15:57,809
No, we're not talking
about that.
386
00:15:57,926 --> 00:16:00,895
Got it.
Lyla...
387
00:16:00,979 --> 00:16:03,398
- We need to get you laid.
- Oh, my God, yes.
388
00:16:03,515 --> 00:16:06,317
Dan doesn't count, because
that was a felonious lay.
389
00:16:06,435 --> 00:16:09,153
- Felonious?
- Lyla, are you not having sex?
390
00:16:09,271 --> 00:16:12,073
- Oh, please.
- Lyla...
391
00:16:12,191 --> 00:16:13,908
Talk about why you two
hate each other exactly.
392
00:16:13,992 --> 00:16:15,777
I don't--we don't hate
each other.
393
00:16:15,911 --> 00:16:17,995
- We don't.
- Got off on the wrong foot?
394
00:16:18,113 --> 00:16:19,414
Agreed.
She threatened me.
395
00:16:19,531 --> 00:16:20,581
I threatened her.
Next subject.
396
00:16:20,699 --> 00:16:22,667
- Phoebe.
- Yes?
397
00:16:22,785 --> 00:16:25,953
Ad shoot--
Do you need any help
398
00:16:26,121 --> 00:16:27,422
with the model babies
in the morning?
399
00:16:27,539 --> 00:16:28,673
Yes, I do,
400
00:16:28,791 --> 00:16:30,708
because I'm styling
the entire thing myself.
401
00:16:30,843 --> 00:16:32,210
- Wow.
- So, yes, will you come?
402
00:16:32,344 --> 00:16:34,796
I'm there.
I mean, what else am I gonna do?
403
00:16:34,930 --> 00:16:37,799
Am I gonna go to Cleo Stevens'
book signing?
404
00:16:39,518 --> 00:16:41,469
Merman!
405
00:16:41,603 --> 00:16:44,105
My merman, can I have
another "sagebush"?
406
00:16:44,223 --> 00:16:45,807
Sagebrush.
Sage--
407
00:16:45,941 --> 00:16:47,692
Didn't you know
he was a merman?
408
00:16:47,810 --> 00:16:49,777
Do you know that he has a tail?
It's a secret.
409
00:16:49,895 --> 00:16:51,646
I think the merman
thinks that you've had enough.
410
00:16:51,814 --> 00:16:53,064
You need to eat.
411
00:16:53,198 --> 00:16:54,649
- Can you bring some water?
- You need to eat something.
412
00:16:54,733 --> 00:16:56,573
- Oh, good idea.
- You didn't lay a bread base.
413
00:16:56,652 --> 00:16:58,486
- Yeah.
- Oh, my God.
414
00:16:58,620 --> 00:17:00,822
Mellow Vegas was so boring.
415
00:17:00,956 --> 00:17:03,658
I want party Vegas.
416
00:17:03,792 --> 00:17:06,577
Party Vegas!
Yeah. Cheers to that!
417
00:17:06,712 --> 00:17:09,413
- Cheers!
- Whoo!
418
00:17:12,634 --> 00:17:15,086
I'm ruining our trip.
419
00:17:17,745 --> 00:17:20,113
I'm a party downer...
420
00:17:20,281 --> 00:17:22,031
And a social-media pariah.
421
00:17:22,166 --> 00:17:24,501
Ladies, this is Las Vegas.
422
00:17:25,118 --> 00:17:27,203
We just need a new plan
of attack.
423
00:17:27,371 --> 00:17:31,074
- We could play slots.
- Slots? No.
424
00:17:31,208 --> 00:17:33,626
- Whoo-hoo-hoo!
- Come on, baby!
425
00:17:33,761 --> 00:17:36,463
Come on, come on, come on.
Let's see it, let's see it.
426
00:17:36,597 --> 00:17:38,548
- And dealer gets 17.
- Oh, my goodness.
427
00:17:38,682 --> 00:17:40,633
That's good!
428
00:17:40,718 --> 00:17:43,686
Boom!
Five, five in a row.
429
00:17:43,804 --> 00:17:45,555
Five in a row.
That is exciting.
430
00:17:45,689 --> 00:17:47,223
- Yes!
- Yes!
431
00:17:47,308 --> 00:17:48,308
It can't last.
432
00:17:48,392 --> 00:17:50,727
Oh, free massage.
Free massage.
433
00:17:50,861 --> 00:17:53,029
Bet, please.
Are you not going to bet?
434
00:17:53,147 --> 00:17:56,149
No, aforementioned
career crisis.
435
00:17:56,283 --> 00:17:57,817
What? don't stop.
436
00:17:57,952 --> 00:17:59,736
I don't know if they'll let
you sit here if you don't bet.
437
00:17:59,870 --> 00:18:01,955
I will ride along.
438
00:18:02,039 --> 00:18:04,491
Whoo.
Abby is high-rolling with $100.
439
00:18:04,658 --> 00:18:07,460
I know.
I can't handle it.
440
00:18:07,578 --> 00:18:11,331
13?
Who gets 13?
441
00:18:11,465 --> 00:18:12,582
Oh, my God.
My stomach just dropped.
442
00:18:12,716 --> 00:18:14,467
I'll stay.
Dealer's got a Jack.
443
00:18:14,585 --> 00:18:15,885
I'll, uh, hit, hit.
444
00:18:16,003 --> 00:18:17,504
- 23.
- What?
445
00:18:17,588 --> 00:18:19,422
Boom!
There goes summer camp.
446
00:18:19,557 --> 00:18:20,557
Oh.
447
00:18:20,591 --> 00:18:21,891
- How is this fun?
- It isn't.
448
00:18:22,009 --> 00:18:24,143
You just got to be stoic.
Game face. Stoic.
449
00:18:24,261 --> 00:18:25,929
I'm riding along
with you, Phoebe.
450
00:18:26,063 --> 00:18:27,063
I'll go one more.
451
00:18:34,404 --> 00:18:37,573
Do you feel anything?
452
00:18:37,908 --> 00:18:39,742
Maybe he didn't give me enough.
453
00:18:39,860 --> 00:18:42,528
I feel seasick.
454
00:18:42,662 --> 00:18:44,497
Maybe this was a mistake.
455
00:18:46,366 --> 00:18:48,918
Hey, why did you have
to kill Cassidy?
456
00:18:49,036 --> 00:18:51,203
He loved you, Deedee.
457
00:18:51,338 --> 00:18:55,374
Deedee's just a character
I play on TV.
458
00:18:55,459 --> 00:18:58,210
Becca.
459
00:18:58,378 --> 00:18:59,762
She doesn't exist.
460
00:19:05,852 --> 00:19:07,269
She doesn't exist.
461
00:19:07,387 --> 00:19:09,388
You know.
462
00:19:10,891 --> 00:19:14,226
You know.
463
00:19:16,947 --> 00:19:21,067
I just want to direct.
464
00:19:21,201 --> 00:19:23,319
I want to direct!
465
00:19:25,539 --> 00:19:26,906
- Oh!
- Come on, no!
466
00:19:27,040 --> 00:19:28,124
- Come on!
- No!
467
00:19:28,242 --> 00:19:29,575
Come on.
468
00:19:29,710 --> 00:19:30,710
- And 21.
- No!
469
00:19:30,794 --> 00:19:31,794
- I hate you.
- Come on.
470
00:19:31,829 --> 00:19:33,746
UNICEF
could've just built a school
471
00:19:33,881 --> 00:19:35,581
with the money we lost
at this table.
472
00:19:35,716 --> 00:19:36,883
That is so crazy.
473
00:19:37,000 --> 00:19:39,001
- Why would you do that?
- You okay?
474
00:19:39,169 --> 00:19:40,887
Do you want to, like, go up
to the suite, maybe take a nap?
475
00:19:41,004 --> 00:19:42,004
What?
476
00:19:42,005 --> 00:19:43,589
Do you need to take--
Take a break,
477
00:19:43,724 --> 00:19:46,676
go up to the suite, and, like,
just decompress or something?
478
00:19:46,844 --> 00:19:48,227
You're voting me
off the island.
479
00:19:48,345 --> 00:19:50,012
- I am not.
- Enjoy the warm towels, Abby.
480
00:19:50,180 --> 00:19:52,682
- I have to go anyways, so...
- No, it's fine.
481
00:19:52,766 --> 00:19:54,150
I'll go.
I'm gonna go.
482
00:19:54,268 --> 00:19:55,518
Do you want somebody
to go with you?
483
00:19:55,652 --> 00:19:56,652
No.
484
00:19:56,653 --> 00:19:57,737
- I'm fine.
- No, I take that.
485
00:19:57,855 --> 00:19:59,655
That's, like,
two mortgage payments.
486
00:19:59,773 --> 00:20:02,191
Ugh.
487
00:20:09,416 --> 00:20:11,701
- Another win for you.
- Thank you.
488
00:20:11,869 --> 00:20:14,120
Thank you.
This is--this is crazy.
489
00:20:14,254 --> 00:20:17,840
Can you count or something?
490
00:20:17,925 --> 00:20:19,876
Am I cheating?
Is that what you're saying?
491
00:20:20,043 --> 00:20:22,178
Absolutely not.
492
00:20:22,296 --> 00:20:23,512
Let's just--
Let's just keep it fun.
493
00:20:23,630 --> 00:20:25,264
I would love
to have some fun,
494
00:20:25,382 --> 00:20:26,716
but when you imply
that somehow...
495
00:20:26,850 --> 00:20:28,017
- No, no.
- ...I'm scamming the system
496
00:20:28,135 --> 00:20:29,602
and not legitimately winning.
497
00:20:29,720 --> 00:20:31,520
Let's just...
498
00:20:31,638 --> 00:20:34,273
You know, um...
499
00:20:34,391 --> 00:20:35,831
For a while now,
there is a gentleman
500
00:20:35,893 --> 00:20:39,145
who has been staring at us.
Don't look!
501
00:20:39,279 --> 00:20:42,148
Please don't look.
He--he's coming over.
502
00:20:42,282 --> 00:20:45,868
He's coming over.
No, no, not like that.
503
00:20:45,986 --> 00:20:48,037
Delbar, is that you?
504
00:20:50,958 --> 00:20:53,326
Delbar?
505
00:21:06,757 --> 00:21:08,140
Hey, there.
506
00:21:08,258 --> 00:21:11,260
- Long day?
- Yeah.
507
00:21:11,428 --> 00:21:13,346
Got a name?
508
00:21:13,480 --> 00:21:16,732
Um, Janet Larocca.
509
00:21:16,850 --> 00:21:19,652
- Hey, Janet.
- Hi.
510
00:21:19,770 --> 00:21:22,071
You're a terrific-looking
lady, Janet.
511
00:21:22,155 --> 00:21:24,190
My name's Glen Melnick.
512
00:21:24,324 --> 00:21:26,609
I'm in town
for the eyewear convention.
513
00:21:26,777 --> 00:21:27,777
Oh, yeah?
514
00:21:27,778 --> 00:21:29,662
Lot of new product
to introduce.
515
00:21:29,780 --> 00:21:34,417
My new glasses actually have
X-Ray vision.
516
00:21:34,534 --> 00:21:36,619
I am not wearing
any glasses, Glen,
517
00:21:36,787 --> 00:21:39,705
but I can see you're wearing
a wedding ring.
518
00:21:39,790 --> 00:21:41,841
Yeah, well...
519
00:21:41,959 --> 00:21:43,709
What happens in Vegas...
520
00:21:43,844 --> 00:21:46,429
Hey, beautiful.
521
00:21:46,513 --> 00:21:47,797
What's going on?
You couldn't wait for me?
522
00:21:47,931 --> 00:21:49,515
I...
523
00:21:49,633 --> 00:21:53,352
I was totally waiting for you.
524
00:21:53,470 --> 00:21:54,854
Hey, man.
525
00:21:54,972 --> 00:21:56,222
- How you doing?
- Great.
526
00:21:56,306 --> 00:22:00,443
Um, nice talking
to you, Janet.
527
00:22:00,560 --> 00:22:01,944
No harm, no foul.
528
00:22:04,197 --> 00:22:05,648
Thanks for the rescue.
529
00:22:07,150 --> 00:22:12,121
Um, I was planning
on committing carbo-cide alone.
530
00:22:12,239 --> 00:22:13,439
- You want this back?
- No, no.
531
00:22:13,490 --> 00:22:15,875
I--please rescue me again.
Eat half of it.
532
00:22:15,993 --> 00:22:19,912
- Thank you, Janet.
- It--it's Abby, actually.
533
00:22:20,047 --> 00:22:21,047
And you are?
534
00:22:21,131 --> 00:22:24,300
My name is Carrrl.
535
00:22:24,418 --> 00:22:25,801
Did--did you just purr?
536
00:22:25,919 --> 00:22:27,720
No.
537
00:22:27,838 --> 00:22:31,841
- It's short for Juan-Carlos.
- JuanCarlos.
538
00:22:33,143 --> 00:22:34,393
Join you for a glass
of wine?
539
00:22:34,511 --> 00:22:37,013
Um...
540
00:22:37,180 --> 00:22:39,098
Yes.
541
00:22:39,182 --> 00:22:40,649
The clanging--
It's just so noisy.
542
00:22:40,767 --> 00:22:42,818
- We can't even talk.
- Yes, we can talk.
543
00:22:42,936 --> 00:22:44,854
- We can talk.
- No, I don't think that's-
544
00:22:46,523 --> 00:22:47,523
Is there a problem?
545
00:22:47,607 --> 00:22:50,743
- No. No, I'm good.
- Yes, there is.
546
00:22:50,861 --> 00:22:52,611
Is she your friend?
547
00:22:52,746 --> 00:22:54,663
- Yes.
- Well, then tell her
548
00:22:54,781 --> 00:22:55,948
she should respect
her elders,
549
00:22:56,083 --> 00:22:57,416
the people who sacrificed
for her.
550
00:22:57,534 --> 00:22:59,254
Oh, please.
He gets his check every month.
551
00:22:59,369 --> 00:23:01,670
But you don't speak to him.
552
00:23:01,788 --> 00:23:03,089
She's wrong to judge.
553
00:23:03,206 --> 00:23:05,091
- Her only living parent--
- That's enough.
554
00:23:05,208 --> 00:23:07,209
I'm leaving.
555
00:23:07,344 --> 00:23:08,794
Delbar.
556
00:23:12,866 --> 00:23:14,950
I hate this place.
557
00:23:15,068 --> 00:23:17,069
- I cannot find my room.
- Delia, what is happening?
558
00:23:17,154 --> 00:23:18,154
What's going on?
559
00:23:18,205 --> 00:23:19,739
Delia!
560
00:23:19,873 --> 00:23:21,473
Hey, Lyla,
this is none of your business.
561
00:23:21,491 --> 00:23:23,159
- Was that your uncle?
- I don't know why you think
562
00:23:23,293 --> 00:23:24,744
that I would share
anything personal with you.
563
00:23:24,911 --> 00:23:26,162
You've been nothing
but spiteful to me
564
00:23:26,296 --> 00:23:27,413
ever since I met you.
565
00:23:27,547 --> 00:23:29,632
I was just part
of a very unusual situation.
566
00:23:29,750 --> 00:23:31,217
No, you're not part
of that at all.
567
00:23:31,334 --> 00:23:32,918
- It's none of your business.
- He asked-is that your uncle?
568
00:23:33,053 --> 00:23:34,413
- He asked me--
- I know that you think
569
00:23:34,421 --> 00:23:35,921
that I breezed through life
because I show a little leg,
570
00:23:36,089 --> 00:23:37,890
but you don't know me,
you understand?
571
00:23:38,008 --> 00:23:39,925
And you don't deserve to.
572
00:23:43,313 --> 00:23:44,847
You know why this pizza's
so good?
573
00:23:45,015 --> 00:23:46,816
- Why?
- 'Cause of the wine.
574
00:23:46,934 --> 00:23:48,351
- Because of the wine.
- Yeah.
575
00:23:48,519 --> 00:23:49,519
Yes.
576
00:23:49,653 --> 00:23:51,354
This same pizza
with diet coke,
577
00:23:51,522 --> 00:23:53,322
we would not even be talking
about this pizza.
578
00:23:53,407 --> 00:23:55,287
Not at all. No, it really is
all about the wine.
579
00:23:55,359 --> 00:23:56,943
- Mm-hmm.
- And suddenly
580
00:23:57,077 --> 00:23:58,611
it tastes like you're eating
real Italian pizza.
581
00:23:58,745 --> 00:24:00,863
- In Italy.
- Exactly.
582
00:24:02,199 --> 00:24:04,700
- When were you in Italy?
- Never.
583
00:24:04,868 --> 00:24:06,369
Just trying to impress you.
584
00:24:10,040 --> 00:24:12,175
This is the first--
You are the first good thing
585
00:24:12,259 --> 00:24:15,878
that has happened to me
this weekend.
586
00:24:19,132 --> 00:24:21,684
Um, do you want to get
out of here?
587
00:24:21,802 --> 00:24:24,053
Yeah.
588
00:24:24,221 --> 00:24:26,472
- Absolutely.
- Yeah?
589
00:24:26,607 --> 00:24:30,643
But first we should
probably talk about rates.
590
00:24:31,278 --> 00:24:32,979
I'm sorry.
What?
591
00:24:33,113 --> 00:24:34,947
Not that I wouldn't do it
for free,
592
00:24:35,065 --> 00:24:36,649
but got to make a living.
593
00:24:38,952 --> 00:24:40,903
Oh, my God.
594
00:24:41,071 --> 00:24:43,239
Oh, my God.
595
00:24:43,373 --> 00:24:45,541
You're a gigolo?
596
00:24:45,659 --> 00:24:50,246
Well, I prefer "companion,"
but, yeah.
597
00:24:52,067 --> 00:24:53,917
I'm sorry. Everyone
knows that this is the
598
00:24:53,942 --> 00:24:55,860
place where women go
to look for company.
599
00:24:56,120 --> 00:24:57,537
I am so embarrassed.
600
00:24:57,855 --> 00:25:00,323
Is that why you took down
lenscrafters over here--
601
00:25:00,491 --> 00:25:02,291
- Because he was on your turf?
- No, no, no, no.
602
00:25:02,326 --> 00:25:03,577
You just looked
really uncomfortable.
603
00:25:03,711 --> 00:25:05,078
- I was really uncomfortable.
- Yeah.
604
00:25:05,213 --> 00:25:07,497
And I was hungry.
605
00:25:07,665 --> 00:25:10,584
So, uh, if you're interested,
606
00:25:10,718 --> 00:25:13,053
I won't charge you
for the bar time.
607
00:25:13,171 --> 00:25:16,223
The clock will just
start now.
608
00:25:16,340 --> 00:25:17,591
Um, I don't--
609
00:25:17,725 --> 00:25:19,342
I'm sorry.
I don't mean to be insulting,
610
00:25:19,477 --> 00:25:22,846
but it just seems a little
desperate to pay for it.
611
00:25:22,980 --> 00:25:25,315
You know, Abby, you--
You seem fantastic.
612
00:25:25,433 --> 00:25:26,933
- Thank you.
- And you're gorgeous.
613
00:25:27,068 --> 00:25:28,652
Thank you.
614
00:25:28,769 --> 00:25:32,489
But if this isn't a date,
then...
615
00:25:32,573 --> 00:25:36,743
Oh, uh, right.
You are working.
616
00:25:36,861 --> 00:25:40,997
- This is your job.
- It is.
617
00:25:41,115 --> 00:25:43,834
I mean,
does any woman ever...
618
00:25:43,951 --> 00:25:46,753
Pay you just to talk?
619
00:25:46,871 --> 00:25:49,172
- Yeah, all the time.
- Do I get a discount for that?
620
00:25:49,290 --> 00:25:50,674
Okay, no, that's fine.
621
00:25:50,758 --> 00:25:53,009
Kidding.
622
00:25:52,927 --> 00:25:54,645
But if I did,
I could ask you anything?
623
00:25:54,762 --> 00:25:56,680
Well, no specifics
about other clients.
624
00:25:56,814 --> 00:25:57,854
Of course, right.
Got it.
625
00:25:57,932 --> 00:26:00,484
And, um...
626
00:26:00,601 --> 00:26:03,153
I'm a writer, so...
627
00:26:03,237 --> 00:26:06,990
Let's say I was to write
about our encounter.
628
00:26:07,108 --> 00:26:09,493
As long
as you don't use my name.
629
00:26:09,610 --> 00:26:12,029
- Is Carl your real name?
- No.
630
00:26:12,163 --> 00:26:13,530
No, but don't use Carl.
631
00:26:13,698 --> 00:26:15,499
I don't want my agency to know
that I was freelancing tonight.
632
00:26:15,616 --> 00:26:16,616
Oh, my God.
633
00:26:16,668 --> 00:26:18,869
- You have an agent?
- I do.
634
00:26:19,037 --> 00:26:20,203
I have an agent.
635
00:26:20,338 --> 00:26:21,955
It's--it's
an escort service, actually.
636
00:26:22,090 --> 00:26:24,257
- Uh-huh.
- But they take 20%,
637
00:26:24,375 --> 00:26:26,176
and with the baby-style
convention in town,
638
00:26:26,294 --> 00:26:27,544
talk about
an underserved community.
639
00:26:27,679 --> 00:26:28,679
Right.
640
00:26:29,180 --> 00:26:31,431
I get to pick myself.
641
00:26:31,549 --> 00:26:35,852
So, bas--you can--
You can actually eyeball a woman
642
00:26:35,970 --> 00:26:38,355
from across the room
and decide whether you want to,
643
00:26:38,439 --> 00:26:41,274
um, "date" her.
644
00:26:41,642 --> 00:26:43,360
Exactly.
645
00:26:43,477 --> 00:26:45,612
Which means you did
actually pick me.
646
00:26:45,696 --> 00:26:48,865
I did.
Absolutely.
647
00:26:48,983 --> 00:26:50,533
Does that make you
feel better?
648
00:26:50,651 --> 00:26:52,068
- It does, actually.
- Yeah.
649
00:26:53,235 --> 00:26:54,327
Good.
650
00:26:57,606 --> 00:26:58,899
Let's do it.
651
00:27:00,911 --> 00:27:04,747
I can't feel my heart.
652
00:27:04,882 --> 00:27:09,586
How will I love
if I can't feel my heart?
653
00:27:09,753 --> 00:27:13,256
Um, Derek, can you help her?
She can't find her heart.
654
00:27:13,340 --> 00:27:15,808
Where did you
lose your heart, Becca?
655
00:27:15,926 --> 00:27:17,260
I don't know.
656
00:27:17,344 --> 00:27:19,812
- No, it's not helping.
- I don't know.
657
00:27:19,930 --> 00:27:22,098
- Hmm?
- You're a charlatan.
658
00:27:22,233 --> 00:27:25,235
You're not real.
659
00:27:25,352 --> 00:27:29,656
You're not English.
That's a fake accent.
660
00:27:29,773 --> 00:27:31,274
I see it, the words.
661
00:27:33,694 --> 00:27:35,278
Am I not real, Jake?
662
00:27:35,446 --> 00:27:36,913
No.
663
00:27:37,031 --> 00:27:41,618
There's something fraudulent
in your life.
664
00:27:41,785 --> 00:27:43,670
Are you ready to face it?
665
00:27:46,173 --> 00:27:48,341
In mine?
666
00:27:51,796 --> 00:27:54,264
- Everything.
- Oh.
667
00:27:54,382 --> 00:27:56,933
I'm acting...
668
00:27:57,051 --> 00:28:00,637
Like I'm okay...
669
00:28:00,771 --> 00:28:02,972
Like I know.
670
00:28:03,107 --> 00:28:04,607
I don't know.
671
00:28:12,616 --> 00:28:14,117
Ugh.
672
00:28:14,235 --> 00:28:15,702
Jesus, I need to go home.
673
00:28:15,820 --> 00:28:17,287
Yeah.
674
00:28:17,405 --> 00:28:20,073
- You go with that.
- Yeah?
675
00:28:23,210 --> 00:28:25,078
It's okay.
676
00:28:29,884 --> 00:28:32,085
Oh, my God.
677
00:28:32,253 --> 00:28:35,388
Oh, my God,
that feels so good.
678
00:28:35,506 --> 00:28:38,224
Oh, my God.
679
00:28:42,179 --> 00:28:44,264
Trick of the trade.
680
00:28:44,398 --> 00:28:46,599
So you were saying?
681
00:28:46,684 --> 00:28:47,964
I have no idea
what I'm saying.
682
00:28:48,018 --> 00:28:49,486
What am I saying?
683
00:28:49,603 --> 00:28:51,723
- Something about a slump.
- Oh, my self-esteem slump?
684
00:28:51,772 --> 00:28:54,240
Yeah.
685
00:28:54,358 --> 00:28:57,110
It's just that
that Cleo author,
686
00:28:57,278 --> 00:29:00,246
she has--she has gone
so out of her way
687
00:29:00,364 --> 00:29:02,365
to malign me,
and we're in the same market,
688
00:29:02,500 --> 00:29:04,334
and I have just been talking
about this for so long.
689
00:29:04,452 --> 00:29:07,170
I'm boring myself.
690
00:29:07,288 --> 00:29:08,888
Still, it is really weird
how much energy
691
00:29:08,923 --> 00:29:11,374
she's putting
into trying to hurt me.
692
00:29:11,509 --> 00:29:13,042
Oh, I just think
she's scared.
693
00:29:13,177 --> 00:29:15,011
- Who--Cleo?
- Yeah.
694
00:29:15,129 --> 00:29:16,930
You told the truth,
and now you're braving
695
00:29:17,047 --> 00:29:19,132
- the consequences.
- I wouldn't call it brave.
696
00:29:20,634 --> 00:29:21,968
I don't think she's scared.
697
00:29:22,103 --> 00:29:24,854
I've essentially made more room
on the shelf for her book.
698
00:29:24,972 --> 00:29:26,940
Back-burner Baby?
Come on.
699
00:29:27,057 --> 00:29:28,057
She's full of shit.
700
00:29:28,941 --> 00:29:30,334
That's an act.
701
00:29:30,478 --> 00:29:33,313
Like Carrrl?
702
00:29:33,447 --> 00:29:34,727
Hey, people dig
what I'm selling.
703
00:29:34,782 --> 00:29:36,222
- Yeah.
- We both know it's not real.
704
00:29:36,233 --> 00:29:38,902
I know. I-I care too much
about what people think of me.
705
00:29:39,036 --> 00:29:40,737
I always have.
706
00:29:40,871 --> 00:29:41,871
Oh, I get that.
707
00:29:41,989 --> 00:29:43,490
You know, I used to care
what people thought
708
00:29:43,624 --> 00:29:45,325
about what I did
for a living--
709
00:29:45,459 --> 00:29:47,243
You know, the very few people
that I told.
710
00:29:47,328 --> 00:29:48,795
My sister thinks
I'm going to hell.
711
00:29:48,913 --> 00:29:50,497
Seriously, and we're close.
712
00:29:50,581 --> 00:29:52,582
Wow, that's--
That's rough.
713
00:29:52,716 --> 00:29:55,752
Yeah, it is what it is.
714
00:29:55,836 --> 00:29:59,422
You know, one day I had
this, uh--this breakthrough.
715
00:29:59,557 --> 00:30:00,757
And I started thinking
about all the people
716
00:30:00,891 --> 00:30:03,426
- that I think are awesome.
- Like who?
717
00:30:03,561 --> 00:30:07,063
Oh, uh, Axl Rose,
uh, Gandhi.
718
00:30:07,181 --> 00:30:09,098
- Mm.
- George W.
719
00:30:09,183 --> 00:30:11,234
- What?
- What?
720
00:30:11,352 --> 00:30:13,820
- W? As in Bush?
- Yeah. Absolutely.
721
00:30:13,904 --> 00:30:15,071
- Okay.
- Yeah.
722
00:30:15,189 --> 00:30:18,691
And I thought
nobody truly interesting
723
00:30:18,859 --> 00:30:21,027
is universally liked, right?
724
00:30:21,162 --> 00:30:22,695
So I don't know.
725
00:30:22,780 --> 00:30:25,748
I thought, "I don't ever
want to live an ordinary life.
726
00:30:25,866 --> 00:30:27,417
"I never have.
727
00:30:27,535 --> 00:30:32,205
People don't approve?
Eh, screw 'em."
728
00:30:32,373 --> 00:30:34,791
Nobody truly interesting...
729
00:30:34,925 --> 00:30:38,044
- ...Is universally liked.
- Yeah.
730
00:30:38,179 --> 00:30:39,929
Wow.
731
00:30:40,047 --> 00:30:43,183
You just threw down
some serious wisdom there, Carl.
732
00:30:43,267 --> 00:30:46,719
Yeah, well, I hang with a lot
of smart women.
733
00:30:46,887 --> 00:30:49,022
Hmm.
734
00:30:49,139 --> 00:30:50,499
You're like a wise,
magical hooker.
735
00:30:51,722 --> 00:30:53,250
Well, that's role-playing.
736
00:30:53,310 --> 00:30:56,396
That'll cost you extra.
737
00:31:01,569 --> 00:31:03,736
Hmm.
738
00:31:05,372 --> 00:31:08,324
I am so glad
you're a republican.
739
00:31:08,459 --> 00:31:09,826
I would have spent
a lot more money on you,
740
00:31:09,960 --> 00:31:12,161
but the whole W thing
really cured me.
741
00:31:23,057 --> 00:31:26,593
Hey, uh, have you seen
Jake anywhere?
742
00:31:26,760 --> 00:31:28,228
Why, is he missing?
743
00:31:28,345 --> 00:31:29,562
Well, his car's
still here,
744
00:31:29,680 --> 00:31:32,599
but I can't find him
anywhere.
745
00:31:45,613 --> 00:31:49,782
♪ In her own mad mind,
she's in love with you ♪
746
00:32:22,316 --> 00:32:23,733
- We need to get moving.
- Yeah.
747
00:32:23,817 --> 00:32:26,119
- Yes, we are gonna get moving.
- Let's shoot some babies.
748
00:32:26,203 --> 00:32:27,320
- Yeah.
- Pow, pow, pow.
749
00:32:27,488 --> 00:32:28,488
Pow, pow.
750
00:32:29,848 --> 00:32:30,931
Hi, babies.
751
00:32:31,041 --> 00:32:33,660
Yes.
Hey, hey.
752
00:32:33,744 --> 00:32:36,095
- Look.
- I can't work like this.
753
00:32:36,213 --> 00:32:37,830
Right, these are not
professional babies.
754
00:32:37,965 --> 00:32:39,999
Yes, they are. Look.
Come on, babies, razzle--
755
00:32:40,084 --> 00:32:41,384
Look at that.
756
00:32:41,502 --> 00:32:43,753
- Razzle dazzle, that's right.
- Why's that one so red?
757
00:32:43,887 --> 00:32:45,004
Poo-face.
758
00:32:45,089 --> 00:32:47,807
Awesome.
759
00:32:47,925 --> 00:32:49,425
New baby.
760
00:32:49,510 --> 00:32:51,590
I don't have any other babies.
I have three babies.
761
00:32:51,645 --> 00:32:54,063
- You're kidding.
- No, I'm not kidding.
762
00:32:54,181 --> 00:32:57,517
Phoebe, if you want a shot
of three babies happy together,
763
00:32:57,685 --> 00:32:59,319
you need to call in
12 babies.
764
00:32:59,436 --> 00:33:03,189
Well, no three babies
are ever happy at the same time.
765
00:33:03,324 --> 00:33:04,357
I didn't know that.
766
00:33:04,491 --> 00:33:07,327
Oh, somebody needs
a diaper change, pronto.
767
00:33:07,444 --> 00:33:09,078
Can you just
change it, Lyla?
768
00:33:09,196 --> 00:33:11,080
- I don't know where the--
- Just figure it out, Lyla.
769
00:33:11,198 --> 00:33:13,416
There's diapers over there.
770
00:33:13,534 --> 00:33:16,252
I just need one good shot.
That's it.
771
00:33:16,370 --> 00:33:18,037
- Here.
- What?
772
00:33:18,205 --> 00:33:19,339
No.
You take him.
773
00:33:19,456 --> 00:33:21,090
I am so sick of you
and the way you talk to me.
774
00:33:21,208 --> 00:33:22,458
You know what, Lyla?
775
00:33:22,593 --> 00:33:24,093
Can you not do "this is all
about me" thing right now?
776
00:33:24,211 --> 00:33:26,629
- That's the last thing I need.
- Okay. Good luck.
777
00:33:27,885 --> 00:33:29,489
Lulu, are you okay?
778
00:33:29,600 --> 00:33:32,268
Oh, my God, Lulu's choking.
She's choking.
779
00:33:32,386 --> 00:33:36,139
Oh, my God.
Um, um, will you hold?
780
00:33:36,223 --> 00:33:38,057
Oh, I think he--
He ate the bracelet.
781
00:33:38,192 --> 00:33:39,225
He ate the bracelet.
782
00:33:39,360 --> 00:33:41,227
Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.
783
00:33:41,395 --> 00:33:43,396
Oh, he's breathing and crying.
784
00:33:43,564 --> 00:33:45,644
And breathing and crying,
that's a good thing, right?
785
00:33:45,649 --> 00:33:47,533
That means he's breathing.
That's great, right?
786
00:33:47,618 --> 00:33:50,870
What the hell
is wrong with you?
787
00:33:50,988 --> 00:33:53,740
It's just gonna come out
the other end.
788
00:33:53,874 --> 00:33:56,409
And when it does,
you can keep it!
789
00:34:01,382 --> 00:34:02,999
You know, honestly,
I feel weird taking your money.
790
00:34:03,133 --> 00:34:04,300
- Really?
- Yeah.
791
00:34:04,418 --> 00:34:06,052
Why?
'Cause we didn't cross the line?
792
00:34:06,170 --> 00:34:10,089
And I was exhausted
and fell asleep.
793
00:34:10,224 --> 00:34:12,141
But I really
enjoyed the time.
794
00:34:12,259 --> 00:34:16,596
- Well, no backsies.
- All right.
795
00:34:16,730 --> 00:34:18,264
You're gonna have
to owe me one.
796
00:34:18,348 --> 00:34:21,100
Deal.
797
00:34:21,185 --> 00:34:25,438
Abby McCarthy,
didn't expect to see you here.
798
00:34:25,572 --> 00:34:28,191
Who's your charming friend?
799
00:34:30,872 --> 00:34:34,074
Patty Wells, journalist,
this is my friend, Carl.
800
00:34:34,458 --> 00:34:35,992
- Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you, Patty
801
00:34:36,077 --> 00:34:40,797
um, I just want to say
thank you for the loan.
802
00:34:40,915 --> 00:34:42,899
You really rescued me
last night.
803
00:34:43,250 --> 00:34:45,885
Let's just say,
off the record,
804
00:34:45,970 --> 00:34:47,587
that the roulette wheel
is not my friend.
805
00:34:47,755 --> 00:34:49,756
Well, I hope you learned
your lesson.
806
00:34:49,890 --> 00:34:51,824
Yeah, I did.
It was very expensive.
807
00:34:51,959 --> 00:34:53,643
It wasn't that expensive.
808
00:34:53,761 --> 00:34:55,845
See you, I hope.
809
00:34:55,980 --> 00:34:57,680
Bye.
810
00:34:59,233 --> 00:35:01,734
Abby, who was that?
811
00:35:01,852 --> 00:35:04,737
Looked too handsome
to be a hit man.
812
00:35:04,855 --> 00:35:06,823
For Cleo?
After the awful things
813
00:35:06,941 --> 00:35:08,358
- she said about you?
- Uh--
814
00:35:08,442 --> 00:35:09,909
Come on, Abby,
nobody's heard from you.
815
00:35:10,027 --> 00:35:12,412
- You must have a response.
- I better not.
816
00:35:12,529 --> 00:35:14,280
Come on, that bitch
stepped to you.
817
00:35:14,448 --> 00:35:17,000
Yeah, she really did, right?
818
00:35:17,117 --> 00:35:18,785
But I...
819
00:35:18,953 --> 00:35:20,670
- I think she's great.
- Uhhuh.
820
00:35:20,788 --> 00:35:22,922
I call bull.
She called you irrelevant.
821
00:35:23,040 --> 00:35:24,424
Yep.
822
00:35:24,541 --> 00:35:27,010
And the truth is,
I found it validating...
823
00:35:27,127 --> 00:35:30,096
Because no one truly interesting
is universally liked.
824
00:35:30,180 --> 00:35:32,799
And as you know,
my life has become
825
00:35:32,933 --> 00:35:35,685
a lot more interesting lately.
826
00:35:35,803 --> 00:35:38,304
Okay, I get it.
That's great.
827
00:35:38,439 --> 00:35:39,806
What are you working on now?
828
00:35:39,940 --> 00:35:42,558
My editor would like
to keep it under wraps.
829
00:35:42,693 --> 00:35:44,527
But I will say it is
a new book,
830
00:35:44,645 --> 00:35:46,112
maybe even a new series.
831
00:35:46,230 --> 00:35:48,364
And let's just say
that people are going to be
832
00:35:48,482 --> 00:35:51,567
very surprised
at the new Abby McCarthy.
833
00:35:51,702 --> 00:35:53,319
When you're ready,
we'll do a nice item on you.
834
00:35:53,487 --> 00:35:54,621
Fantastic.
835
00:35:54,705 --> 00:35:56,322
I better get in there
and listen to that whack job
836
00:35:56,490 --> 00:35:57,707
brag about neglecting
her children.
837
00:35:57,825 --> 00:35:58,958
Ha!
838
00:35:59,076 --> 00:36:00,243
Can't wait till
her five minutes are up.
839
00:36:00,377 --> 00:36:02,996
Bye, Patty.
Have a good one.
840
00:36:06,634 --> 00:36:07,853
Hey.
841
00:36:10,170 --> 00:36:12,005
Hey, guys.
842
00:36:12,589 --> 00:36:14,089
Phoebe, how was
your photo shoot?
843
00:36:14,224 --> 00:36:15,674
It was a perfect
shitstorm.
844
00:36:15,809 --> 00:36:17,393
I really could have used
more hands.
845
00:36:17,511 --> 00:36:18,677
I'm so sorry.
846
00:36:18,812 --> 00:36:20,880
I-I totally intended on coming,
847
00:36:21,064 --> 00:36:23,649
but then my--my night
took the craziest turn.
848
00:36:23,767 --> 00:36:26,102
I met a guy who gave me
849
00:36:26,236 --> 00:36:28,437
the most amazing insight.
850
00:36:28,605 --> 00:36:30,356
And work-wise, I feel like
I have an idea.
851
00:36:30,490 --> 00:36:34,027
It's really bold and more me,
and I-I just don't--
852
00:36:34,194 --> 00:36:35,662
What is happening here?
853
00:36:35,746 --> 00:36:38,498
- Lyla, what is going on?
- The caseworker's report-
854
00:36:38,615 --> 00:36:42,368
They recommend 70/30 custody
in Dan's favor.
855
00:36:42,503 --> 00:36:43,670
- Oh, no.
- What?
856
00:36:43,754 --> 00:36:48,341
My sons feel much more
emotionally connected to him.
857
00:36:48,459 --> 00:36:50,927
And I'm never home.
Oh, my God, Lyla.
858
00:36:51,045 --> 00:36:52,628
Oh, are you
sympathetic now?
859
00:36:52,713 --> 00:36:53,993
Yes, of course
I'm sympathetic.
860
00:36:54,048 --> 00:36:56,132
What you did to me
was not helpful at all.
861
00:36:56,266 --> 00:36:58,601
You made me miss story time
at my son's school.
862
00:36:58,719 --> 00:36:59,769
Oh, my God, Lyla,
863
00:36:59,887 --> 00:37:01,137
please do not blame me
for your custody battle.
864
00:37:01,221 --> 00:37:03,723
We didn't know
it was this bad.
865
00:37:03,891 --> 00:37:07,143
I-I have to go home.
866
00:37:07,277 --> 00:37:08,394
I have to go home.
867
00:37:08,529 --> 00:37:09,779
I should've--
I should've been home.
868
00:37:09,897 --> 00:37:11,781
But I'm gonna fly,
'cause I can't--
869
00:37:11,899 --> 00:37:13,232
No, come on.
Come on.
870
00:37:13,400 --> 00:37:16,703
I don't want to ride back
with you guys.
871
00:37:22,826 --> 00:37:25,161
Lyla, you can't just leave
without us.
872
00:37:48,989 --> 00:37:52,158
♪ And when you fly by,
pick me up ♪
873
00:37:54,161 --> 00:37:57,714
♪ And, baby,
I'm loads of fun ♪
874
00:37:57,832 --> 00:38:01,751
♪ So, when you fly by,
pick me up ♪
875
00:38:20,738 --> 00:38:24,657
Jake,
what are you doing here?
876
00:38:24,775 --> 00:38:25,992
Hey.
877
00:38:26,110 --> 00:38:28,111
Shh.
878
00:38:28,195 --> 00:38:29,863
- You remember baby gourd?
- Yeah.
879
00:38:32,583 --> 00:38:35,869
Uh, I'm tripping.
880
00:38:36,003 --> 00:38:37,670
Yeah, I can see that.
881
00:38:37,755 --> 00:38:39,289
Yeah?
882
00:38:43,711 --> 00:38:46,880
I really needed to be here.
I needed to be home.
883
00:38:48,299 --> 00:38:50,717
Abby, I don't want
to live with you.
884
00:38:52,553 --> 00:38:54,220
But I do want to die with you.
885
00:38:56,440 --> 00:38:59,225
I get that.
886
00:39:04,064 --> 00:39:06,399
- Okay, do you want to lay down?
- Yeah.
887
00:39:06,534 --> 00:39:08,952
Okay, let's go do that.
Just come over here.
888
00:39:09,069 --> 00:39:10,069
Are you loaded?
889
00:39:10,070 --> 00:39:12,205
I'm--a little bit, yeah.
890
00:39:12,323 --> 00:39:14,490
All right.
891
00:39:16,076 --> 00:39:19,495
There you go.
892
00:39:19,630 --> 00:39:22,215
- All right.
- Oh, yes.
893
00:39:22,299 --> 00:39:24,884
Love this couch.
894
00:39:24,969 --> 00:39:27,470
Here, sit here.
895
00:39:27,588 --> 00:39:30,256
- Just get some rest.
- Sit down. Sit--come here.
896
00:39:30,391 --> 00:39:33,760
That's your...
897
00:39:33,844 --> 00:39:35,895
- Wedding tuxedo.
- Yeah.
898
00:39:35,996 --> 00:39:38,982
Abby...
899
00:39:42,770 --> 00:39:44,938
Why did we have to split
900
00:39:45,105 --> 00:39:49,325
for me to see
how goddamn beautiful you are?
901
00:39:49,443 --> 00:39:51,327
You are so beautiful.
902
00:40:29,316 --> 00:40:30,984
Mama, what time is it?
903
00:40:31,151 --> 00:40:32,368
It's late.
904
00:40:32,486 --> 00:40:34,370
I love you.
905
00:40:37,041 --> 00:40:38,157
I love you too.
906
00:40:38,325 --> 00:40:39,325
Thank you.
907
00:40:39,376 --> 00:40:42,211
- What's going on?
- Hi.
908
00:40:42,329 --> 00:40:44,664
What's up?
909
00:40:44,798 --> 00:40:45,798
How are you?
910
00:40:45,916 --> 00:40:47,383
Everything's okay.
911
00:40:47,501 --> 00:40:49,002
It's okay.
912
00:40:49,169 --> 00:40:53,139
I just thought that maybe...
913
00:40:53,257 --> 00:40:56,726
We could just pack some things
and go on a trip.
914
00:41:00,147 --> 00:41:03,816
It's gonna be an adventure.
915
00:41:03,934 --> 00:41:05,735
Okay?
916
00:41:05,959 --> 00:41:10,159
Sync & corrections by Alice
www.addic7ed.com