1 00:01:00,692 --> 00:01:05,364 We've only just begun 2 00:01:07,155 --> 00:01:10,870 Before the rising sun 3 00:01:13,456 --> 00:01:16,790 We've only just begun 4 00:01:16,832 --> 00:01:19,668 Day by day 5 00:01:19,710 --> 00:01:22,130 Together 6 00:01:23,507 --> 00:01:25,426 Oh, and together 7 00:01:25,468 --> 00:01:26,967 Just the two of us 8 00:01:48,697 --> 00:01:49,866 What is that? 9 00:01:56,123 --> 00:01:57,542 Oh, come on! 10 00:02:07,008 --> 00:02:09,010 Shut up! 11 00:02:33,828 --> 00:02:35,495 Kiss! 12 00:02:35,537 --> 00:02:37,706 The devil's music. 13 00:02:40,708 --> 00:02:43,628 You say you wanna go for a spin 14 00:02:43,670 --> 00:02:47,008 The party's just begun, we'll let you in 15 00:02:47,049 --> 00:02:49,176 You drive us wild 16 00:02:49,385 --> 00:02:51,635 We'll drive you crazy 17 00:02:54,181 --> 00:02:55,641 You keep on shouting 18 00:02:57,853 --> 00:02:59,687 I can't fucking hear you! 19 00:03:01,064 --> 00:03:05,483 I wanna rock and roll all night 20 00:03:06,861 --> 00:03:08,405 And party every day 21 00:03:24,795 --> 00:03:26,131 You keep on shouting 22 00:03:27,632 --> 00:03:29,092 What? 23 00:03:29,134 --> 00:03:31,010 Give it to me, baby! 24 00:03:31,053 --> 00:03:35,555 I wanna rock and roll all night 25 00:03:35,597 --> 00:03:36,974 Let's party 26 00:03:36,974 --> 00:03:38,643 And party every day 27 00:03:38,684 --> 00:03:40,645 I wanna rock 28 00:03:40,645 --> 00:03:42,440 I wanna rock until I die 29 00:04:02,375 --> 00:04:05,126 Thank you, Cleveland! 30 00:04:05,126 --> 00:04:06,586 You've been great... 31 00:04:06,670 --> 00:04:10,342 but after three and a half hours of kick-ass rock and roll... 32 00:04:10,384 --> 00:04:12,469 and seven encores on top of that... 33 00:04:12,511 --> 00:04:15,554 I'm sorry to say we gotta get back to our hotel rooms... 34 00:04:15,595 --> 00:04:18,473 and fuck some groupies, so... 35 00:04:22,603 --> 00:04:24,566 What are you doing, man? 36 00:04:24,607 --> 00:04:26,525 Fuckin' asshole, man. 37 00:04:26,525 --> 00:04:27,942 That's my bass. 38 00:04:27,984 --> 00:04:30,903 Just one more day of school to get through, girls... 39 00:04:30,946 --> 00:04:32,072 before tomorrow night. 40 00:04:32,114 --> 00:04:37,535 Come on, all Detroit, Michigan, you wanted the best! 41 00:04:37,535 --> 00:04:39,538 You got the best! 42 00:04:39,538 --> 00:04:42,542 The hottest band in the world! 43 00:04:42,542 --> 00:04:44,167 Kiss! 44 00:04:51,048 --> 00:04:53,094 Who is it? 45 00:04:53,136 --> 00:04:55,638 Shit, man! It's Jam's mom. 46 00:04:55,680 --> 00:04:57,848 What? It's my mom? 47 00:04:57,889 --> 00:04:59,098 Cover this shit up. 48 00:04:59,141 --> 00:05:00,934 Spray something. It smells like dope. 49 00:05:00,976 --> 00:05:03,854 Just like Jam's mom to ruin the fucking party. 50 00:05:03,896 --> 00:05:06,107 It smells in here, man. 51 00:05:10,359 --> 00:05:11,446 Jeremiah! 52 00:05:11,486 --> 00:05:13,531 You get out here this instant! 53 00:05:14,656 --> 00:05:15,782 Hi, Mom. 54 00:05:15,824 --> 00:05:17,575 Now! 55 00:05:18,576 --> 00:05:19,702 What's up? 56 00:05:19,745 --> 00:05:21,913 The devil's body count, that's what's up. 57 00:05:21,954 --> 00:05:24,667 Don't you know what "KlSS" stands for? 58 00:05:24,709 --> 00:05:27,338 Knights In Satan's Service. 59 00:05:27,420 --> 00:05:29,086 -Where is Karen Carpenter? -How would I know? 60 00:05:29,128 --> 00:05:32,716 -You have Donny and Marie, too? -Why would l? 61 00:05:34,927 --> 00:05:37,723 I had a nightmare that bullshit like this might happen. 62 00:05:37,765 --> 00:05:39,932 If he misses Peter Criss' drum solo... 63 00:05:39,973 --> 00:05:42,099 he won't be able to continue with his life. 64 00:05:42,142 --> 00:05:44,144 Lex, quit jinxing us, man. 65 00:05:44,352 --> 00:05:46,439 Nobody's missing that concert tomorrow night. 66 00:06:27,564 --> 00:06:30,857 They're larger-than-life space-age comic-book heroes... 67 00:06:30,857 --> 00:06:33,860 the most sensational phenomenon of the past decade. 68 00:06:33,902 --> 00:06:35,028 Their fans are fanatical. 69 00:06:35,070 --> 00:06:38,616 Each fan has a favorite, each one a fantasy. 70 00:06:44,580 --> 00:06:47,040 The rock-and-roll band Kiss is in town. 71 00:06:47,082 --> 00:06:50,671 For some people, that spells trouble with a capital "T". 72 00:07:06,602 --> 00:07:10,441 I shall resign the presidency effective at noon tomorrow. 73 00:07:10,481 --> 00:07:12,401 Kiss is hotter than hell! 74 00:07:12,443 --> 00:07:14,359 The protesters are mainly religious groups. 75 00:07:14,359 --> 00:07:16,403 Satan worship and drugs among our kids. 76 00:07:16,445 --> 00:07:18,865 Each 12 1/2-inch figure sold separately. 77 00:08:14,880 --> 00:08:16,004 -Jam. -Hawk. 78 00:08:16,046 --> 00:08:19,466 Listen. We're in a bit of a quandary right now. 79 00:08:19,509 --> 00:08:22,347 -They're fucking gone! -What's gone? 80 00:08:22,389 --> 00:08:25,308 What do you think? The Kiss tickets! 81 00:08:25,350 --> 00:08:26,431 Gone? 82 00:08:26,474 --> 00:08:29,726 -Please tell me you have them. -Why would I have them? 83 00:08:29,769 --> 00:08:30,938 I don't know, man. 84 00:08:30,980 --> 00:08:33,399 Check whatever you were wearing last night. 85 00:08:35,651 --> 00:08:36,942 Now, man! 86 00:08:44,410 --> 00:08:45,829 I got 'em. 87 00:08:45,912 --> 00:08:47,619 He's got 'em. 88 00:08:47,661 --> 00:08:49,914 I must have taken Trip's jacket by mistake. 89 00:08:49,956 --> 00:08:51,624 I'm really sorry about that. 90 00:08:51,666 --> 00:08:53,502 Don't be such a wuss, Jam. 91 00:08:53,544 --> 00:08:55,130 Are you grounded? 92 00:08:55,337 --> 00:08:59,507 Yeah, but has that ever stopped me before? 93 00:08:59,549 --> 00:09:01,467 See you guys at school. 94 00:09:02,428 --> 00:09:04,430 Poor Jam, man. 95 00:09:04,471 --> 00:09:06,432 Imagine having to stash your Kiss records... 96 00:09:06,472 --> 00:09:08,766 in Carly Simon album covers. 97 00:09:08,808 --> 00:09:10,561 How shitty is that? 98 00:09:10,602 --> 00:09:11,769 No question. 99 00:09:11,811 --> 00:09:14,608 Mrs. Bruce is a psycho bitch from hell. 100 00:09:14,648 --> 00:09:16,275 You're one to talk, Lex. 101 00:09:16,318 --> 00:09:17,819 Your mom's a fuckin' dyke. 102 00:09:17,861 --> 00:09:19,944 Just because she's a female gynecologist... 103 00:09:20,029 --> 00:09:21,486 that doesn't mean she's a lesbian. 104 00:09:21,529 --> 00:09:23,033 Even if she was... 105 00:09:23,073 --> 00:09:25,910 at least my mom didn't give birth to me while on LSD. 106 00:09:25,952 --> 00:09:27,454 Shrooms! 107 00:09:27,494 --> 00:09:29,579 Will you guys quit the mom bashing? 108 00:09:29,620 --> 00:09:33,083 Lex's mom is cool because she lets us spend the night... 109 00:09:33,334 --> 00:09:34,877 and if it wasn't for your mom, Trip... 110 00:09:34,918 --> 00:09:37,922 we wouldn't have smoked that fine Panama Red last night. 111 00:09:37,964 --> 00:09:40,758 So leave the women who gave you life out of it. 112 00:09:40,799 --> 00:09:42,051 They're both cool. 113 00:09:42,091 --> 00:09:43,385 Let's go. 114 00:09:47,933 --> 00:09:50,016 -Trip, you asshole! -What? 115 00:09:50,058 --> 00:09:52,853 You spilled the bong water all over the bed. 116 00:09:52,895 --> 00:09:54,439 Stupid... 117 00:09:55,606 --> 00:09:56,733 Come on. 118 00:09:59,569 --> 00:10:01,904 Jeremiah, it's time to go. Get-- 119 00:10:03,112 --> 00:10:04,865 What are you doing? 120 00:10:04,907 --> 00:10:07,495 Just, uh, whew! 121 00:10:07,495 --> 00:10:08,954 Getting a little sunshine. 122 00:10:09,037 --> 00:10:11,746 You're gonna be late if you don't change soon. 123 00:10:11,789 --> 00:10:14,123 Change? 124 00:10:14,166 --> 00:10:16,627 What's wrong with the clothes I wore last night? 125 00:10:16,669 --> 00:10:19,129 It's dirty laundry, for one thing. 126 00:10:19,171 --> 00:10:22,383 And you still haven't tried on the clothes I bought you. 127 00:10:22,423 --> 00:10:26,011 You're skating on thin ice, so I wouldn't push my luck. 128 00:10:26,054 --> 00:10:27,555 Get out of those rags. 129 00:10:27,596 --> 00:10:28,932 Mom, it's-- 130 00:10:28,974 --> 00:10:31,059 And, besides, those jeans are so tight... 131 00:10:31,102 --> 00:10:33,394 I can see your penis. 132 00:10:33,477 --> 00:10:34,602 Excuse me. 133 00:10:35,645 --> 00:10:38,191 This jacket, it stinks of B.O. 134 00:10:38,401 --> 00:10:41,445 It's enough to make a person sick. 135 00:10:41,487 --> 00:10:42,653 Now, remember. 136 00:10:42,695 --> 00:10:44,071 I have my church meeting... 137 00:10:44,113 --> 00:10:47,074 so you'll be on the honor system tonight. 138 00:10:47,117 --> 00:10:49,911 I'll be home a little after one. 139 00:10:49,953 --> 00:10:51,413 And if you've been partying... 140 00:10:51,453 --> 00:10:54,038 or playing that satanic Kiss music... 141 00:10:56,584 --> 00:10:59,086 need I remind you of the consequences? 142 00:11:01,463 --> 00:11:03,882 Grounded for the rest of the year? 143 00:11:03,923 --> 00:11:06,050 You are a smart boy. 144 00:11:06,093 --> 00:11:09,389 Put these on before they go out of style. 145 00:11:09,431 --> 00:11:11,349 Come on, take it. 146 00:11:27,114 --> 00:11:30,912 Man, school. What a fuckin' waste of time. 147 00:11:30,952 --> 00:11:33,831 I wish someone would tell these chicks that disco's dead! 148 00:11:33,873 --> 00:11:36,915 Don't stare too long, boys. You'll go blind. 149 00:11:36,958 --> 00:11:38,126 Yeah, right. 150 00:11:39,669 --> 00:11:43,758 Stellas. I hate Stellas almost as much as I hate dogs. 151 00:11:43,798 --> 00:11:46,425 Yeah, man. Same species when you think about it. 152 00:11:53,559 --> 00:11:56,477 Shit, man. That geek looks like Jam. 153 00:11:58,647 --> 00:12:00,649 That geek is Jam. 154 00:12:00,690 --> 00:12:02,400 Hey, dork! 155 00:12:07,822 --> 00:12:09,616 Who did your wardrobe? 156 00:12:09,658 --> 00:12:12,661 Tad the Preppie Sailboat Captain? 157 00:12:12,703 --> 00:12:15,791 My mom had me over a barrel, all right? 158 00:12:15,831 --> 00:12:18,667 After last night, I had to let her dress me. 159 00:12:18,707 --> 00:12:19,833 It's a give-and-take relationship. 160 00:12:19,875 --> 00:12:21,628 She gives you shit, and you take it. 161 00:12:21,670 --> 00:12:23,464 Hey, Jam, hand over the tickets. 162 00:12:23,507 --> 00:12:25,341 Tickets? 163 00:12:25,383 --> 00:12:26,842 What? 164 00:12:26,884 --> 00:12:30,053 There's a, uh... Iittle, little problem. 165 00:12:30,095 --> 00:12:32,557 They're still at my house in Trip's jacket. 166 00:12:32,597 --> 00:12:34,100 What are you talking about? 167 00:12:34,140 --> 00:12:36,519 She was standing over me when I was changing. 168 00:12:36,562 --> 00:12:38,061 You are so pathetic. 169 00:12:38,103 --> 00:12:40,438 That's some sick shit right there, man. 170 00:12:40,480 --> 00:12:42,817 Does she comb your ass hair for you, too? 171 00:12:42,858 --> 00:12:44,570 If she even smells those tickets... 172 00:12:44,610 --> 00:12:45,861 she'll destroy 'em... 173 00:12:45,903 --> 00:12:48,612 and we miss Kiss for the third year in a row. 174 00:12:48,654 --> 00:12:50,447 It's gonna be OK. Don't worry. 175 00:12:50,490 --> 00:12:52,618 They're at my house. They're perfectly safe. 176 00:12:52,660 --> 00:12:54,412 We'll go there after school and pick them up. 177 00:12:54,452 --> 00:12:56,664 My mom's not even gonna be there. 178 00:12:56,706 --> 00:13:00,750 Hours from now we're actually gonna be seeing Kiss. 179 00:13:00,792 --> 00:13:02,794 We'll just double-time it to your house... 180 00:13:02,837 --> 00:13:03,962 grab the tickets... 181 00:13:04,005 --> 00:13:05,840 then head to the train station... 182 00:13:05,881 --> 00:13:10,428 for the three forty-five to Detroit Rock City! 183 00:13:10,468 --> 00:13:11,888 God! 184 00:13:11,888 --> 00:13:14,806 Well, as they say in the tampon biz... 185 00:13:14,849 --> 00:13:16,602 see you next period. 186 00:13:21,898 --> 00:13:23,024 Jerk. 187 00:13:45,463 --> 00:13:47,423 I'm sorry. 188 00:13:47,423 --> 00:13:49,133 It's not a problem. 189 00:13:49,175 --> 00:13:50,801 Thanks. 190 00:13:50,843 --> 00:13:52,970 Fine. 191 00:14:00,979 --> 00:14:02,437 Hey, Beth. 192 00:14:04,731 --> 00:14:05,858 I'm so sorry. 193 00:14:05,900 --> 00:14:09,071 Mr. Bruce, Miss Bumsteen, is there a problem? 194 00:14:09,112 --> 00:14:11,366 Uh, no, there... 195 00:14:11,406 --> 00:14:13,449 there's no problem. 196 00:14:13,532 --> 00:14:14,951 I'm so sorry. 197 00:14:14,991 --> 00:14:16,410 Don't worry about it. 198 00:14:24,378 --> 00:14:26,797 I wanted to tell you something. 199 00:14:26,797 --> 00:14:28,422 What? 200 00:14:28,464 --> 00:14:34,134 I know we don't know each other that well or anything, but... 201 00:14:34,345 --> 00:14:35,720 But what? 202 00:14:38,767 --> 00:14:43,478 Today is gonna be the last time I can-- 203 00:14:43,521 --> 00:14:45,982 I'm mov-- 204 00:14:46,022 --> 00:14:47,860 Jeremiah Bruce, please come to the office. 205 00:14:47,900 --> 00:14:50,736 Jeremiah Bruce, come to the office immediately. 206 00:14:50,779 --> 00:14:52,532 Give me that microphone! 207 00:14:52,575 --> 00:14:54,949 Jeremiah Bruce! This is your mother! 208 00:14:54,949 --> 00:14:58,579 You are in big trouble, young man. 209 00:14:58,619 --> 00:15:01,498 What I found in the pocket of that stinky jacket of yours... 210 00:15:01,540 --> 00:15:03,500 has me more than livid. 211 00:15:03,500 --> 00:15:06,459 You get your little fanny out of that seat... 212 00:15:06,502 --> 00:15:09,464 and you meet me in the front office. 213 00:15:09,506 --> 00:15:11,009 How dare you do this! 214 00:15:11,049 --> 00:15:13,678 How dare you humiliate me after I work so hard for you! 215 00:15:13,720 --> 00:15:15,802 You take my hard-earned money... 216 00:15:15,845 --> 00:15:19,473 and you and your idiot friends spend it... 217 00:15:19,515 --> 00:15:21,435 on Kiss tickets?! 218 00:15:47,793 --> 00:15:49,170 Sit! 219 00:15:51,548 --> 00:15:52,884 You don't understand. 220 00:15:52,884 --> 00:15:54,676 Oh, I understand perfectly. 221 00:15:54,719 --> 00:15:57,386 And so will Father Philip McNulty. 222 00:15:57,428 --> 00:16:01,016 You're sending me to boarding school? 223 00:16:01,058 --> 00:16:02,518 What else can I do? 224 00:16:02,558 --> 00:16:05,980 Records, magazines, comic books, that's one thing... 225 00:16:06,022 --> 00:16:08,357 but tickets. 226 00:16:08,482 --> 00:16:10,776 Do you realize what this means? 227 00:16:10,816 --> 00:16:13,738 You are no longer content merely hearing their awful music... 228 00:16:13,738 --> 00:16:15,739 and looking at photos of their horrific faces. 229 00:16:15,739 --> 00:16:17,740 Now you want to see the devil in the flesh! 230 00:16:17,782 --> 00:16:20,785 You want to reach out and touch pure evil. 231 00:16:20,826 --> 00:16:22,664 And in Detroit, no less. 232 00:17:03,830 --> 00:17:06,500 It's been a long time coming... 233 00:17:06,542 --> 00:17:10,626 but you are finally going to get the discipline you deserve. 234 00:17:10,669 --> 00:17:11,753 But, Mom-- 235 00:17:11,795 --> 00:17:12,963 Shut up! 236 00:17:26,311 --> 00:17:27,438 I knew it. 237 00:17:27,479 --> 00:17:29,481 We're completely fucked. 238 00:17:29,481 --> 00:17:32,317 For once, Lex is right. 239 00:17:32,317 --> 00:17:33,942 Can't get any worse from here. 240 00:17:33,984 --> 00:17:37,489 I hope you rodents have hall passes. 241 00:17:37,531 --> 00:17:39,365 Fuck, it's Elvis! 242 00:17:40,576 --> 00:17:45,538 Could that be three detentions I smell? 243 00:17:45,580 --> 00:17:48,791 Second floor, girls bathroom. He'll never find us there. 244 00:17:57,675 --> 00:18:00,470 Fuck! Son of a bitch, man! 245 00:18:00,512 --> 00:18:01,805 Take it easy, man. 246 00:18:01,847 --> 00:18:03,305 This is the girls crapper, remember? 247 00:18:03,347 --> 00:18:04,556 Wake up, Lex! 248 00:18:04,598 --> 00:18:08,311 We just watched Jam's mom torch ourfucking Kiss tickets! 249 00:18:08,354 --> 00:18:10,356 Not REO Speedwagon... 250 00:18:10,396 --> 00:18:12,981 not Journey, not the Bay City Rollers. 251 00:18:13,023 --> 00:18:14,526 Kiss, man! 252 00:18:14,566 --> 00:18:17,403 If you know a better reason to trash a girls bathroom... 253 00:18:17,445 --> 00:18:19,447 I'd sure like to hear it. 254 00:18:20,156 --> 00:18:21,742 What the fuck are you doing? 255 00:18:21,784 --> 00:18:24,326 -This is school. -So what? 256 00:18:28,414 --> 00:18:29,874 I think we're clear, dudes. 257 00:18:32,753 --> 00:18:34,418 Let's go. 258 00:18:36,881 --> 00:18:39,134 -Shit. Girls, girls. -Shit. 259 00:19:05,077 --> 00:19:06,911 Sharon Van Hoft. 260 00:19:06,954 --> 00:19:09,999 I've had the hots for her since second grade. 261 00:19:17,839 --> 00:19:21,009 Man, I've never heard a girl blow ass before. 262 00:19:33,981 --> 00:19:35,442 Get the fuck out! 263 00:19:35,442 --> 00:19:36,941 Sorry. 264 00:19:53,667 --> 00:19:56,880 God forbid someday you have a son like you. 265 00:19:56,923 --> 00:19:58,922 A boy who lies through his teeth... 266 00:19:58,962 --> 00:20:00,757 buys demonic records... 267 00:20:00,798 --> 00:20:02,718 and smokes the dope. 268 00:20:36,671 --> 00:20:38,129 Sorry. Sorry. 269 00:20:45,511 --> 00:20:47,471 Anyone upfor an enema? 270 00:20:48,722 --> 00:20:49,975 Shit, man. 271 00:20:50,016 --> 00:20:52,686 Maybe some music will cheer us up. 272 00:20:55,856 --> 00:20:58,899 Simple Simon on the rock of Detroit... 273 00:20:58,942 --> 00:21:01,109 home of the biggest Kiss giveaway... 274 00:21:01,151 --> 00:21:02,945 in the history of the universe! 275 00:21:02,987 --> 00:21:04,822 I got four front-row tickets... 276 00:21:04,865 --> 00:21:06,950 along with four backstage passes... 277 00:21:06,992 --> 00:21:10,079 to the concert tonight at Cobo Hall... 278 00:21:10,121 --> 00:21:13,873 and I'm giving 'em to the 106th caller... 279 00:21:13,914 --> 00:21:17,126 who can tell me the real names of each Kiss band member. 280 00:21:17,168 --> 00:21:18,461 Oh, shit. 281 00:21:23,717 --> 00:21:25,510 This is horse shit. 282 00:21:25,552 --> 00:21:27,678 It's too bad we're stuck in this prison. 283 00:21:30,725 --> 00:21:31,851 I got it. 284 00:21:35,603 --> 00:21:38,733 Mr. Verudi, get back to your bench. 285 00:21:38,774 --> 00:21:41,903 I gotta take a leak like you would not believe. 286 00:21:41,944 --> 00:21:44,445 Put a clothespin on it till the end of class. 287 00:21:44,487 --> 00:21:45,613 But, Mr. J... 288 00:21:45,654 --> 00:21:48,491 ever since my doctor put me on these salt pills-- 289 00:21:48,532 --> 00:21:50,118 Salt pills? 290 00:21:50,160 --> 00:21:52,372 Don't insult my intelligence. 291 00:21:52,413 --> 00:21:56,918 Oh, man, I'm taking a leak in my pants. 292 00:22:02,924 --> 00:22:04,547 Get the hell out of here. 293 00:22:04,589 --> 00:22:06,051 You disgust me. 294 00:22:20,357 --> 00:22:23,861 I need to be connected to the WURP contest line. 295 00:22:23,904 --> 00:22:25,737 Now, lady, come on! 296 00:22:28,407 --> 00:22:30,407 Oh, yeah, man! 297 00:22:33,412 --> 00:22:34,664 I won! 298 00:22:34,704 --> 00:22:38,707 We! We won! 299 00:22:38,792 --> 00:22:41,378 We're going to Detroit! 300 00:22:47,676 --> 00:22:51,471 This is the greatest thing that ever happened to me in school. 301 00:22:51,514 --> 00:22:53,849 Not only are we on for Kiss in Detroit... 302 00:22:53,891 --> 00:22:57,644 but we're gonna be sitting front row, center, man. 303 00:22:57,686 --> 00:23:00,857 Guys, our band Mystery is a quartet, right? 304 00:23:00,897 --> 00:23:03,109 We can't go on the road without our drummer. 305 00:23:03,150 --> 00:23:05,779 Jam's mom said something about taking him to St. Bernard's. 306 00:23:05,821 --> 00:23:08,406 I say we bust him the hell out of there. 307 00:23:08,447 --> 00:23:11,032 St. Bernard's is in the next county. 308 00:23:11,075 --> 00:23:14,328 Your mom's car has a CB, radar detector... 309 00:23:14,370 --> 00:23:15,454 cruise control, check. 310 00:23:15,496 --> 00:23:18,038 We're not stealing my mom's car, OK? 311 00:23:18,080 --> 00:23:19,790 Damn right, we are, man. 312 00:23:19,833 --> 00:23:21,586 One ding on that Volvo... 313 00:23:21,627 --> 00:23:24,088 and I'm fucked when my mom gets back from Cincinnati. 314 00:23:24,131 --> 00:23:26,466 She won't even know we touched it. 315 00:23:26,508 --> 00:23:29,092 If one thing happens to the car, I'm blaming you. 316 00:23:29,134 --> 00:23:30,677 I'm gonna say you drugged me. 317 00:23:30,677 --> 00:23:32,013 I say we leave. 318 00:23:32,013 --> 00:23:33,805 Hold on. We're ditching school? 319 00:23:33,848 --> 00:23:35,601 About time if you ask me. 320 00:23:35,641 --> 00:23:37,728 I'm just going through the motions... 321 00:23:37,768 --> 00:23:39,729 till I'm old enough to drop out anyway. 322 00:23:39,770 --> 00:23:41,480 Shit. Guys, Elvis alert. 323 00:23:42,647 --> 00:23:45,401 I notice the trays match your outfits. 324 00:23:45,443 --> 00:23:47,154 Did you plan that? 325 00:23:50,072 --> 00:23:51,616 Excuse me, ladies. 326 00:23:52,451 --> 00:23:54,493 He stinks! 327 00:24:25,066 --> 00:24:26,693 I'm responsible for that! 328 00:25:03,396 --> 00:25:05,063 Pray hard, Jeremiah. 329 00:25:05,105 --> 00:25:07,109 God loves you. 330 00:25:07,316 --> 00:25:08,610 That he does. 331 00:25:08,652 --> 00:25:11,823 God bless you, Father McNulty. 332 00:25:20,079 --> 00:25:23,708 If you think that recklessness and disobedience... 333 00:25:23,749 --> 00:25:25,001 can get you expelled... 334 00:25:25,043 --> 00:25:26,460 think again. 335 00:25:26,503 --> 00:25:29,088 St. Bernard's may punish you... 336 00:25:29,131 --> 00:25:31,507 even for the slightest digression, but... 337 00:25:31,550 --> 00:25:34,677 it'll never cast you out, even for the largest. 338 00:25:34,719 --> 00:25:37,640 So, here you are, Jeremiah. 339 00:25:37,681 --> 00:25:39,767 Here to stay. 340 00:26:11,090 --> 00:26:13,927 Damn, man, come on. Let's go bust him out. 341 00:26:13,969 --> 00:26:16,552 No, man. We can't just waltz in there. 342 00:26:16,594 --> 00:26:18,512 We've gotta figure out a plan. 343 00:26:24,145 --> 00:26:26,103 The eagle's landed, you guys. 344 00:26:32,695 --> 00:26:36,406 You kids know where Philip McNutly's office is? 345 00:26:39,409 --> 00:26:40,744 You ordered a pizza? 346 00:26:40,786 --> 00:26:43,498 -What's the damage, young man? -Ten even. 347 00:26:50,505 --> 00:26:53,508 If he offers you a slice, you're not hungry. 348 00:26:55,719 --> 00:26:59,887 Ten dollars, and I'm donating your tip to the church. 349 00:26:59,930 --> 00:27:01,015 The Lord thanks you. 350 00:27:01,056 --> 00:27:03,560 Tell the big guy not to mention it. 351 00:27:03,600 --> 00:27:05,353 I am famished. 352 00:27:05,395 --> 00:27:08,731 Well, hope you brought a lunch for yourself. 353 00:27:08,772 --> 00:27:11,317 No, but I'm not hungry anyway. 354 00:27:11,359 --> 00:27:13,319 Oh, it finally speaks. 355 00:27:13,402 --> 00:27:15,572 There's one barrier we've broken through. 356 00:27:24,372 --> 00:27:28,833 Your coming here reminds me of the Prodigal Son. 357 00:27:28,876 --> 00:27:32,546 Once, there was a man, and he had two sons. 358 00:27:32,589 --> 00:27:35,718 They both grew up on the farm with him. 359 00:27:35,759 --> 00:27:38,429 One day-- 360 00:27:56,571 --> 00:28:00,406 That was a very stale mushroom. 361 00:28:00,449 --> 00:28:01,909 Well... 362 00:28:01,950 --> 00:28:03,452 where was l? 363 00:28:03,452 --> 00:28:05,956 Man, come on, this is such a lousy view. 364 00:28:05,956 --> 00:28:08,792 How are we supposed to know when he's lit? 365 00:28:08,833 --> 00:28:11,835 It usually takes ten minutes to half an hour. 366 00:28:11,878 --> 00:28:13,087 All depends, you know? 367 00:28:18,635 --> 00:28:19,929 He's lit. 368 00:28:26,476 --> 00:28:29,897 I've been telling that sermon for years. 369 00:28:29,939 --> 00:28:32,064 This is the first time I've realized... 370 00:28:32,105 --> 00:28:36,027 it's the work of some comedy mastermind. 371 00:28:36,070 --> 00:28:40,908 The Prodigal Son is a barrel of fuckin' monkeys. 372 00:28:40,951 --> 00:28:42,115 Wait, wait! 373 00:28:42,157 --> 00:28:44,118 You kids can't go in there. 374 00:28:44,159 --> 00:28:47,539 No, it's OK. We're old buds of Father McNulty's. 375 00:28:47,579 --> 00:28:48,958 How's it hangin', padre? 376 00:28:48,999 --> 00:28:52,626 I just heard you talking through my nose. 377 00:28:52,669 --> 00:28:56,464 Is it possible my nose has eardrums? 378 00:28:56,506 --> 00:28:58,049 Nosedrums. 379 00:28:59,175 --> 00:29:01,971 We're here to take ourfriend Jam... 380 00:29:02,013 --> 00:29:06,432 to the big satanic Kiss concert tonight if that's OK with you. 381 00:29:06,474 --> 00:29:08,310 Satan? Satan? 382 00:29:08,351 --> 00:29:09,478 Santa. 383 00:29:11,771 --> 00:29:14,356 They're the same letters. They're the same guy. 384 00:29:14,399 --> 00:29:17,068 It's the same friggin' guy. 385 00:29:17,110 --> 00:29:19,655 What the hell are you doing, Sister Gonorrhea? 386 00:29:19,697 --> 00:29:21,490 Waitin' for a bus? 387 00:29:46,681 --> 00:29:49,643 You'll still get rowdy with the girls and boys 388 00:29:49,684 --> 00:29:53,857 'Cause it's time for you to take a stand 389 00:29:53,899 --> 00:29:55,690 Yeah, whoo 390 00:29:55,732 --> 00:29:58,109 Shout it, shout it 391 00:29:58,151 --> 00:30:01,030 Shout it out loud 392 00:30:01,071 --> 00:30:02,907 You've got to have a party 393 00:30:02,948 --> 00:30:05,867 Shout it, shout it 394 00:30:05,909 --> 00:30:07,453 Shout it out loud 395 00:30:08,995 --> 00:30:10,581 Whoa, dudes, man. 396 00:30:10,664 --> 00:30:12,833 I just had the killerest vision, man. 397 00:30:12,875 --> 00:30:15,462 Imagine Mystery... 398 00:30:15,503 --> 00:30:18,380 opening up for Kiss, man. 399 00:30:18,380 --> 00:30:20,050 Oh, that'd be fucking it. 400 00:30:20,091 --> 00:30:23,511 Yeah, man. It could happen, man. 401 00:30:23,553 --> 00:30:27,721 You know, in '73, Kiss was opening for Blue Oyster Cult. 402 00:30:27,765 --> 00:30:30,058 One year later to the day, man... 403 00:30:30,100 --> 00:30:32,894 Blue Oyster Cult was opening for Kiss. 404 00:30:32,937 --> 00:30:34,438 We're not opening for anybody... 405 00:30:34,480 --> 00:30:37,065 until our lead singer gets over his stage fright. 406 00:30:37,107 --> 00:30:38,609 God, man. 407 00:30:38,609 --> 00:30:40,735 I don't have fucking stage fright, Lex. 408 00:30:40,777 --> 00:30:42,821 Then why'd you pass out on stage at Bing's party... 409 00:30:42,863 --> 00:30:44,115 before the first fucking song? 410 00:30:44,156 --> 00:30:46,701 That was one show, man. 411 00:30:46,743 --> 00:30:49,745 That was our only show, and you dropped like a dead deer on us. 412 00:30:49,745 --> 00:30:50,913 Shut up. 413 00:30:54,459 --> 00:30:56,086 I'm solid gold 414 00:30:56,127 --> 00:30:57,880 I got the goods 415 00:30:57,919 --> 00:31:01,631 They stare when I walk through the neighborhood 416 00:31:01,673 --> 00:31:03,676 I'm makin' it 417 00:31:03,717 --> 00:31:07,682 I got the chance, I'm takin' it 418 00:31:07,723 --> 00:31:09,389 No more, no more 419 00:31:09,431 --> 00:31:11,392 Fakin' it 420 00:31:11,474 --> 00:31:12,643 This time in life 421 00:31:12,686 --> 00:31:14,938 I'm takin' it 422 00:31:14,980 --> 00:31:16,814 Woo woo woo 423 00:31:16,856 --> 00:31:18,525 Makin' it 424 00:31:19,232 --> 00:31:21,068 Gimme this pizza. 425 00:31:22,069 --> 00:31:23,655 It's the last piece. 426 00:31:23,697 --> 00:31:25,699 It's mine, all right? 427 00:31:28,035 --> 00:31:31,078 Fuck, man. Only a car full of Stellas and Guidos... 428 00:31:31,120 --> 00:31:33,789 would ride your ass on a two-lane highway and honk. 429 00:31:33,831 --> 00:31:35,791 Oh, man. 430 00:31:35,834 --> 00:31:39,504 Listen, everyone here 431 00:31:39,547 --> 00:31:41,005 This coming year's gonna 432 00:31:41,046 --> 00:31:42,632 Be my year 433 00:31:42,673 --> 00:31:44,426 I'm as bad as they come 434 00:31:44,467 --> 00:31:46,093 Number two to no one 435 00:31:46,135 --> 00:31:47,971 I got looks, I got brains 436 00:31:48,013 --> 00:31:50,556 And I'm breaking these chains 437 00:31:50,598 --> 00:31:52,683 Throw that shit out before it stains the up-- 438 00:31:52,726 --> 00:31:55,395 Throw it out of the car, you asshole! 439 00:31:55,437 --> 00:31:56,812 Come on, man! 440 00:31:58,398 --> 00:32:00,151 I'm makin' it 441 00:32:04,361 --> 00:32:06,323 Oh, fuck, man. 442 00:32:06,365 --> 00:32:08,867 Kenny, you asshole, you just killed a bird. 443 00:32:08,867 --> 00:32:09,994 That's no bird. 444 00:32:10,036 --> 00:32:12,995 That's a hunk of fuckin' cheese, Kenny. 445 00:32:13,038 --> 00:32:14,872 A hunk of fuckin' cheese? 446 00:32:14,914 --> 00:32:17,500 We just pissed off the lncredible Hulk... 447 00:32:17,541 --> 00:32:20,547 his idiot half brother, and two circus clowns. 448 00:32:20,588 --> 00:32:22,838 I'm gonna fuckin' kill these bastards. 449 00:32:27,177 --> 00:32:29,012 Pull the fuckin' car over! 450 00:32:30,513 --> 00:32:32,015 I'm gonna fuckin'-- Pull over! 451 00:32:32,058 --> 00:32:33,181 No way, man. 452 00:32:33,390 --> 00:32:34,852 You're dead! 453 00:32:34,893 --> 00:32:36,520 Suck my cock! 454 00:32:36,562 --> 00:32:38,438 You should pull over and apologize. 455 00:32:38,480 --> 00:32:40,440 This motherfucker's dead! 456 00:32:44,026 --> 00:32:45,778 The paint! 457 00:32:47,030 --> 00:32:48,573 Fuck! 458 00:32:49,909 --> 00:32:51,035 Pull over! 459 00:33:05,507 --> 00:33:07,759 Out of the car. 460 00:33:07,802 --> 00:33:08,927 Fuck. 461 00:33:11,763 --> 00:33:13,892 Oh, shit! God-- 462 00:33:17,602 --> 00:33:20,606 Oh, God! Aah, shit! 463 00:33:21,941 --> 00:33:24,152 That's not funny, Kenny. 464 00:33:24,360 --> 00:33:25,484 Oh, God! 465 00:33:30,115 --> 00:33:32,410 Oh, that's not very nice, man. 466 00:33:32,451 --> 00:33:34,705 You are a complete asshole, Kenny. 467 00:33:39,542 --> 00:33:41,002 Not the fag music. 468 00:33:41,084 --> 00:33:42,795 Get out of the way. 469 00:33:42,837 --> 00:33:44,715 Cut it with the macho crap already. 470 00:33:45,963 --> 00:33:47,924 This is about pizza, man. 471 00:33:47,966 --> 00:33:51,095 Can we try and leave Kiss out of it? 472 00:33:51,137 --> 00:33:55,434 What, a bunch of guys who make bad music... 473 00:33:55,475 --> 00:33:56,807 dress like freaks... 474 00:33:56,849 --> 00:33:59,060 and wear more makeup than all my sisters combined? 475 00:33:59,102 --> 00:34:02,480 No. These assholes gotta be stopped. 476 00:34:04,943 --> 00:34:06,944 That's it. I'm leaving. 477 00:34:08,613 --> 00:34:09,738 Christine. 478 00:34:10,781 --> 00:34:12,742 Jesus. 479 00:34:13,576 --> 00:34:15,704 You googats in the head or something? 480 00:34:15,746 --> 00:34:17,703 We're on the side of the freakin' highway. 481 00:34:17,703 --> 00:34:18,830 Fuck her. 482 00:34:18,872 --> 00:34:22,627 Kool and the Gang, that's music. 483 00:34:22,669 --> 00:34:23,795 But this? 484 00:34:23,837 --> 00:34:25,547 This is crap. 485 00:34:25,588 --> 00:34:26,715 That's crap. 486 00:34:36,725 --> 00:34:37,852 All right, fag-mo. 487 00:34:37,893 --> 00:34:40,394 Have you learned your lesson yet, puke? 488 00:34:40,435 --> 00:34:41,938 Well... 489 00:34:42,021 --> 00:34:46,776 if the lesson is that you're a dick with ears... 490 00:34:46,817 --> 00:34:48,111 and a really bad haircut... 491 00:34:48,153 --> 00:34:50,864 I'd say yeah, I learned my lesson. 492 00:34:51,989 --> 00:34:54,909 -Break his fucking legs, Kenny. -Fuckin'-- 493 00:35:26,065 --> 00:35:29,027 Come on, we can talk about this, right? 494 00:35:29,069 --> 00:35:32,113 You know, maybe reason a little bit. 495 00:35:37,912 --> 00:35:40,623 When these guys wake up, they're gonna look for you. 496 00:35:40,664 --> 00:35:42,039 You best hope they don't find you... 497 00:35:42,080 --> 00:35:44,751 'cause if they do, they're gonna kick your asses. 498 00:35:44,792 --> 00:35:47,921 Oh, yeah, Stella. And we'll deserve it, too. 499 00:35:47,963 --> 00:35:50,008 But you know what I'm gonna do? 500 00:35:50,050 --> 00:35:52,885 I'm gonna make it really worth their while. 501 00:35:57,764 --> 00:35:58,891 Oh, God! 502 00:36:08,066 --> 00:36:10,111 Thanks for letting us use your makeup supply. 503 00:36:10,319 --> 00:36:12,694 You must have the entire Revlon factory in your purse... 504 00:36:12,737 --> 00:36:14,906 you greasy disco ball. 505 00:36:14,948 --> 00:36:16,366 Very funny. 506 00:36:16,407 --> 00:36:18,576 I hope you fuckin' choke to death and die... 507 00:36:18,618 --> 00:36:20,079 you loser-ass motherfuckers! 508 00:36:20,121 --> 00:36:21,413 Disco sucks! 509 00:36:21,456 --> 00:36:23,122 Fuck you! 510 00:36:23,331 --> 00:36:25,583 Fuck! Fuck! 511 00:36:27,044 --> 00:36:29,339 They put the fag makeup on you. 512 00:36:29,380 --> 00:36:30,797 They put the fag makeup on? 513 00:36:30,840 --> 00:36:32,800 The fuckin' fag makeup's on you. 514 00:36:34,968 --> 00:36:38,347 Oh, no. I got fag makeup on me. 515 00:36:51,153 --> 00:36:53,155 Hey, look. It's that girl. 516 00:36:53,363 --> 00:36:55,948 Man, that's no girl. That's a Stella. 517 00:36:55,989 --> 00:36:58,367 Yeah, well, Stella or no Stella... 518 00:36:58,409 --> 00:37:00,410 we should pull over and help her out. 519 00:37:00,451 --> 00:37:02,621 Fuckin' inbred oaf. 520 00:37:02,663 --> 00:37:05,707 Kenny. Fuck you. 521 00:37:05,748 --> 00:37:07,460 Fuckin' kick your ass. 522 00:37:07,501 --> 00:37:09,712 Man, what the hell is wrong with you? 523 00:37:09,753 --> 00:37:11,839 You got a thing for that thing? 524 00:37:11,881 --> 00:37:14,842 It's a teenage girl walking along the side of the highway. 525 00:37:14,842 --> 00:37:19,389 They make scary movies that start out like that. 526 00:37:19,430 --> 00:37:21,933 Hey, but they make porno movies... 527 00:37:21,975 --> 00:37:23,851 that start out like that, too, man. 528 00:37:44,038 --> 00:37:47,415 Oh, great. Just hitched a ride with a bunch of potheads. 529 00:37:47,415 --> 00:37:49,960 Look, I'm trying to hook up with some people... 530 00:37:50,002 --> 00:37:52,797 at this funky place in Detroit called Disco lnferno. 531 00:37:52,838 --> 00:37:54,841 You mind dropping me there? 532 00:37:54,883 --> 00:37:56,510 What's it worth to you? 533 00:37:56,552 --> 00:37:58,677 What the hell is that supposed to mean? 534 00:37:58,719 --> 00:38:01,138 It doesn't mean anything. Don't pay attention to him. 535 00:38:01,180 --> 00:38:03,432 It's more like Disco's lnfernal. 536 00:38:03,473 --> 00:38:05,102 Ooh, you hot baby, you. 537 00:38:05,311 --> 00:38:08,686 You know, your clothes may say disco... 538 00:38:08,729 --> 00:38:10,898 but your eyes say rock and roll. 539 00:38:12,609 --> 00:38:15,570 Well, your belt buckle may say rock and roll... 540 00:38:15,612 --> 00:38:19,699 but your breath says pepperoni, baby. 541 00:38:20,950 --> 00:38:22,994 Are you gonna, like, suck our dicks, or what? 542 00:38:23,036 --> 00:38:24,370 What? 543 00:38:24,411 --> 00:38:26,581 -That's so fuckin' rude, man. -Fuck you, Jam. 544 00:38:26,623 --> 00:38:29,749 Stop being a wussy sensitive guy just to impress her. 545 00:38:29,791 --> 00:38:32,336 She's obviously not gonna put out, man. 546 00:38:32,377 --> 00:38:34,756 She's a tease, man. 547 00:38:34,797 --> 00:38:38,136 A tease? What the hell did I do to tease you mongoloids? 548 00:38:38,344 --> 00:38:40,428 You got in the fuckin' car, didn't you? 549 00:38:40,470 --> 00:38:42,012 How calculating of me to lead you on like that... 550 00:38:42,054 --> 00:38:43,890 after you offered me a ride in the middle of nowhere. 551 00:38:43,932 --> 00:38:45,892 Whatever, Stella. 552 00:38:45,934 --> 00:38:48,061 My name's Christine. Not Stella. 553 00:38:48,102 --> 00:38:50,856 You don't have to be such pigs 'cause I prefer Donna Summer... 554 00:38:50,897 --> 00:38:55,444 or K.C. and the Sunshine Band or the Village People over Kiss. 555 00:38:55,485 --> 00:38:57,779 Fuckin' Village People. They're a fag band. 556 00:38:57,821 --> 00:38:59,073 They take it up the coast. 557 00:38:59,114 --> 00:39:01,824 All right, all right, guys. 558 00:39:01,866 --> 00:39:04,453 Thanks, but I can take care of myself, Germ. 559 00:39:05,996 --> 00:39:07,081 Whatever. 560 00:39:07,289 --> 00:39:09,917 OK, dope burnout, let's get one thing straight here. 561 00:39:09,959 --> 00:39:13,086 As far as I'm concerned, good tunes is good tunes. 562 00:39:13,294 --> 00:39:15,464 Disco or rock or polka or whatever have you... 563 00:39:15,505 --> 00:39:17,340 regardless of the category. 564 00:39:17,382 --> 00:39:19,719 Disco is just easier to dance to. 565 00:39:19,762 --> 00:39:23,096 You call that Denny Terio, John Travolta shit dancing? 566 00:39:23,304 --> 00:39:26,349 You know something? Disco's so fucking big now... 567 00:39:26,391 --> 00:39:29,519 I wouldn't be surprised if Kiss did a disco song someday. 568 00:39:29,562 --> 00:39:31,687 If it's one thing Kiss will never do... 569 00:39:31,728 --> 00:39:33,105 it's a bullshit disco song. 570 00:39:33,105 --> 00:39:34,649 No shit, man. 571 00:39:34,691 --> 00:39:38,780 Yeah. Disco blows dogs for quarters, man. 572 00:39:38,821 --> 00:39:40,114 That's an intelligently biting remark... 573 00:39:40,322 --> 00:39:41,616 wrought with wit and irony. 574 00:39:41,657 --> 00:39:43,115 If you don't like that one... 575 00:39:43,324 --> 00:39:44,658 maybe you'll think it's really funny... 576 00:39:44,658 --> 00:39:47,496 when we kick your fuckin' ass out of the car. 577 00:39:47,496 --> 00:39:49,624 Why don't you put your money where your mouth is? 578 00:39:49,665 --> 00:39:51,669 Why don't you lick my hairy crack? 579 00:39:51,710 --> 00:39:55,336 Why don't you bend over? You're looking right at it. 580 00:39:57,631 --> 00:40:00,634 That last remark fell about thirty yards away... 581 00:40:00,675 --> 00:40:03,427 from making any sense whatsoever. 582 00:40:03,468 --> 00:40:05,639 You're right. 583 00:40:05,680 --> 00:40:07,474 Bend over, you're looking right at it? 584 00:40:07,517 --> 00:40:09,811 What the hell is that supposed to mean anyway? 585 00:40:11,981 --> 00:40:14,063 Give me a hit off that "J," will ya? 586 00:40:14,105 --> 00:40:15,815 That's some kick-ass shit. 587 00:41:09,453 --> 00:41:11,080 Move out of my way! 588 00:41:11,121 --> 00:41:14,709 Lex, thank you for letting us borrow your mom's car, man. 589 00:41:14,751 --> 00:41:17,126 Man, that weed knocked her straight on her ass. 590 00:41:17,168 --> 00:41:19,464 She's sleeping like a baby Stella. 591 00:41:19,505 --> 00:41:21,883 Man, let's lift up her skirt. 592 00:41:21,924 --> 00:41:23,927 -There it is! -What? 593 00:41:23,969 --> 00:41:27,512 Holy fuck! We made it. Oh, my God. 594 00:41:30,933 --> 00:41:32,810 Oh, my God! Thank you! 595 00:41:37,606 --> 00:41:38,733 Man. 596 00:41:41,444 --> 00:41:44,573 I'm going into swarm-o mode. 597 00:41:44,614 --> 00:41:45,782 Oh, shit! 598 00:41:52,706 --> 00:41:54,917 I'm the King of the Nighttime World! 599 00:41:56,751 --> 00:41:58,502 This is better than the first time... 600 00:41:58,543 --> 00:42:00,880 I got to finger a chick, man. 601 00:42:03,132 --> 00:42:04,467 It's happening, man! 602 00:42:04,509 --> 00:42:05,595 WURP! 603 00:42:05,636 --> 00:42:07,430 This is so lucky. 604 00:42:07,471 --> 00:42:09,554 We got two hours to spare! 605 00:42:09,597 --> 00:42:12,726 -Check out that parking space. -Get in there! 606 00:42:12,767 --> 00:42:15,980 Ample time to go to the station and grab our tickets. 607 00:42:16,021 --> 00:42:18,650 God is smiling down upon us tonight. 608 00:42:18,692 --> 00:42:22,484 That's weird. I figured he'd be pissed as hell at me. 609 00:42:28,033 --> 00:42:29,950 Fuck, yeah! 610 00:42:29,991 --> 00:42:31,368 Oh, baby! 611 00:42:34,540 --> 00:42:36,792 This is so awesome, man. 612 00:42:36,834 --> 00:42:38,627 No way, man! 613 00:42:38,669 --> 00:42:40,419 I can't wait! 614 00:42:40,461 --> 00:42:42,046 We're going to Kiss 615 00:42:47,469 --> 00:42:48,846 Let's get out of here, man. 616 00:42:49,681 --> 00:42:52,432 -Simple Simon? -The one and only. 617 00:42:54,017 --> 00:42:55,644 You kids have to hurry this up. 618 00:42:55,685 --> 00:42:57,980 I'm due at Cobo Hall in a half hourfor the warmup. 619 00:42:58,022 --> 00:42:59,397 We're right behind you, Simon. 620 00:42:59,440 --> 00:43:02,775 We want to thank you in advance for those burly-ass ticks. 621 00:43:02,816 --> 00:43:04,569 Your name isn't Trip, is it? 622 00:43:04,610 --> 00:43:06,530 Oh, no. My name's Trip. 623 00:43:06,572 --> 00:43:08,615 Remember? We were talking on the phone? 624 00:43:10,577 --> 00:43:11,992 Go, caller. 625 00:43:12,035 --> 00:43:14,787 Eugene Klein, Stanley Eisen... 626 00:43:14,828 --> 00:43:17,874 Peter Crisscoula, and Paul Frehley. 627 00:43:17,915 --> 00:43:19,835 You just got yourself four tickets... 628 00:43:19,877 --> 00:43:21,755 and four backstage passes... 629 00:43:23,672 --> 00:43:25,966 -...at Cobo Hall tonight! -We won! 630 00:43:25,966 --> 00:43:29,053 Stay on the line so we can get yourfull name... 631 00:43:29,095 --> 00:43:31,722 Trip? You didn't hang up on me, did you, Tri-- 632 00:43:31,765 --> 00:43:33,807 What kind of total moron... 633 00:43:33,849 --> 00:43:36,519 would hang up after winning Kiss tickets? 634 00:43:36,561 --> 00:43:39,605 Well, there you have it. We had no choice. 635 00:43:39,648 --> 00:43:41,065 We gave the tickets to the next caller. 636 00:43:41,107 --> 00:43:42,651 I'm sorry. 637 00:43:52,786 --> 00:43:54,410 Relax! 638 00:43:54,452 --> 00:43:55,704 Get off of him! 639 00:44:09,175 --> 00:44:10,300 This noise machine... 640 00:44:10,343 --> 00:44:13,597 is more than just a quartet of lousy musicians. 641 00:44:13,639 --> 00:44:17,015 There's a woman who abuses her privilege of motherhood. 642 00:44:17,015 --> 00:44:19,894 -What is Kiss backwards? -Ssik! 643 00:44:22,021 --> 00:44:23,148 Oh, shit! 644 00:44:23,189 --> 00:44:25,107 Guys, where's the Volvo? 645 00:44:25,107 --> 00:44:28,277 It was fucking stolen, man. 646 00:44:28,318 --> 00:44:30,320 Christine stole it. Sleep, my ass. 647 00:44:30,363 --> 00:44:32,323 The Stella booted with your mom's wheels. 648 00:44:32,323 --> 00:44:34,869 Son of a bitch, man! How can this happen? 649 00:44:34,910 --> 00:44:36,326 Why are you laughing? 650 00:44:36,368 --> 00:44:38,036 I'm starting to get real mad. 651 00:44:38,079 --> 00:44:39,497 Jam, you ass! 652 00:44:39,540 --> 00:44:42,167 Why'd you talk us into picking up this bitch? 653 00:44:42,209 --> 00:44:45,004 I'm sorry, man. I was trying to be nice. 654 00:44:45,046 --> 00:44:46,211 I'm sick of your nice shit! 655 00:44:46,211 --> 00:44:48,673 Drummers are supposed to have some fucking balls. 656 00:44:48,715 --> 00:44:51,217 Fuck you, man. I was being conscientious. 657 00:44:51,260 --> 00:44:53,887 I didn't think she was going to steal his mom's car. 658 00:44:53,929 --> 00:44:56,638 Jam, just shut your faggotty-ass mouth, OK? 659 00:44:56,680 --> 00:44:58,099 You're pissing me off. 660 00:44:58,141 --> 00:45:00,100 Now, we came all this way... 661 00:45:00,142 --> 00:45:02,186 we got an hour and forty-five minutes... 662 00:45:02,228 --> 00:45:05,232 and we got absolutely nothing. 663 00:45:05,274 --> 00:45:09,277 So help me, God, we are going to that concert. 664 00:45:09,318 --> 00:45:12,489 We must get the cops in on this Volvo situation. 665 00:45:12,530 --> 00:45:15,034 Lex, this is Detroit. 666 00:45:15,075 --> 00:45:18,411 You think the cops will waste city dollars on a Swedish car? 667 00:45:19,412 --> 00:45:20,371 You're right. 668 00:45:20,413 --> 00:45:22,374 My mom's got insurance. 669 00:45:22,416 --> 00:45:24,001 Why am I freaking out? 670 00:45:24,085 --> 00:45:26,003 It's cool. She's gonna try to ground me for a year. 671 00:45:26,045 --> 00:45:27,129 I don't give a shit, man. 672 00:45:27,172 --> 00:45:28,587 Exactly. Cool, bro. 673 00:45:28,629 --> 00:45:31,423 Oh, shit! Man, I'm in big trouble! 674 00:45:31,423 --> 00:45:34,094 I'm in big fucking trouble! The car's gone, man! 675 00:45:34,136 --> 00:45:35,639 Shut the fuck up, man! 676 00:45:35,679 --> 00:45:37,391 We're trying to think! 677 00:45:37,432 --> 00:45:39,182 Wait a second, man. 678 00:45:39,223 --> 00:45:41,267 I know how we can get the fucking tickets, man. 679 00:45:41,351 --> 00:45:44,396 We beat the fucking shit out of four little kids. 680 00:45:44,437 --> 00:45:46,440 Like, take their fuckin' tickets. 681 00:45:46,482 --> 00:45:48,941 Brilliance, Trip. Sheer fuckin' brilliance. 682 00:45:48,983 --> 00:45:51,070 Why don't you give Albert Einstein here... 683 00:45:51,111 --> 00:45:53,989 the fuckin' Nobel Prize?! 684 00:45:55,032 --> 00:45:58,411 Look, I think I can barter with a scalper. 685 00:45:58,453 --> 00:46:01,121 If you guys can think of a better plan, go for it. 686 00:46:01,162 --> 00:46:03,959 For the next hour and a half, it's every dude for himself. 687 00:46:03,959 --> 00:46:07,379 We'll reconvene at that intersection at 8:45. 688 00:46:07,420 --> 00:46:10,129 I'll see you guys later. Good luck. 689 00:46:10,129 --> 00:46:12,173 I don't know what the fuck we're doing. 690 00:46:14,468 --> 00:46:17,304 Look around you tonight, mothers. 691 00:46:17,304 --> 00:46:20,557 Look at all the young faces. 692 00:46:20,598 --> 00:46:23,435 Oh, they smile and they laugh... 693 00:46:23,476 --> 00:46:25,980 but their eyes have lost all hope. 694 00:46:26,020 --> 00:46:28,065 This satanic group Kiss... 695 00:46:28,108 --> 00:46:30,983 has stolen their souls! 696 00:46:31,693 --> 00:46:32,987 We-- 697 00:46:34,489 --> 00:46:36,949 Shit. 698 00:46:43,455 --> 00:46:46,208 I do not know how you got here tonight... 699 00:46:46,250 --> 00:46:48,086 and I do not want to know. 700 00:46:48,129 --> 00:46:49,671 All I know is... 701 00:46:49,879 --> 00:46:53,340 you are going to pay dearly for this one, young man. 702 00:47:15,029 --> 00:47:16,196 Oh, my God. 703 00:47:16,196 --> 00:47:18,199 The mass, Father-- so inspirational. 704 00:47:18,199 --> 00:47:19,327 Father, thank you. 705 00:47:19,367 --> 00:47:20,494 Come again next week. 706 00:47:20,535 --> 00:47:21,621 Father. 707 00:47:21,662 --> 00:47:23,369 It's Jeremiah. 708 00:47:23,411 --> 00:47:24,997 I'm desperate. 709 00:47:25,039 --> 00:47:27,208 My son was about to defy God... 710 00:47:27,249 --> 00:47:29,335 by going to that blasphemous Kiss concert. 711 00:47:29,377 --> 00:47:32,381 In that case, come right in. 712 00:47:32,381 --> 00:47:35,300 He and his mom just went into that church. 713 00:47:35,342 --> 00:47:37,552 Can I go and say good-bye to him? 714 00:47:37,594 --> 00:47:41,890 Beth, I am not gonna let you wander the streets after dark. 715 00:47:41,932 --> 00:47:45,601 I'm not going to wander. I'm just going over there. 716 00:47:45,643 --> 00:47:48,563 Fine. As long as we know where you are. 717 00:47:48,563 --> 00:47:49,689 Thank you. 718 00:47:49,898 --> 00:47:52,901 Don't be too long. We need to get back on the road. 719 00:47:52,943 --> 00:47:55,402 -Stuart. -Just relax. 720 00:47:55,402 --> 00:47:59,491 She's probably got a crush on the kid or something. 721 00:48:06,957 --> 00:48:08,457 Hey, chief, need a ticket? 722 00:48:08,541 --> 00:48:12,212 Second row, center, but it's seventy-five clams. 723 00:48:12,255 --> 00:48:15,049 Aw, man, this is all I got. Look. 724 00:48:16,297 --> 00:48:18,176 Scare up the extra gravy. 725 00:48:18,218 --> 00:48:19,387 Brother, take it easy. 726 00:48:19,428 --> 00:48:22,889 Where am I supposed to find that kind of money in an hour? 727 00:48:24,600 --> 00:48:27,560 Well, um... check it out over there. 728 00:48:27,601 --> 00:48:28,936 There's a contest going on. 729 00:48:28,978 --> 00:48:32,064 You take off your pants, shake your wee-wee, get $100. 730 00:48:32,107 --> 00:48:36,028 I can't take off my clothes and dance like that, man. 731 00:48:36,070 --> 00:48:38,863 That's embarrassing, man. 732 00:48:38,904 --> 00:48:40,408 Check it out, man. 733 00:48:40,449 --> 00:48:42,492 The question you got to ask yourself is... 734 00:48:42,534 --> 00:48:44,035 how badly do you want to see... 735 00:48:44,077 --> 00:48:46,163 the greatest fucking rock-and-roll show... 736 00:48:46,205 --> 00:48:47,580 on the fucking earth, right? 737 00:48:47,621 --> 00:48:50,583 You're talkin' Gene and Paul live, y'all. 738 00:48:50,624 --> 00:48:53,253 I'm talkin' about voluptuous women in the audience. 739 00:48:53,295 --> 00:48:56,549 I'm talkin' big breastesses in tight vestesses, my friend. 740 00:48:56,592 --> 00:48:59,341 You're talkin' people passin' around joints in the audience. 741 00:48:59,383 --> 00:49:02,805 You're talkin' about Detroit Rock City, brother. 742 00:49:02,847 --> 00:49:04,223 Shake your wee-wee. 743 00:49:04,265 --> 00:49:06,349 I got stage fright. 744 00:49:07,144 --> 00:49:09,102 And they're playing fucking disco over there. 745 00:49:09,144 --> 00:49:11,271 Shit or get off the pot, rock star. 746 00:49:11,313 --> 00:49:12,564 You want to dance? 747 00:49:12,607 --> 00:49:15,942 Or see Kiss on album covers for the rest of your life? 748 00:49:18,320 --> 00:49:20,363 Mmm, second row, center, brother. 749 00:49:20,405 --> 00:49:21,823 Go shake your wee-wee. 750 00:49:21,865 --> 00:49:23,492 You're gonna have that ticket for me, right? 751 00:49:23,533 --> 00:49:26,245 Oh, yeah, man, you got my solemn oath... 752 00:49:26,287 --> 00:49:28,581 as a public servant. 753 00:49:31,999 --> 00:49:33,419 Go for it, brother. 754 00:49:34,462 --> 00:49:36,255 All right. 755 00:49:36,297 --> 00:49:37,548 See you around. 756 00:49:42,010 --> 00:49:44,554 Hey, chief, you need a ticket? 757 00:49:44,596 --> 00:49:47,140 Seventy-five bucks, second row, center. 758 00:49:47,183 --> 00:49:48,645 I'm gonna beat my ticket... 759 00:49:48,894 --> 00:49:50,560 out of some poor defenseless chump. 760 00:49:50,602 --> 00:49:52,312 You know what I mean? 761 00:49:52,355 --> 00:49:53,563 Yeah, whatever, reefer-head. 762 00:49:53,606 --> 00:49:56,024 You fuckin' burnout. 763 00:50:27,180 --> 00:50:28,559 Take it off, honey! 764 00:50:43,739 --> 00:50:45,031 Gimme! 765 00:50:47,744 --> 00:50:49,037 Don't do that. 766 00:50:54,624 --> 00:50:57,295 I need to sign up for the contest, please. 767 00:50:57,336 --> 00:50:59,590 You're a little scrawny, but thanks to the concert... 768 00:50:59,590 --> 00:51:01,174 we're low on amateurs. Name? 769 00:51:02,092 --> 00:51:03,426 Pick a song, Hawk. 770 00:51:03,426 --> 00:51:05,136 You got any Kiss? 771 00:51:05,179 --> 00:51:07,097 Doubtful. Drink? 772 00:51:07,139 --> 00:51:08,432 Yeah. A man's drink. 773 00:51:12,936 --> 00:51:14,102 Oh, God. 774 00:51:17,315 --> 00:51:18,442 What's this? 775 00:51:18,483 --> 00:51:21,028 You've never seen a bourbon on the rocks before? 776 00:51:23,072 --> 00:51:24,404 Save your money, stud muffin. 777 00:51:24,446 --> 00:51:27,407 Lady at the end of the bar sends her love. 778 00:51:36,376 --> 00:51:39,545 Oh. Shit. 779 00:51:41,965 --> 00:51:43,091 Cheers. 780 00:51:50,641 --> 00:51:52,060 God! 781 00:51:53,185 --> 00:51:55,645 It's gone bad. 782 00:52:12,371 --> 00:52:13,664 Hey, you little twerps. 783 00:52:13,872 --> 00:52:16,666 Give me your Kiss tickets, or I'll pop yourfaces in. 784 00:52:16,666 --> 00:52:18,544 But we don't have any Kiss tickets. 785 00:52:18,585 --> 00:52:20,337 Yeah. Kiss sucks! 786 00:52:20,380 --> 00:52:22,464 What? I ought to kick your asses for saying that. 787 00:52:22,506 --> 00:52:26,177 Give me this instead. Now scram! Get out of here! 788 00:52:32,516 --> 00:52:33,643 Cool. 789 00:52:43,484 --> 00:52:45,362 Simple Simon comin' at you. 790 00:52:45,362 --> 00:52:49,159 It's thirty minutes and counting until Kiss hits the stage... 791 00:52:49,199 --> 00:52:51,659 tonight at Detroit's very own Cobo Hall... 792 00:52:51,702 --> 00:52:55,582 but until then, here they are with "Shock Me"! 793 00:52:55,622 --> 00:52:57,168 Rock on, Ace! 794 00:53:22,648 --> 00:53:24,526 Hey, little kid! 795 00:53:24,568 --> 00:53:26,945 Shit! You just stumped my last ball, you-- 796 00:53:26,988 --> 00:53:28,363 Scream and I'll kick your head off. 797 00:53:28,406 --> 00:53:31,240 OK, booger, your Kiss ticket or your life. 798 00:53:31,240 --> 00:53:33,243 Please, sir, don't beat me up. 799 00:53:33,285 --> 00:53:35,537 I do have a Kiss ticket but not on me. 800 00:53:35,580 --> 00:53:38,918 Oh, likely story. Now hand it over, punk. 801 00:53:38,918 --> 00:53:42,377 No, really. My brother's holding it for safekeeping. 802 00:53:42,419 --> 00:53:44,631 Please, let me get him for you. 803 00:53:44,671 --> 00:53:46,423 Hey, Chongo. 804 00:53:57,435 --> 00:53:59,269 Look, little kid... 805 00:53:59,312 --> 00:54:01,897 I don't need to see Kiss that bad. 806 00:54:01,939 --> 00:54:03,440 Don't try to run, you maggot. 807 00:54:03,483 --> 00:54:06,194 Chongo's an all-state track star in every event. 808 00:54:15,620 --> 00:54:19,457 Lookit, man, you can have my wallet, OK? 809 00:54:19,457 --> 00:54:21,460 I was gonna take your wallet anyway... 810 00:54:21,460 --> 00:54:23,460 after Chongo and his friends crush your ribcage... 811 00:54:23,460 --> 00:54:25,963 Iike a pack of Luckys, punk. 812 00:54:26,004 --> 00:54:27,589 This fairy giving you shit, bro? 813 00:54:27,632 --> 00:54:30,426 He was gonna mug me for my Kiss tickets. 814 00:54:30,468 --> 00:54:31,930 That's nuts. 815 00:54:31,972 --> 00:54:35,265 I said, "Hey, little kid... 816 00:54:35,305 --> 00:54:37,308 "you know where I could take a piss?" 817 00:54:42,022 --> 00:54:45,190 OK, pimple dick, you have the option of walking outside... 818 00:54:45,232 --> 00:54:46,358 or gettin' dragged out. 819 00:54:46,400 --> 00:54:47,987 Please, sir. 820 00:54:48,027 --> 00:54:49,905 Don't kick my ass! 821 00:54:49,947 --> 00:54:53,325 I'll do anything to get out of a beating. 822 00:54:53,325 --> 00:54:55,617 Say, Chongo... 823 00:54:55,660 --> 00:54:58,079 perhaps we could use some extra cash... 824 00:54:58,121 --> 00:55:00,124 for tasty snacks at the Kiss concert... 825 00:55:00,166 --> 00:55:02,625 our weaselly friend won't be attending. 826 00:55:13,179 --> 00:55:15,179 Hey, move those lights over there. 827 00:55:32,656 --> 00:55:34,159 Hey, you. 828 00:55:34,201 --> 00:55:36,201 Man. 829 00:55:36,241 --> 00:55:37,619 Hey, come back here! 830 00:55:39,914 --> 00:55:41,331 Shit! 831 00:55:41,372 --> 00:55:43,334 Come here! Come here! 832 00:55:49,047 --> 00:55:53,010 All right, wise guy. You are so out of here. 833 00:55:53,052 --> 00:55:56,348 Fuck! Keep your paws to yourself, you dumb ape. 834 00:55:56,390 --> 00:55:58,223 Where'd he go? 835 00:56:03,355 --> 00:56:08,148 It's been a while since my boy had Holy Confession. 836 00:56:08,191 --> 00:56:09,275 Could you please-- 837 00:56:09,317 --> 00:56:11,070 Consider it done. 838 00:56:32,216 --> 00:56:33,551 It is about time... 839 00:56:33,592 --> 00:56:37,265 you gave up that stupid dream of yours once and for all! 840 00:56:37,265 --> 00:56:40,640 No son of mine is going to be a career musician... 841 00:56:40,683 --> 00:56:42,309 ever, ever, ever! 842 00:56:42,351 --> 00:56:44,352 Madam, madam. 843 00:56:44,395 --> 00:56:46,105 We are in a cathedral. 844 00:56:46,147 --> 00:56:47,441 I'll walk you out. 845 00:56:47,441 --> 00:56:49,941 Sorry. Sorry. 846 00:56:55,449 --> 00:56:57,993 Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. 847 00:56:58,076 --> 00:57:00,618 This is my first confession in a... 848 00:57:02,288 --> 00:57:03,874 really long time. 849 00:57:13,924 --> 00:57:15,967 That was our Viking Patrick Hirsch... 850 00:57:16,010 --> 00:57:17,596 and he's hung like a Norse. 851 00:57:17,637 --> 00:57:19,557 Our next amateur has a name like a bird... 852 00:57:19,599 --> 00:57:21,640 and if you like birds, you'll like this. 853 00:57:21,849 --> 00:57:23,434 It's just a swallow. 854 00:57:23,476 --> 00:57:26,437 So, put your hands together, make him feel at home... 855 00:57:26,479 --> 00:57:29,231 and please welcome...Hawk. 856 00:57:32,069 --> 00:57:34,236 Oh, shit. 857 00:57:34,278 --> 00:57:37,449 No, no, no, no. No way, man. 858 00:57:37,492 --> 00:57:39,451 You're not going to chicken out now, are you? 859 00:57:41,161 --> 00:57:42,578 You're right, Deacon. 860 00:57:43,661 --> 00:57:45,247 You're right, man. 861 00:57:46,332 --> 00:57:49,336 Shit! What am I saying? I got to do this. 862 00:57:49,336 --> 00:57:50,505 It's for Kiss. 863 00:59:18,051 --> 00:59:19,886 Oh, my God! 864 00:59:52,292 --> 00:59:54,879 Oh, the stink! 865 01:02:01,256 --> 01:02:03,633 Man! Dang! 866 01:02:11,141 --> 01:02:12,226 Man! 867 01:02:12,266 --> 01:02:14,267 Come back here, you punk! 868 01:02:14,309 --> 01:02:15,895 Move! 869 01:02:26,197 --> 01:02:27,323 Move it! 870 01:02:27,365 --> 01:02:29,410 Get off me, you bitch! 871 01:02:32,080 --> 01:02:34,457 Get up. Come on, move it, sweetie. 872 01:02:34,499 --> 01:02:35,915 Watch it, asshole. 873 01:02:35,958 --> 01:02:38,919 Where is he? Where did he go this time? 874 01:02:42,631 --> 01:02:44,092 Two hundred bucks? 875 01:02:44,134 --> 01:02:45,340 My time's precious... 876 01:02:45,382 --> 01:02:48,302 and that's a reasonable price to pay for your sorry life. 877 01:02:48,302 --> 01:02:49,930 Hold on, man. 878 01:02:51,515 --> 01:02:54,311 Look, I know how I can get the money. 879 01:02:54,352 --> 01:02:56,309 I just figured it out, man. 880 01:02:59,355 --> 01:03:01,443 But you might want to wait outside. 881 01:03:01,483 --> 01:03:02,485 I don't trust him. 882 01:03:02,527 --> 01:03:04,320 I think he's on the level. 883 01:03:04,320 --> 01:03:07,155 He's too stupid to do anything sneaky anyway. 884 01:03:07,155 --> 01:03:09,158 Look at him. He's a moron. 885 01:03:10,993 --> 01:03:13,662 You got fifteen minutes and not a second longer. 886 01:03:13,871 --> 01:03:18,083 Are you sure that you don't want to talk about... 887 01:03:18,125 --> 01:03:22,296 oh, carnal knowledge with a neighborhood girl? 888 01:03:22,338 --> 01:03:27,258 Or how about finding a box of magazines, huh? 889 01:03:27,300 --> 01:03:29,135 Under your dad's bed? 890 01:03:32,681 --> 01:03:36,019 Then I suggest you think of something... 891 01:03:36,061 --> 01:03:40,271 a little juicier to confess than losing Kiss tickets. 892 01:04:03,338 --> 01:04:06,216 You waiting for a confession? I thought you were Jewish. 893 01:04:06,257 --> 01:04:08,469 I have a confession. 894 01:04:21,689 --> 01:04:26,152 I didn't mean for that to be so intense. 895 01:04:26,194 --> 01:04:27,404 I can take it. 896 01:04:29,030 --> 01:04:31,950 I've been in love with you since the moment I saw you. 897 01:04:31,991 --> 01:04:35,161 I've just always been too scared to show it. 898 01:04:35,161 --> 01:04:38,290 That's exactly the same way I've always felt about you. 899 01:04:38,331 --> 01:04:40,416 Jeremiah, really? 900 01:04:40,456 --> 01:04:41,542 Really. 901 01:04:41,582 --> 01:04:44,586 And call me Jam. 902 01:04:44,586 --> 01:04:46,047 It's my band name. 903 01:04:54,096 --> 01:04:57,934 And now, for our grand prize of one hundred dollars... 904 01:04:57,976 --> 01:04:59,936 Don't worry, ladies. I'm not competing. 905 01:04:59,978 --> 01:05:02,146 If I did, you'd want your money back. 906 01:05:02,187 --> 01:05:03,605 And the winner is... 907 01:05:05,942 --> 01:05:07,277 Sir Loin! 908 01:05:25,170 --> 01:05:27,629 Hey, don't look so sad. 909 01:05:27,672 --> 01:05:29,175 The night is young-- 910 01:05:29,215 --> 01:05:31,678 filled with compensatory possibilities. 911 01:05:33,927 --> 01:05:35,638 Oh, thanks for the drinks. 912 01:05:35,680 --> 01:05:38,266 That was really generous. 913 01:05:39,309 --> 01:05:43,644 There's no reason for me to be around these parts anymore. 914 01:05:43,687 --> 01:05:46,483 I'm in a position to spend some money on you... 915 01:05:46,524 --> 01:05:50,112 if you'd get in a position and spend some time on me. 916 01:06:09,130 --> 01:06:11,592 I can't believe you're thinking of robbing this store. 917 01:06:11,634 --> 01:06:13,427 You don't pass "Go" and collect two hundred dollars... 918 01:06:13,469 --> 01:06:15,344 for pulling stuff like this. 919 01:06:15,344 --> 01:06:17,681 No shit. Is this really worth it? 920 01:06:17,847 --> 01:06:19,642 Sure, you're going to get your ass kicked... 921 01:06:19,683 --> 01:06:22,104 nine ways to Sunday by that fucking gorilla... 922 01:06:22,144 --> 01:06:24,897 but that's still a hundred times better... 923 01:06:24,940 --> 01:06:27,941 than getting it porked for the next three to five. 924 01:06:27,982 --> 01:06:29,609 What about that girl, Trip? 925 01:06:29,651 --> 01:06:31,905 She'll never forget this night. 926 01:06:31,947 --> 01:06:35,117 Even if you get away with it, she'll be scarred for life. 927 01:06:35,158 --> 01:06:38,119 When are you going to realize that sometimes being tough... 928 01:06:38,159 --> 01:06:40,079 means being tender? 929 01:06:40,121 --> 01:06:42,540 All right, everybody, shut up! 930 01:06:57,137 --> 01:06:59,139 I'm going to have to do this sometime. 931 01:07:07,397 --> 01:07:09,065 Might as well be now. 932 01:07:11,277 --> 01:07:12,403 Evening, honey. 933 01:07:13,069 --> 01:07:15,072 You know what I am, what this is... 934 01:07:15,072 --> 01:07:17,367 and what you need to do, so let's do it quick. 935 01:07:17,409 --> 01:07:19,034 Everybody else... 936 01:07:19,076 --> 01:07:22,413 kindly introduce yourselves to the floor and kiss it hello. 937 01:07:24,416 --> 01:07:26,334 Do it or die, bitch. 938 01:07:26,375 --> 01:07:28,042 I'm just a high school kid. 939 01:07:29,084 --> 01:07:30,671 Fuck school! 940 01:07:30,880 --> 01:07:34,175 I went through the motions till I was old enough to drop out. 941 01:07:34,216 --> 01:07:36,969 And where's all that studying going to get you tonight? 942 01:07:37,012 --> 01:07:40,890 Robbed at gunpoint and possibly shot in the fucking head! 943 01:07:42,600 --> 01:07:45,605 Hey, scumbag, drop it, or I'll blow your head off. 944 01:07:51,025 --> 01:07:52,902 You and what army? 945 01:07:56,448 --> 01:07:58,075 The Kiss Army. 946 01:08:33,317 --> 01:08:34,945 Oh, God, they're in there. 947 01:08:53,212 --> 01:08:54,880 Oh, shit! 948 01:08:54,922 --> 01:08:56,048 Come on! 949 01:09:12,357 --> 01:09:14,525 God, if you get me out of this... 950 01:09:14,567 --> 01:09:18,113 I swear I will never pull my pork again. 951 01:09:19,657 --> 01:09:21,408 Give me your gun, boy. 952 01:09:21,451 --> 01:09:23,119 You give me your gun, boy. 953 01:09:23,161 --> 01:09:25,328 I don't even think you have a gun. 954 01:09:25,369 --> 01:09:26,871 Neither do l. 955 01:09:26,913 --> 01:09:28,999 For the last time... 956 01:09:29,040 --> 01:09:30,919 take the piece out... 957 01:09:30,960 --> 01:09:32,295 Iay back down... 958 01:09:32,295 --> 01:09:34,295 or your mom's going to need Mr. Clean... 959 01:09:34,295 --> 01:09:36,964 to get the brains out of your ski cap! 960 01:10:19,258 --> 01:10:21,386 Thank you. 961 01:10:22,720 --> 01:10:24,097 Who are you? 962 01:10:24,097 --> 01:10:26,556 Eh, they call me Dr. Love. 963 01:10:42,030 --> 01:10:43,491 Is it true that Gene Simmons... 964 01:10:43,533 --> 01:10:46,579 had a cow's tongue grafted onto his real tongue? 965 01:10:46,620 --> 01:10:48,370 I think he, uh... 966 01:10:48,412 --> 01:10:50,747 had the piece of skin under his tongue removed... 967 01:10:50,956 --> 01:10:52,624 so he could stick it out farther. 968 01:10:52,667 --> 01:10:55,128 I was going to send you this, but... 969 01:10:56,129 --> 01:10:57,297 Ann Arbor? 970 01:10:57,338 --> 01:11:00,757 Yeah. My dad's company is relocating him. 971 01:11:00,967 --> 01:11:03,386 That's why I was acting so freaky at school today. 972 01:11:03,470 --> 01:11:06,097 I thought it'd be the last time I'd ever see you. 973 01:11:19,193 --> 01:11:20,903 Oh, fuck. 974 01:11:23,239 --> 01:11:26,367 You'd better have something really sinful for me this time. 975 01:11:26,409 --> 01:11:29,118 All right, Father, here it is. 976 01:11:29,161 --> 01:11:31,206 I feel a little ashamed talking to you about this... 977 01:11:31,289 --> 01:11:34,168 but I went to my cousin's wedding... 978 01:11:34,209 --> 01:11:36,044 and one of the bridesmaids... 979 01:11:36,085 --> 01:11:39,131 asked me if I wanted to take a bath. 980 01:11:39,173 --> 01:11:41,340 This is terrible. 981 01:11:41,381 --> 01:11:43,091 This girl was a total fox... 982 01:11:43,133 --> 01:11:45,386 so I finally gave into temptation... 983 01:11:45,428 --> 01:11:47,264 about a block away from the wedding reception... 984 01:11:47,306 --> 01:11:49,309 at this little motel that charges by the hour. 985 01:11:49,350 --> 01:11:52,143 When she peeled off that gown... 986 01:11:52,185 --> 01:11:57,398 you are not going to believe what she was wearing underneath. 987 01:11:57,440 --> 01:11:58,733 Was it a teddy? 988 01:12:00,278 --> 01:12:02,028 A bustier? 989 01:12:03,071 --> 01:12:04,531 Satin underwear? 990 01:12:06,199 --> 01:12:08,035 Crotchless panties? 991 01:12:08,035 --> 01:12:10,162 Leopard-skin bra? 992 01:12:11,203 --> 01:12:12,914 Fishnet leotard? 993 01:12:12,955 --> 01:12:15,417 A leather G-string? 994 01:12:16,627 --> 01:12:19,379 All right, guys, here. You want a sandwich? 995 01:12:19,379 --> 01:12:21,506 Come on. Go. Go! 996 01:12:21,547 --> 01:12:24,258 OK, fuck it, man. I give up. 997 01:12:28,222 --> 01:12:31,268 Oh, God, man, what now? Wolves? 998 01:12:42,404 --> 01:12:44,362 All right. 999 01:13:00,088 --> 01:13:03,091 I jump in the car. I hot-wire it in thirty seconds. 1000 01:13:03,133 --> 01:13:05,592 I start driving. Suddenly, I hear this scream. 1001 01:13:05,633 --> 01:13:09,220 The disco queen was asleep in the backseat the whole time. 1002 01:13:10,264 --> 01:13:12,266 What are we going to do with her anyway? 1003 01:13:12,307 --> 01:13:14,266 I don't know, but she looks like fun. 1004 01:13:19,440 --> 01:13:21,192 Hey, hey, take it easy. 1005 01:13:22,193 --> 01:13:23,487 Ah, God. 1006 01:13:23,528 --> 01:13:26,447 You don't want to get any whiskey dick around here. 1007 01:13:26,447 --> 01:13:29,158 Of course, you don't have to worry about that. 1008 01:13:31,119 --> 01:13:34,165 Aw, shit. 1009 01:13:34,206 --> 01:13:36,664 I see you've met Premature Peter. 1010 01:13:36,915 --> 01:13:37,999 I'm sorry. 1011 01:13:38,041 --> 01:13:39,293 That's OK. 1012 01:13:39,334 --> 01:13:41,252 It's been quite a night. 1013 01:13:41,295 --> 01:13:43,714 So far, you've seen me and my dick throw up. 1014 01:13:43,964 --> 01:13:46,926 I'm sure there's more where that came from, right? 1015 01:13:49,720 --> 01:13:51,555 Now come here. 1016 01:14:04,652 --> 01:14:06,154 You guys better kill me... 1017 01:14:06,154 --> 01:14:08,322 before you do what you're thinking about doing... 1018 01:14:08,363 --> 01:14:11,575 because when I get angry, I can bite down very hard. 1019 01:14:11,617 --> 01:14:15,038 Sweet Polly Purebred's got some spunk, huh? 1020 01:14:15,038 --> 01:14:16,872 I'll give her some spunk, all right. 1021 01:14:16,914 --> 01:14:18,874 We can strip that Beemer in fifteen minutes. 1022 01:14:18,916 --> 01:14:21,336 I say we can strip her in fifteen seconds. 1023 01:14:22,419 --> 01:14:25,422 Now, wait a minute, guys. Two on one ain't fair. 1024 01:14:25,464 --> 01:14:27,632 Why don't you let me get my friend Barbara? 1025 01:14:27,673 --> 01:14:31,011 You'd love her-- tits the size of your head. 1026 01:14:31,053 --> 01:14:32,931 You'll feel like a little baby sucking on them. 1027 01:14:32,972 --> 01:14:34,641 You guys like disco? 1028 01:14:34,683 --> 01:14:36,936 I teach disco dancing back at my church. 1029 01:14:36,977 --> 01:14:39,145 You guys look like you got a little rhythm in your blood. 1030 01:14:39,186 --> 01:14:42,189 Free lessons if you let me go. 1031 01:14:42,189 --> 01:14:46,570 Oh, I know a dance we could do-- the Horizontal Hustle. 1032 01:14:50,614 --> 01:14:52,450 Hey, peanut turds. 1033 01:14:52,492 --> 01:14:55,078 I'm here for the girl and the car. 1034 01:14:55,120 --> 01:14:56,955 You can try to stop me... 1035 01:14:56,996 --> 01:14:58,623 but you're not going to like what happens if you do. 1036 01:14:58,663 --> 01:15:01,292 It's too bad. He was such a young idiot. 1037 01:15:01,333 --> 01:15:03,878 Hey, he's a stupid boy. 1038 01:15:03,962 --> 01:15:05,881 He deserves to fucking die. 1039 01:15:15,640 --> 01:15:18,018 Tear these grease monkeys a new asshole! 1040 01:15:29,237 --> 01:15:33,073 One step out of that office, and your asses are Alpo. 1041 01:15:36,078 --> 01:15:38,080 I always come prepared. 1042 01:15:47,423 --> 01:15:49,341 You're the coolest. 1043 01:15:49,382 --> 01:15:52,719 I believe you were promised a ride to Disco lnferno. 1044 01:15:52,927 --> 01:15:54,637 Let me escort you to the car. 1045 01:15:54,678 --> 01:15:56,388 What about the fucking dogs? 1046 01:15:56,431 --> 01:15:58,558 You got a phone in there, man? 1047 01:15:58,600 --> 01:16:00,312 Call the cops. 1048 01:16:00,353 --> 01:16:01,895 You're fuckin' dead! 1049 01:16:06,942 --> 01:16:08,569 Beth, I feel like such an idiot. 1050 01:16:08,611 --> 01:16:11,406 Why didn't I just say something a year and a half ago? 1051 01:16:11,447 --> 01:16:13,864 Don't think about the past. 1052 01:16:13,907 --> 01:16:17,078 Let's just think about from today on. 1053 01:16:18,328 --> 01:16:20,122 I'll never forget you, Jam. 1054 01:16:20,122 --> 01:16:22,375 Church will never be the same. 1055 01:16:40,184 --> 01:16:42,979 God damn it, Beth! 1056 01:16:42,979 --> 01:16:44,437 I'm coming, Dad. 1057 01:16:45,981 --> 01:16:47,107 Well... 1058 01:16:48,900 --> 01:16:50,445 So... 1059 01:16:50,486 --> 01:16:53,988 I'll call you, as soon as we get a phone. 1060 01:16:54,029 --> 01:16:55,698 -All right. -Yeah. 1061 01:17:20,975 --> 01:17:22,144 I hope this helps. 1062 01:17:22,185 --> 01:17:23,936 No, no. You know what? 1063 01:17:23,978 --> 01:17:25,562 Strange as it may seem... 1064 01:17:25,603 --> 01:17:28,523 I don't think I can take the money. 1065 01:17:28,523 --> 01:17:30,985 It would cheapen the whole experience. 1066 01:17:31,027 --> 01:17:34,657 I ain't no Midnight Cowboy or anything like that. 1067 01:17:36,030 --> 01:17:37,575 I'm not paying you for the lovemaking. 1068 01:17:37,616 --> 01:17:39,576 I just want you to have this... 1069 01:17:39,576 --> 01:17:42,538 for whatever you needed it for when I made the offer. 1070 01:17:47,125 --> 01:17:49,170 Thanks. 1071 01:17:50,338 --> 01:17:52,090 Was there any money taken? 1072 01:17:52,131 --> 01:17:53,216 Nope... 1073 01:17:53,257 --> 01:17:56,967 but it is Smiley Mart's policy to give a cash reward of $150... 1074 01:17:57,010 --> 01:17:59,638 to anyone who stops a robbery. 1075 01:18:00,639 --> 01:18:03,351 I gave him the money, and he took off. 1076 01:18:05,853 --> 01:18:07,645 Thanks. 1077 01:18:07,854 --> 01:18:10,066 You see this guy again, call us, all right? 1078 01:18:10,107 --> 01:18:12,359 We want to ask him a few questions. 1079 01:18:12,401 --> 01:18:14,489 If I see Dr. Love again anytime soon... 1080 01:18:14,530 --> 01:18:17,864 you're going to have to wait till I'm done with him first. 1081 01:18:24,414 --> 01:18:26,374 One-thirty... 1082 01:18:26,416 --> 01:18:29,292 one-forty, and one-fifty. 1083 01:18:29,335 --> 01:18:31,337 That's all I got, man. 1084 01:18:37,886 --> 01:18:40,054 I really wanted things to work out for you... 1085 01:18:40,096 --> 01:18:41,972 my weaselly, dimwitted friend. 1086 01:18:42,013 --> 01:18:44,310 You got spunk. 1087 01:19:03,119 --> 01:19:06,123 At least I still got you, Stretch. 1088 01:19:11,084 --> 01:19:12,461 I took his head off. 1089 01:19:20,221 --> 01:19:22,472 Kiss? How dare they call themselves Kiss. 1090 01:19:22,513 --> 01:19:23,889 Kiss is about love. 1091 01:19:23,931 --> 01:19:29,605 They are teaching our children lust, betrayal, and hate. 1092 01:19:29,647 --> 01:19:31,605 We as parents are obligated-- 1093 01:19:31,647 --> 01:19:33,275 How's it going, Mom? 1094 01:19:34,567 --> 01:19:37,612 I'm going to ask you this nicely first. 1095 01:19:37,653 --> 01:19:39,281 Can I have my drumsticks back? 1096 01:19:39,323 --> 01:19:43,910 Your drumsticks are the least of your worries, young man. 1097 01:19:43,952 --> 01:19:45,412 You ran out on God! 1098 01:19:45,454 --> 01:19:48,123 My son just ran out on God! 1099 01:19:48,166 --> 01:19:50,668 You are in a world of-- 1100 01:19:50,919 --> 01:19:52,543 Trouble? 1101 01:19:52,585 --> 01:19:55,588 I've been in trouble for the past twelve hours. 1102 01:19:56,590 --> 01:19:59,886 I'm going to be in St. Bernard's boarding school... 1103 01:19:59,927 --> 01:20:02,181 for the next two years of my life, remember? 1104 01:20:02,222 --> 01:20:05,474 I'm going to be out of your hair until I am a legal adult! 1105 01:20:05,515 --> 01:20:07,601 Then all you have to do is go to church... 1106 01:20:07,642 --> 01:20:10,312 Iight a candle, and pray to some stupid statue... 1107 01:20:10,354 --> 01:20:12,565 and all is forgiven and forgotten, right, Mom? 1108 01:20:12,607 --> 01:20:15,442 Then you can spend your days in a guilt-free pursuit... 1109 01:20:15,484 --> 01:20:17,361 of more constructive activities... 1110 01:20:17,403 --> 01:20:21,324 Iike telling everybody else how screwed up their lives are. 1111 01:20:21,365 --> 01:20:22,993 Then you no longer need the patience... 1112 01:20:23,034 --> 01:20:24,533 and understanding required... 1113 01:20:24,575 --> 01:20:28,956 in order to talk to your own son on some normal plane. 1114 01:20:28,998 --> 01:20:31,001 That way, you don't even need to think... 1115 01:20:31,042 --> 01:20:33,962 about how tough it was for you when you were growing up. 1116 01:20:34,001 --> 01:20:36,379 It's probably a good thing, too, 'cause if you did... 1117 01:20:36,421 --> 01:20:38,007 you'd realize what a lousy... 1118 01:20:38,048 --> 01:20:41,094 goddamn, shitty-ass parent you are. 1119 01:20:46,265 --> 01:20:48,100 What has gotten into you? 1120 01:20:49,601 --> 01:20:53,314 I just lost my virginity in a confessional booth! 1121 01:20:53,356 --> 01:20:56,190 Lord have mercy! 1122 01:20:58,192 --> 01:20:59,446 Now... 1123 01:20:59,487 --> 01:21:01,990 for the last time... 1124 01:21:02,032 --> 01:21:06,118 Mom, give me back my fucking drumsticks. 1125 01:21:07,453 --> 01:21:08,578 Please. 1126 01:21:24,429 --> 01:21:25,597 Cute. 1127 01:21:43,573 --> 01:21:46,118 They grow upfast, don't they? 1128 01:21:48,285 --> 01:21:50,204 Hey, dude. 1129 01:21:50,245 --> 01:21:52,457 Dude, I got the cash, man. Check it out. 1130 01:21:54,250 --> 01:21:56,335 No, that can't be the last ticket! 1131 01:21:56,378 --> 01:21:57,629 God! 1132 01:21:58,378 --> 01:22:01,090 You fucking bastard! 1133 01:22:44,384 --> 01:22:46,304 Any luck? 1134 01:22:46,345 --> 01:22:50,515 Yeah, man, plenty, but it was all bad, man. 1135 01:22:50,556 --> 01:22:52,017 I found the Volvo. 1136 01:22:54,936 --> 01:22:56,354 Tickets? 1137 01:23:01,943 --> 01:23:03,945 Wait a second. I know how we can get in. 1138 01:23:03,986 --> 01:23:07,991 I say that we beat the shit out of each other, right? 1139 01:23:08,034 --> 01:23:09,492 Then we go to the ticket taker... 1140 01:23:09,535 --> 01:23:13,079 and we say that we got mugged and our tickets were stolen. 1141 01:23:13,121 --> 01:23:16,208 They have to let us in then, right? 1142 01:23:20,964 --> 01:23:22,255 Why not? 1143 01:23:54,370 --> 01:23:55,538 Go. 1144 01:23:56,539 --> 01:23:58,584 No! God! 1145 01:23:58,626 --> 01:24:01,004 Oh, man, you got to let us in. 1146 01:24:01,045 --> 01:24:02,673 Four muggers just stole our tickets. 1147 01:24:02,881 --> 01:24:04,882 You expect me to believe that? 1148 01:24:04,923 --> 01:24:06,925 Are you fucking kidding me? 1149 01:24:08,343 --> 01:24:09,636 Look at us. 1150 01:24:11,389 --> 01:24:12,891 It was those assholes right there! 1151 01:24:12,932 --> 01:24:14,475 They stole our tickets! 1152 01:24:14,516 --> 01:24:16,602 Number thirteen! 1153 01:24:16,643 --> 01:24:18,396 Hey, stop those guys. 1154 01:24:22,984 --> 01:24:24,692 They got tickets. 1155 01:24:24,901 --> 01:24:26,070 Let's see. Come here. 1156 01:24:26,111 --> 01:24:27,945 They even stole my wallet, man. 1157 01:24:27,945 --> 01:24:30,492 I've never even seen these assholes before. 1158 01:24:30,533 --> 01:24:33,996 In there, you'll find my Kiss Army picture l.D... 1159 01:24:34,037 --> 01:24:36,079 and a hundred and fifty bucks cash. 1160 01:24:43,463 --> 01:24:45,091 -Out of here. -Damn. 1161 01:24:48,967 --> 01:24:51,304 My midget weaselly friend. 1162 01:24:51,345 --> 01:24:55,309 I was really hoping things could work out for you. 1163 01:24:55,350 --> 01:24:57,351 You got spunk. 1164 01:24:57,393 --> 01:24:59,437 Go. 1165 01:24:59,478 --> 01:25:00,606 I got it, man. 1166 01:25:00,647 --> 01:25:02,148 We're going. 1167 01:25:30,218 --> 01:25:31,887 OK, then. 1168 01:25:43,022 --> 01:25:44,315 We want Kiss! 1169 01:26:00,165 --> 01:26:01,416 This is it. 1170 01:26:05,963 --> 01:26:08,675 You wanted the best, and you got the best! 1171 01:26:08,883 --> 01:26:10,883 The hottest band in the world-- 1172 01:26:10,967 --> 01:26:12,426 Kiss! 1173 01:26:30,238 --> 01:26:33,031 I feel uptight on a Saturday night 1174 01:26:35,409 --> 01:26:36,702 Nine o'clock 1175 01:26:36,911 --> 01:26:39,998 The radio's the only light 1176 01:26:41,121 --> 01:26:42,207 I hear my song 1177 01:26:42,248 --> 01:26:43,917 And it pulls me through 1178 01:26:46,169 --> 01:26:47,922 It comes on strong 1179 01:26:47,963 --> 01:26:50,175 Tells me what I got to do 1180 01:26:50,217 --> 01:26:51,299 I got to 1181 01:26:51,340 --> 01:26:52,425 Get up 1182 01:26:52,466 --> 01:26:54,302 Everybody's gonna move their feet 1183 01:26:54,343 --> 01:26:55,429 Get down 1184 01:26:55,470 --> 01:26:58,057 Everybody's gonna leave their seat 1185 01:26:58,933 --> 01:27:02,602 You gotta lose your mind in Detroit Rock City 1186 01:27:02,643 --> 01:27:04,104 Get up 1187 01:27:04,146 --> 01:27:05,480 Everybody's gonna move their feet 1188 01:27:05,522 --> 01:27:06,940 Get down 1189 01:27:06,940 --> 01:27:08,443 Everybody's gonna leave their seat 1190 01:27:28,587 --> 01:27:31,466 Movin' fast, doin' ninety-five 1191 01:27:33,675 --> 01:27:35,636 I hit top speed 1192 01:27:35,677 --> 01:27:38,264 Still movin' much too slow 1193 01:27:39,640 --> 01:27:40,975 I feel so good 1194 01:27:41,016 --> 01:27:43,354 I'm so alive 1195 01:27:45,187 --> 01:27:46,647 I hear my song 1196 01:27:46,688 --> 01:27:48,441 Playin' on the radio 1197 01:27:48,482 --> 01:27:50,277 And it goes 1198 01:27:50,318 --> 01:27:51,444 Get up 1199 01:27:51,486 --> 01:27:54,612 Everybody's gonna move their feet 1200 01:28:19,139 --> 01:28:20,265 Get up 1201 01:28:20,306 --> 01:28:23,309 Everybody's gonna leave their seat